I tell ya, some people just take this shit WAY too seriously.. A couple of entries ago I linked to a YouTube of Alice Cooper. In the clip, he was using a riding crop as a prop. I got a message on Yahoo from someone and it totally floored me.
"I will say your writing is amusing but I must take issue with the Cooper video."
"With the video?"
"Indeed. he is clearly not using the crop in a proper fashion. He uses his entire arm to swing instead of his wrist."
After I stopped laughing, I sat here and was wondering exactly how I wanted to answer this. In the end, I chose not to answer at all.
No, seriously folks. If you take BDSM that serious you've got a fucking problem.. LOL
Speaking of Yahoo.. my yahoo addy is Ultimatedomme@yahoo.com
Feel free to add me to your list and chat me up if you'd like. But if you try to cyber me you'd better be pretty fucking good, dammit!
Some people simply do not believe in the idea of female domination. I'm used to seeing this in folks who are in their 40's, 50's and older. But this is a 24 dominant in Texas. His profile is short and basically says, "Men rooool and wimmens don't."
Yeah, without debating the topic.... Here's one of his journals.
"Oxymoron of the century:
"female dominant""
I'll bet he's already gotten a lot of messages from those who were quite willing to tell him to get his head out of his ass... Anyway, I added his profile to my favorites of course so I could find it.
Welllllllllllllllllll... He messages and wants to know if he knows me and why did I add him as a favorite.
No need to lie here, I simply told him I wanted to be able to find it.
So he wants to know if there were a particular reason and I replied that yes there is.
Ah, except when he wanted to know what that reason was I opted not to play 20 questions any more and told him not to worry about it.
Right.. So this fella has a brand spankin' new journal entry..
"If I've never talked to you, do not add me as a "favorite," regardless of the reason. The person who did this knows who they are."
I swear, when I saw that I could almost imagine his cheeks puffed out in anger at having someone he doesn't know add him as a favorite.... LOL.. And then authoritative way in which he words himself gives way to the mental image of him with his hands on his hips, jutting forward to make this proclimation.
And for some reason, he's viewed my profile three or four times since then.. Hmmmm
Oooooooo that'll teach me.. Here's my answer to you, gomer.. I did it.. Get the fuck over it.. Stop crying.. Have a nice fucking day, bitch. Besides, ask almost any woman on CM how many people they've never spoken to they have on their admirers list....It's really not a big fucking deal, bozo.
Heh, actually I was just going to use that one journal entry to recall how a few weeks ago I got a message from an older gentleman from the south..
"If you knew how to make biscuits you wouldn't be on here writin' all this shit, missy."
Yikes!
Okay then, so send along those biscuit recipes and i'll get right on it.
You know you're having a bad day when.....
Well for this fella, he knew he was having a bad day when he posted the following journal entry.
This is a 34 submissive in New York.
"Found out I was blocked by somebody I've never actually had any interaction with. No email chat request or anything. I know my profile is a little rough, but that's a first."
Actually, I don't think there's anything at all wrong with his profile. But really, to be blocked by someone before there was any contact at all? Wow! That definitely goes under the header of having a bad day.
Ah okay, so let's examine this and see if we can figure out the events that happened leading up to this cat getting blocked with no prior contact with that person.. Hmmmm.. I can only think of one viable scenario.
Some woman was sitting there at her computer, logged into CM.. The "Who's Viewing Me?" tab turns red for the umpteenth time that day and here's this guy...
"EeeeeeeeK!" comes her startled scream... Her heart begins to pound and fearing that this guy is going to do the unthinkable and send a message.. She takes preemptive action and blocks him... Danger averted.
Hmm, I dunno. Maybe the guy was just having a bad day....
We got plenty of lulz from when that submissive woman put "You must tribute me" on her profile.. She's since taken it out of her profile but it was fun while it lasted..
However my friends, i'm here to introduce you to the next generation of gift card subs... Hailing from the great state of Pennsylvania... Standing 6 foot tall and tipping the scales at an even 200 lbs..
I give you the one.... the only..... NORM5000!!!
He's even got an amazon wish list,, heheh, check out the profile folks, it's chock full of lulz.
And that leads me right into the next topic, and this is kind of funny.. But in a really pathetic way. And for those of you who have ever been involved with a financial dominant on CM, or online in general.. pay close attention..
I think we can pretty sure most of the 19-23 year old financial dommes on CM aren't really woman, but just guys trying to bilk people out of cash. I'm sure there are SOME real ones, but that's beside the point. The following is an exchange I had with someone on CM and then on Yahoo.. I'm not going to reveal the name other than to say this is a 47 domiant in Texas. However it IS reported to the admin of the site.
"XxxxxXxxxxXXXX on 1/29/11 at 8:57 AM:
I have a proposal for you which would be mutually beneficial
UltimateDomme on 1/29/11 at 8:58 AM:
You do, huh?
XxxxxXxxxxxXXXX on 1/29/11 at 9:03 AM:
Yes I do. I became aware of a way to really "work" this website and gain from it, but I need the help of a young attractive domme to put it into play. It would be a team effort and we would both gain, to let me know your seriously interested in learning details and possibly persuing what I have in mind join me in chat on yahoo, (addy edited out.)
UltimateDomme on 1/29/11 at 9:08 AM:
"work" this website.. as in make money from it?
XxxxxXxxxxxXXXX on 1/29/11 at 9:17 AM:
absolutely... I don't have time for banter or lessons in ethics... I gave you my yahoo ID, if your interested you know what to do
UltimateDomme on 1/29/11 at 9:37 AM:
Okay, i'll message you on Yahoo
So off to Yahoo weeeeeeeeee go.. I added the cat and the following is the pertinent part of that conversation.
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: After messaging you I saw another profile that seems to suggest that you are not the person protrayed in the pic associated with the profile I messaged you under.
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: Is this true?
ultimatedomme: Oh noesssss... Did you actually read my profile?
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: Yes and your profile makes no sense whatsoever, the only truth I could find in your profile is that none of it was true
ultimatedomme: LOL.. Yet you messaged me anyway with your proposal?
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: Which led me to believe that you to have had your fill of the fakes and liars on that website
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: yes I messaged you because I feel I am aware of the dynamics within you which generated you to create such a profile
ultimatedomme: Fakes and liars.. and people with totally out of this world ideas.. Yeah, I have
Xxxxx XXXXXX: afterall someone that isn't fed up with it wouldn't create such a profile, right?
ultimatedomme: True but only to a certain extent.. I also see the humor on that site, which is really why I created the profile and blog.
Xxxxx XXXXXX: Ok
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: at a certain point it does become comical but that point is well past the point of being rediculous
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: Its so rediculous it is comical in a sense
ultimatedomme: Yes, you could say that.
ultimatedomme: Out of curiosity, what profile did you see that suggests I'm not that person in my picture, Was it MstressAriel?
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: On to the reason we are here... I have theorized a way to financially gain from the website... bottom line is would you be interested in persuing this? Its nothing illegal or really dishonest though it is deviant in some ways but not really dishonest.
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: Yes it was MistressAriel
ultimatedomme: That's who I really am.
ultimatedomme: I might be, but i'd have to know what it is before I could say for sure.
Okay, you'll note that this cat apparently took my profile to mean I was fed up with the people and the site in general... And now here he is with some proposal to financially benefit from this..
Right then.. here's the rest of the conversation where he lays out his plan..
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: Financial dominance
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: but not asking for it, rather getting them to volunteer it
ultimatedomme: Yeah, I getting plenty of offers to do such as it is.
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: then you don't need me
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: or do you?
ultimatedomme: Well, itf financial dominance was something I wanted to do, i'd be real curious to know exactly where you come into it?
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: I am currently taking courses to become a lisenced hypno therapist
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: I have gotten pretty good at it
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: Lets be realistic a minute regarding financial dominance of subs/slaves in collarme
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: If you were to get "tribute" from a sub how much could you realistically expect a month?
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: 100?
ultimatedomme: 100? LOL
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: 200 a month at best?
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: yeah I mean really
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: and how long would it last?
ultimatedomme: how about 60k a year?
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: oh really
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: then I am waisting mine and your time both
ultimatedomme: Yes, why do you think that site is full of financial dominants?
ultimatedomme: If that's something you are interested in doing, why not just do what many others are doing and setting up an account to do so.. Do you really think most of that financial dommes on CM are really women?
ultimatedomme: most of those, rather
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: My thinking was that if I/we could get tribute in the amount of 250 a month from 50 subs that be 25k a month to split
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: excuse me 12k a month to split
ultimatedomme: Oh yeah, easily
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: which would be over 60k a year for each of us
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: but if you are getting that already this is a waste of my time
ultimatedomme: I;'m not getting that.. I'm just saying that how much some of them make
ultimatedomme: I'm still curious to know where you come into it though.
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: I can make it lasting, consistent and ongoing, once a sub submits they will be onboard indefinitely
ultimatedomme: Ah,. using that hypnotherapy you mentioned?
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: Over time requiring less and less interaction and eventually coming to a point that no interaction is required, they simply pay like paying bill every month
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: *a bill
Ah ha! So his idea to be the person behind the financial domme and making sure the subs stay on the hook via use of hypnosis.
ultimatedomme: You could simply create a domme profile and do that.. you don't need me.
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: yes using hypnosis
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: I do not wish to pretend to be a woman and if I did so at some point I would encounter needing to verify who I am and I would not be able to do that
ultimatedomme: I see.
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: It would be a team effort, working together
ultimatedomme: You know what sickens me the most.. It's that sooner or later you're going to talk someone in doing this..
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: I am not interested in a moral sermon
ultimatedomme: I hope you don't... but greed demands it.
ultimatedomme: No sermon, just no, i'm not interested.
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: then why did you come here to talk to me?
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: to try to talk some sense into me?
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: whats your objective here?
ultimatedomme: Heheheh... you've not read my blof have you?
ultimatedomme: blog
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: nope
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: again I ask what is your objective here
ultimatedomme: Perhaps you should..
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: your not going to answer my question are you
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: I answer your questions but you don't answer mine, whos the one that needs the lesson in moral ethics?
Xxxxx Xxxxxx: toodles
ultimatedomme: You.. my obejective is simple.. you've dropped a gold nugget of comedy into my lap.. which is what my blog is all about
ultimatedomme: You take care, gomer.. ya heah?
And finis'
And there you have it folks, here's a slimeball seeking to use his ability with hypnosis in tandem with a young, attactive domme as a way to get financial subs and keep them on the hook. Hmm, and after the fact I am wondering why he can't just hypnotise those subs into thinking they DID verify? Ahh, nevermind.
And for you people who think i'm fed up with CM and the BDSM scene in general, that's not the least bit true. Again, my purpose in creating the UltimateDomme profile and this blog is humor.. Nothing more, nothing less.
TTFN
The Bitch
Saturday, January 29, 2011
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
Ahhhh, sometimes you see a profile and all you can do when seeing it is click your tongue, roll your eyes and just keep browsing.
This is a 26 lesbian submissive in California..
"hey listen: "gold color boarderd members" are NOT my friends. I'm not interested in NON REGULAR USERS! understood?"
I sat here and fought with myself. I SOOOOOOOOOO wanted to message this person and say something like, "Er, you DO know those gold colored members are the ones who run the site.. err right?" I wanted to do it... so bad...
But in the end I decided not to do it... Some people just need to be left the fuck alone.. Besides, maybe I read that wrong and there is a REASON those gold bordered members aren't her friend, hmm?
Mmm, I got an interesting message in response to my last entry concerning the ranter. This person told me that any good submissive knows that she should treat approaching a MASTER (<--- Yeah, he made it a point to type that in all caps...) as if they were applying for a job.
I actually agree with that to a certain extent.... But let's take this just a little deeper, shall we?
Okay, if we're treating it like a job interview, what would you imagine the sub/applicant should be doing if they want a realistic chance of landing the position? How about.... Oh I don't know... Errrr.. Doing some research about the company? I dunno about anyone else, but that's from job interviewing 101, being prepared for the interview.
So the sub in this scenario does not just approach said MASTER as a supplicant without knowing anything about them.. and why? Because this is the fucking internet and there's no telling what sort of maladjusted whack job is on the other side of the screen..
Look, if you're going to put on your profile that you want your sub to have intelligence, TRY not to be too surprised if she decides she's going to use the very intelligence you say you want.
I saw one profile where the guy says that at BDSM meetings of old the Doms and Dommes sat around smoking cigars and drinking wine while the submissives played with each other on the floor. Err, maybe in BDSM CHATROOMS this happened. The dominants sitting on their "Dom-o-Lounger" chatting with other dom/mes, congratulating each other for choosing to be dom/me while the subs ran around with water balloons and coloring books doing "subbie stuff." (IRC anyone?)
Anyway, here's a profile to check out and this profile absolutely shoots out of the water all of these ideas many 40 something MASTERS claim to be the way things used to be.
This is a 59 dominant in the UK and here's a little of his profile..
"Pre-internet ideals within Bdsm gave credibility for honesty, it allowed for passions which many slaves found embarrassing and unacceptable practices to others of a vanilla mind-set, which is what makes them vanilla minded. They, the vanilla; are unable to accept that sensuality is unique to the individual, and does not arrive in neat little packages with bows attached.
As a pre-internet Owner of many years standing, I have been fortunate to have met honesty in many like minded, and these were either masochistic minds or those who enjoyed the fascination of obedience as a totality and reality.
When the internet allowed a worldwide ability for like minds to meet and chat, it was a joyous time, but also a dangerous time as well. Non-consensual predators took the lives of many, and so SSC was begun to lessen the danger. And for the newly arrived Bdsm 101 was also formulated to give guidance and direction."
This is a long profile but in my opinion it's a great read and gives a realistic view of many things inherent to the BDSM world. I'd urge you all to find and give this profile a read, not that I'd expect anyone's mind to be changed or anything like that.
Now I am not trying to say what this guy says is the gospel. But his views based on what I know personally about BDSM "pre internet" are at least grounded in realism.
I somewhat agree with what he says about the advent of the internet and the new people who came to the scene because of it. However not only did it bring in new people to partake in this thing of ours, but it also brought in new IDEAS.
The very existance of Gor is proof of that.(Not the books) I don't have anything against Gor as practiced online, because as practiced online it's very similar to role playing games. SecondLife has a bit of a Gor population and in my opinion the sort of graphical online world that is Secondlife is tailor made for those who who want to live in a gothic castle, or yes, a Gorean town. Seriously, those of you who are into Gor might want to give Secondlife a look.
Because of the internet, some who practice Gor have taken it a few steps beyond and call themselves Gorean and say it is a lifestyle. I personally don't buy that and see Gor as nothing more than BDSM and D/s seen through a different set of eyes. But here I present it as an example of a new idea that has come into being because of the internet.
Anyway, give this cat's profile a read.
Oh me, oh my..
A consequence of the recent profile change I made brought me right in the middle of that "Go back to square one" game I spoke of.. You remember the game, don't you? Dommes that could at any time be "broken" and sent back to the beginning of the road as a submissive. Now, this game does not involve weeks and months of knowing someone and having the dynamics change over time, not at all. This game centers around the idea of if someone wishes to get with another, and to do that they will have to be a submissive to them, then submissive they will be.
Yeah, so I started getting messages from other ummm dommes and one in particular that turned out to be a masterpiece of pure comedy.... That ended in me being blocked. Anytime I have a conversation with a moron and I end up getting blocked, I call that a good conversation. I'm not going to post the whole converation because it went on too long and frankly I don't wish to inflict upon you folks the eye battering grammar this person uses, but you'll get the cliffs.. Who knows, maybe i'll put the whole conversation together and start a hall of fame or something like that.... but for now...
FADE IN:
This begins with a message asking if i'd loan them to her. (You remember the profile, it said if anyone wants to use them, just ask me.. BIG mistake folks.. BIG mistake!!.. I thought I got a lot of mail before.. But FUCK!)
Ah, and the very next message this person sends is this..
"u r very pretty have u ever dommed a domme"
So.. the game is afoot... The following negotiations brought about the proclimation that she would not be like the others beeeeeeeecause.........
"ya i understand but i cannot b like her u have to b very discreet with me iam going thru a very nasty divorce with millions of dollors on the line"
Okay, time out for a commercial break here.. Going through a nasty divorce with millions of dollars on the line.. Yet she's on a site like CM... Yeah anyone else calling "Bullshit" on this angle? Ah, okay then.. is anyone else calling bullshit on the entire bit? ..... LOL, yeah I thought as much.. Well, let's get back to the show...
FADE IN:
In the end, the bitch (That's me) decides I could not in good faith accept a slave I had to hide. No no no, none of that, "not letting any 1 know that iam u r slut or will b u r slut" bullcrap for me, I refuseeeeeed..
So that's the end of it, yes? No..
Fade Out: .. Fade in:
Over a week later, I get a message from this same person asking if we could be friends.. Umm, I was in a particularly devilish mood so i'm afraid I provoked him.. I told him somthing about only being enchanted with my picture and that was too shallow for me..
It turns out, this is one of those rocket scientests that read my profile and took the damn thing seriously.. I pointed out that the profile was pure satire and this is when the torrent of comedy really started. The following is coming from a supposed "mistress" just after I sent this message to him in response to realizing he'd taken my profile seriously..
"LMAO, you're kidding right?
No really, you read my profile and took it seriously? Well, I suppose it's impossible to keep idiots from showing who they are.
Hey brain surgeon, my profile is 100% pure satire, too bad you missed it.
All kidding aside, just go pretend to be a domme elsewhere. Believe me when I tell you that you're way out of your league here.
Although.. I *DO* have those messages you sent me telling me you wanted to be my sub.. hmmm... I'm all of a sudden kind of happy I didn't delete them."
Now, being honest with myself this DOES kinda look like I was about to blackmail him... It's not true but I can see it from his point of view...
"so what u can push them up u r lose ass u and u r masseges r u trying to black mail me with them u fucking worthless cunt u think u r some thing . u r not even pretty u r fake whore the brain surgeon is u r mother whorefor bringging such an idiot to life go smoke couple hits like always what is u r education slut 1st grader , they dont need to look any more for the missing link u r it"
Now, i'm not entirely sure what the above says, but if I read it correctly, it would seem to indicate that he is not exactly happy with me having kept the messages where he offered to be my sub. Err, anyone else get that read on this?
As I said, I realized when I got this message that from his point of view it did rather look like I was going to try to blackmail him.. So I put that to rest..
"Dude, dude.. take your chill pill.. I've no intention of blackmailing you at all.. I guess that means you no longer wanna be my friend? LOL
That was a pretty interesting reaction to being exposed as a fucking moron though.."
"u r friend u fucking worthless whore and u calling me dude like the trash that u r why u r momm is a dude fucking whore like u"
I did say I was only going to give the cliffnotes version, so we'll hop forward a bit.. After a few more of these sorts of messages he brought out the idea that I am fake.. oh noeeesssss..
Wellllllllllll... I send back my reply that was the killing shot.. I simply sent him this link...
http://catchafake2.blogspot.com/
And told him to check it out because he was on it. And that was when I got blocked. *smirk* He sent back one last message.. in large bold type...
"wrong iam real u r fake thats the diffrence and u will b put on the fake list on all sites and blocked starting this second"
And then one curtain call message again in big bold type after I was blocked.
"From: DOMME26
Dated: 1/25/11 6:13 AM
WHORE"
FADE OUT:
Folks i've said it before.. You just can't make this shit up.
Errr, but for you wanting to find dommes that can be broken.. this one is in play LOL....
About that link and other sites and profiles and give lessons as to how you can tell.. It always seems to center around the pictures.
However, this is something from a profile that gives another way you can tell..
"Some one asked me the other day:
1. Do you always want an explanation or specific details on what someone is doing?
2. and do you always analyze the answer for some hidden meaning
I said "I am a woman, what do you think?"
He didn't get it, so I had to explain.
"You can probably always tell a male pretending to be a woman online simply because he isn't wondering those two things""
Have you ever heard the phrase that women are not visual? It's not total bullcrap. I can't speak for ALL women but I can speak for myself when I say the idea of getting nude pictures of men and women isn't high on my list of priorities if I want to get to know them. Although I do like to see the photos of an exceptionally cute TV/CD. (Note, this is NOT an open invitation for you TV/CD types to start bombarding me with photos.. LOL)
It's defintely more of a guy thing. (There are always exceptions but as a general rule, it suffices) And what are these fake lesbians doing most often? Yep, the whole picture trading bit. (Send to receive is their manifesto.) Pictures of their chosen persona is their currency, their very lifeblood as it were.
When it's just that, these fake lesbians are mostly harmless. Seriously they are easy enough to spot. But there are some real people out there who are lesbian and the ones I know on CM want nothing more than to find someone they can be happy with. THAT is when all these fake lesbians become dangerous. They are going to start chatting with, and eventually sparks are going to happen and you all know how it's going to end... The fake is going to disappear or will be caught, leaving the real person hurt in their wake.
It's not exclusive to CM, however. That has gone on since Compuserve in the early/mid 80's. (Does the term Ci$ bring back memories for anyone? If so, let me know who you are.)
Anyyyyyyyyway.. I'm going to end this by pointing you toward a good profile.. I may make it a habit on the blog to do this.. hmmmm.. But give him a look.. His name is JakeSpeed and is a 40 dominant in Maryland.
This is a 26 lesbian submissive in California..
"hey listen: "gold color boarderd members" are NOT my friends. I'm not interested in NON REGULAR USERS! understood?"
I sat here and fought with myself. I SOOOOOOOOOO wanted to message this person and say something like, "Er, you DO know those gold colored members are the ones who run the site.. err right?" I wanted to do it... so bad...
But in the end I decided not to do it... Some people just need to be left the fuck alone.. Besides, maybe I read that wrong and there is a REASON those gold bordered members aren't her friend, hmm?
Mmm, I got an interesting message in response to my last entry concerning the ranter. This person told me that any good submissive knows that she should treat approaching a MASTER (<--- Yeah, he made it a point to type that in all caps...) as if they were applying for a job.
I actually agree with that to a certain extent.... But let's take this just a little deeper, shall we?
Okay, if we're treating it like a job interview, what would you imagine the sub/applicant should be doing if they want a realistic chance of landing the position? How about.... Oh I don't know... Errrr.. Doing some research about the company? I dunno about anyone else, but that's from job interviewing 101, being prepared for the interview.
So the sub in this scenario does not just approach said MASTER as a supplicant without knowing anything about them.. and why? Because this is the fucking internet and there's no telling what sort of maladjusted whack job is on the other side of the screen..
Look, if you're going to put on your profile that you want your sub to have intelligence, TRY not to be too surprised if she decides she's going to use the very intelligence you say you want.
I saw one profile where the guy says that at BDSM meetings of old the Doms and Dommes sat around smoking cigars and drinking wine while the submissives played with each other on the floor. Err, maybe in BDSM CHATROOMS this happened. The dominants sitting on their "Dom-o-Lounger" chatting with other dom/mes, congratulating each other for choosing to be dom/me while the subs ran around with water balloons and coloring books doing "subbie stuff." (IRC anyone?)
Anyway, here's a profile to check out and this profile absolutely shoots out of the water all of these ideas many 40 something MASTERS claim to be the way things used to be.
This is a 59 dominant in the UK and here's a little of his profile..
"Pre-internet ideals within Bdsm gave credibility for honesty, it allowed for passions which many slaves found embarrassing and unacceptable practices to others of a vanilla mind-set, which is what makes them vanilla minded. They, the vanilla; are unable to accept that sensuality is unique to the individual, and does not arrive in neat little packages with bows attached.
As a pre-internet Owner of many years standing, I have been fortunate to have met honesty in many like minded, and these were either masochistic minds or those who enjoyed the fascination of obedience as a totality and reality.
When the internet allowed a worldwide ability for like minds to meet and chat, it was a joyous time, but also a dangerous time as well. Non-consensual predators took the lives of many, and so SSC was begun to lessen the danger. And for the newly arrived Bdsm 101 was also formulated to give guidance and direction."
This is a long profile but in my opinion it's a great read and gives a realistic view of many things inherent to the BDSM world. I'd urge you all to find and give this profile a read, not that I'd expect anyone's mind to be changed or anything like that.
Now I am not trying to say what this guy says is the gospel. But his views based on what I know personally about BDSM "pre internet" are at least grounded in realism.
I somewhat agree with what he says about the advent of the internet and the new people who came to the scene because of it. However not only did it bring in new people to partake in this thing of ours, but it also brought in new IDEAS.
The very existance of Gor is proof of that.(Not the books) I don't have anything against Gor as practiced online, because as practiced online it's very similar to role playing games. SecondLife has a bit of a Gor population and in my opinion the sort of graphical online world that is Secondlife is tailor made for those who who want to live in a gothic castle, or yes, a Gorean town. Seriously, those of you who are into Gor might want to give Secondlife a look.
Because of the internet, some who practice Gor have taken it a few steps beyond and call themselves Gorean and say it is a lifestyle. I personally don't buy that and see Gor as nothing more than BDSM and D/s seen through a different set of eyes. But here I present it as an example of a new idea that has come into being because of the internet.
Anyway, give this cat's profile a read.
Oh me, oh my..
A consequence of the recent profile change I made brought me right in the middle of that "Go back to square one" game I spoke of.. You remember the game, don't you? Dommes that could at any time be "broken" and sent back to the beginning of the road as a submissive. Now, this game does not involve weeks and months of knowing someone and having the dynamics change over time, not at all. This game centers around the idea of if someone wishes to get with another, and to do that they will have to be a submissive to them, then submissive they will be.
Yeah, so I started getting messages from other ummm dommes and one in particular that turned out to be a masterpiece of pure comedy.... That ended in me being blocked. Anytime I have a conversation with a moron and I end up getting blocked, I call that a good conversation. I'm not going to post the whole converation because it went on too long and frankly I don't wish to inflict upon you folks the eye battering grammar this person uses, but you'll get the cliffs.. Who knows, maybe i'll put the whole conversation together and start a hall of fame or something like that.... but for now...
FADE IN:
This begins with a message asking if i'd loan them to her. (You remember the profile, it said if anyone wants to use them, just ask me.. BIG mistake folks.. BIG mistake!!.. I thought I got a lot of mail before.. But FUCK!)
Ah, and the very next message this person sends is this..
"u r very pretty have u ever dommed a domme"
So.. the game is afoot... The following negotiations brought about the proclimation that she would not be like the others beeeeeeeecause.........
"ya i understand but i cannot b like her u have to b very discreet with me iam going thru a very nasty divorce with millions of dollors on the line"
Okay, time out for a commercial break here.. Going through a nasty divorce with millions of dollars on the line.. Yet she's on a site like CM... Yeah anyone else calling "Bullshit" on this angle? Ah, okay then.. is anyone else calling bullshit on the entire bit? ..... LOL, yeah I thought as much.. Well, let's get back to the show...
FADE IN:
In the end, the bitch (That's me) decides I could not in good faith accept a slave I had to hide. No no no, none of that, "not letting any 1 know that iam u r slut or will b u r slut" bullcrap for me, I refuseeeeeed..
So that's the end of it, yes? No..
Fade Out: .. Fade in:
Over a week later, I get a message from this same person asking if we could be friends.. Umm, I was in a particularly devilish mood so i'm afraid I provoked him.. I told him somthing about only being enchanted with my picture and that was too shallow for me..
It turns out, this is one of those rocket scientests that read my profile and took the damn thing seriously.. I pointed out that the profile was pure satire and this is when the torrent of comedy really started. The following is coming from a supposed "mistress" just after I sent this message to him in response to realizing he'd taken my profile seriously..
"LMAO, you're kidding right?
No really, you read my profile and took it seriously? Well, I suppose it's impossible to keep idiots from showing who they are.
Hey brain surgeon, my profile is 100% pure satire, too bad you missed it.
All kidding aside, just go pretend to be a domme elsewhere. Believe me when I tell you that you're way out of your league here.
Although.. I *DO* have those messages you sent me telling me you wanted to be my sub.. hmmm... I'm all of a sudden kind of happy I didn't delete them."
Now, being honest with myself this DOES kinda look like I was about to blackmail him... It's not true but I can see it from his point of view...
"so what u can push them up u r lose ass u and u r masseges r u trying to black mail me with them u fucking worthless cunt u think u r some thing . u r not even pretty u r fake whore the brain surgeon is u r mother whorefor bringging such an idiot to life go smoke couple hits like always what is u r education slut 1st grader , they dont need to look any more for the missing link u r it"
Now, i'm not entirely sure what the above says, but if I read it correctly, it would seem to indicate that he is not exactly happy with me having kept the messages where he offered to be my sub. Err, anyone else get that read on this?
As I said, I realized when I got this message that from his point of view it did rather look like I was going to try to blackmail him.. So I put that to rest..
"Dude, dude.. take your chill pill.. I've no intention of blackmailing you at all.. I guess that means you no longer wanna be my friend? LOL
That was a pretty interesting reaction to being exposed as a fucking moron though.."
"u r friend u fucking worthless whore and u calling me dude like the trash that u r why u r momm is a dude fucking whore like u"
I did say I was only going to give the cliffnotes version, so we'll hop forward a bit.. After a few more of these sorts of messages he brought out the idea that I am fake.. oh noeeesssss..
Wellllllllllll... I send back my reply that was the killing shot.. I simply sent him this link...
http://catchafake2.blogspot.com/
And told him to check it out because he was on it. And that was when I got blocked. *smirk* He sent back one last message.. in large bold type...
"wrong iam real u r fake thats the diffrence and u will b put on the fake list on all sites and blocked starting this second"
And then one curtain call message again in big bold type after I was blocked.
"From: DOMME26
Dated: 1/25/11 6:13 AM
WHORE"
FADE OUT:
Folks i've said it before.. You just can't make this shit up.
Errr, but for you wanting to find dommes that can be broken.. this one is in play LOL....
About that link and other sites and profiles and give lessons as to how you can tell.. It always seems to center around the pictures.
However, this is something from a profile that gives another way you can tell..
"Some one asked me the other day:
1. Do you always want an explanation or specific details on what someone is doing?
2. and do you always analyze the answer for some hidden meaning
I said "I am a woman, what do you think?"
He didn't get it, so I had to explain.
"You can probably always tell a male pretending to be a woman online simply because he isn't wondering those two things""
Have you ever heard the phrase that women are not visual? It's not total bullcrap. I can't speak for ALL women but I can speak for myself when I say the idea of getting nude pictures of men and women isn't high on my list of priorities if I want to get to know them. Although I do like to see the photos of an exceptionally cute TV/CD. (Note, this is NOT an open invitation for you TV/CD types to start bombarding me with photos.. LOL)
It's defintely more of a guy thing. (There are always exceptions but as a general rule, it suffices) And what are these fake lesbians doing most often? Yep, the whole picture trading bit. (Send to receive is their manifesto.) Pictures of their chosen persona is their currency, their very lifeblood as it were.
When it's just that, these fake lesbians are mostly harmless. Seriously they are easy enough to spot. But there are some real people out there who are lesbian and the ones I know on CM want nothing more than to find someone they can be happy with. THAT is when all these fake lesbians become dangerous. They are going to start chatting with, and eventually sparks are going to happen and you all know how it's going to end... The fake is going to disappear or will be caught, leaving the real person hurt in their wake.
It's not exclusive to CM, however. That has gone on since Compuserve in the early/mid 80's. (Does the term Ci$ bring back memories for anyone? If so, let me know who you are.)
Anyyyyyyyyway.. I'm going to end this by pointing you toward a good profile.. I may make it a habit on the blog to do this.. hmmmm.. But give him a look.. His name is JakeSpeed and is a 40 dominant in Maryland.
Friday, January 21, 2011
This is the dawning of the Age of Ophiuchus ..
That doesn't even sound right..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N9oq_IskRIg
Yeah yeah, I get it.. the stars aren't aligned and all the charts had to be redone and all that shit... But do they realize just how badly they've fucked up the dating scene?
Oh come on, all those people who had their zodiac sign and used it as a pick up line..
"Hi there, i'm a Virgo with my Leo rising," says Mr. Cool. "So, uh what's your sign?"
"I'm an Ophicuchus," she says..
You see how fucked up that sounds?
Even worse are the people who would like to tell folks how they definitely displayed all the known traits of their sign.. How is that gonna play when they've had their sign changed to something else? That's a lot of egg on a lot of faces.
And Scorpio.. Man, Scorpio just plain got fucked in this deal. Scorpio definitely didn't have a good attorney in there fighting for its rights as a zodiac sign.
Hey rememeber when I said way back when that someone needed to message a certain peron and tell him 1977 wanted their clothes back? Someone must have done it. He viewed my profile and when I peeked at his profile, the cat is now wearing leather pants and an open jacket.. Good on ya, fella, good on ya...
Right, this one.. I just don't know what to say. I've been approached with some weird opening lines, But. well..
This is a message I got from a 32 lesbian submissive in Indiana..
"Dear Ultimate Domme,i dont mean to be rude but i want to eat your poop."
The message goes on to ask how much they would need to tribute to make that happen.
Uh yeah, umm.. You know maybe if this were someone I've like known for awhile it wouldn't be so bad. But I'm sitting here trying to figure out how or IF it's remotely possible to send the above to a stranger and NOT have it sound rude..
Sooooooo.. I send back a message that said, "You know, "hello, how are you" would have done quite nicely."
Great, so she sends another message that says that.. And then goes on to repeat the poop eating bit.. *smirk* Uh yeah.. I was like, "Get away from me!!"
Sheeeeh.. Got to be one of those crazy motherfuckers. No, come to think of it, even if it's someone i've known a long time I don't believe I want them to voice this particular desire.
Just when I am starting to think things are started to get stale someone from my past popped up to cross my path again.. When I first began an individual called Cabbagesub stole his way into my family and made off with a collar.. When Chuck decided to move back to his Parent's basement to play WoW and eat a lot of cheetos, the Cabbagesub also disappeared... Hmmm..
But he's back, and his profile and journals are still hilarious... Here are a couple of them for you.
"1/7/2011 6:58:31 AM:
This site has done everything to improve. New fonts, chatrooms, blocking options. It's not their fault most of you suck"
Hey HE said it.. not me.. LOL
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TLlPTyzgeQU&feature=related <-- speaking of sucking.
"1/7/2011 6:16:55
I am once again selling my used tighty whities. Contact me for pricing details..........."
You gotta love it! Oh yes, he now has a new photo on his profile that shows what a cabbagesub looks like after "being used" by UltimateDomme... You gotta check him out.. And don't forget to send props for the humor.
I've never seen this one before, and when I saw it I nearly fell out of my chair laughing. It's definitely one of the more umm.. simple and accurate definitons i've seen. This is from the profile of an 18 female switch in Michigan..
""A slave cleans your boots until you say they are done. A submissive cleans your boots until they think they are done. A bottom says "clean your own damn boots now beat me!""
Here's a 46 female switch from Australia.. Uhhh
"Here seeking a Gorean Master (non bdsm), must be strict, real life and not into online play.
Some around know me as a Free Woman & have been active within the bdsm world for approx 4 years.
To me Gor and BDSM are two seperate lifestyles, Gor to me is a way of life and BDSM is a form of entertainment."
*blank stare*
No, i'm saying nothing else..
All right.. Here's another of those people who has a profile on CM to do what..? Heh.. check it out.. This is a 52 dominant in New Mexico.
"This place is seriously a joke. Want to know why it's a joke? Because too many on this site are a joke. There's a few real people. They live this Life, as they can, to varying degrees. But on the whole, it's a bunch of wannabes. Both from dom and sub side alike. Subs thinking their pussy's are gold. Dom's thinking they have to chase the pussy. Hmmmm, sounds like nilla to me. Buncha folks just livin this in their heads. Bunch of fuckin players. Who play act this Life."
Now, this profile goes on and it's more of the same, he goes on about how it was "back in the day" and how subs knew their place and doms didn't have to "chase the pussy".. He speaks of certain traits a dominant has so and so forth..
But he's missed the point on something... Now i'm sure in his righteous anger it just slipped his mind.. But he seems to have missed the point that a trait of a dominant does NOT have to be that he's an asshole.
Here's one more quote from the same profile.
"And (some of) the girls LOL they're a joke too. All these "no limit" slaves running around. Or the girls that complain because a dominant was dominant to them. Well no shit honey. This ain't nilla no more. you come on a site with a bunch of Doms and then act surprised and indignant that they would try to dominate you in the first mail? Oh gimme a break. Like I said, bunch of fuckin wannabes."
I have a question for this guy.. and anyone else who would care to answer it..
Would you really want a sub or a slave that CAN be had in the first email? I know I sure wouldn't, but that's just me.
Now, here's a journal entry from this guy..
"ya know. It amazes me. It's very simple really. However, perhaps that's why it escapes so many. Once a girl agrees to serve whomever, her decision making process for that relationship dynamic is done. because from that point, it's hers to serve. not direct. not decree. not "allow". it's hers to serve at the direction and pleasure of her Owner. Simple."
On it's own, i'd even agree with this journal entry. But what would you imagine would be needed before a couple reaches the point where she makes that decision to serve?
Well.... TIME for one. She's going to have to know what she's getting herself into and if she's at all sane it's NOT going to happen quickly. She's going to have to be assured that the dominant actually knows what he's doing and isn't just a shit talker with a god complex.
Oh yes! Don't you for a moment lose track of the fact the vast majority of you people who rant about these things very likely would do the D/s scene as a whole a great favor to stay the fuck away from it.
Do you want to know who the REAL doms are on CM? They are the ones who do not feel the need to brag about what they are capable of or any of that shit. They will approach you with a profile that seems very mild and he will approach you in a very neutral, "I want to get to know you" way.
Don't discount him because he's not coming on like gangbusters right out of the gate. He won't have to tell you that he's a dominant. Ya see, a real "leader" is followed because those who follow them WANT to do so.
A submissive woman does not need you to tell them you're a good dominant, not at all... She needs you to SHOW her.
Ah fuck, I done went and got serious... Let me find a funny to end this with....
Here's something.. I actually got a message from one of the fake lesbians i've mentioned here.. This one's profile said that it has come to her attention that someone was trashing her name and wanted to opportunity to defend herself, and apparently someone told her.
I think that's quite fair and when she messaged me I replied that I would be happy to post any rebuttal or defense she wished to make unedited on this blog.
Ummm, it's been two days since she read that offer and has yet to respond so I don't have high hopes at this point.. I wonder if that's because in my reply I ended it by saying..
"I've give you this though, you're the first fake lesbian to actually have the nuts to say something to me, props to you on that."
That doesn't even sound right..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N9oq_IskRIg
Yeah yeah, I get it.. the stars aren't aligned and all the charts had to be redone and all that shit... But do they realize just how badly they've fucked up the dating scene?
Oh come on, all those people who had their zodiac sign and used it as a pick up line..
"Hi there, i'm a Virgo with my Leo rising," says Mr. Cool. "So, uh what's your sign?"
"I'm an Ophicuchus," she says..
You see how fucked up that sounds?
Even worse are the people who would like to tell folks how they definitely displayed all the known traits of their sign.. How is that gonna play when they've had their sign changed to something else? That's a lot of egg on a lot of faces.
And Scorpio.. Man, Scorpio just plain got fucked in this deal. Scorpio definitely didn't have a good attorney in there fighting for its rights as a zodiac sign.
Hey rememeber when I said way back when that someone needed to message a certain peron and tell him 1977 wanted their clothes back? Someone must have done it. He viewed my profile and when I peeked at his profile, the cat is now wearing leather pants and an open jacket.. Good on ya, fella, good on ya...
Right, this one.. I just don't know what to say. I've been approached with some weird opening lines, But. well..
This is a message I got from a 32 lesbian submissive in Indiana..
"Dear Ultimate Domme,i dont mean to be rude but i want to eat your poop."
The message goes on to ask how much they would need to tribute to make that happen.
Uh yeah, umm.. You know maybe if this were someone I've like known for awhile it wouldn't be so bad. But I'm sitting here trying to figure out how or IF it's remotely possible to send the above to a stranger and NOT have it sound rude..
Sooooooo.. I send back a message that said, "You know, "hello, how are you" would have done quite nicely."
Great, so she sends another message that says that.. And then goes on to repeat the poop eating bit.. *smirk* Uh yeah.. I was like, "Get away from me!!"
Sheeeeh.. Got to be one of those crazy motherfuckers. No, come to think of it, even if it's someone i've known a long time I don't believe I want them to voice this particular desire.
Just when I am starting to think things are started to get stale someone from my past popped up to cross my path again.. When I first began an individual called Cabbagesub stole his way into my family and made off with a collar.. When Chuck decided to move back to his Parent's basement to play WoW and eat a lot of cheetos, the Cabbagesub also disappeared... Hmmm..
But he's back, and his profile and journals are still hilarious... Here are a couple of them for you.
"1/7/2011 6:58:31 AM:
This site has done everything to improve. New fonts, chatrooms, blocking options. It's not their fault most of you suck"
Hey HE said it.. not me.. LOL
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TLlPTyzgeQU&feature=related <-- speaking of sucking.
"1/7/2011 6:16:55
I am once again selling my used tighty whities. Contact me for pricing details..........."
You gotta love it! Oh yes, he now has a new photo on his profile that shows what a cabbagesub looks like after "being used" by UltimateDomme... You gotta check him out.. And don't forget to send props for the humor.
I've never seen this one before, and when I saw it I nearly fell out of my chair laughing. It's definitely one of the more umm.. simple and accurate definitons i've seen. This is from the profile of an 18 female switch in Michigan..
""A slave cleans your boots until you say they are done. A submissive cleans your boots until they think they are done. A bottom says "clean your own damn boots now beat me!""
Here's a 46 female switch from Australia.. Uhhh
"Here seeking a Gorean Master (non bdsm), must be strict, real life and not into online play.
Some around know me as a Free Woman & have been active within the bdsm world for approx 4 years.
To me Gor and BDSM are two seperate lifestyles, Gor to me is a way of life and BDSM is a form of entertainment."
*blank stare*
No, i'm saying nothing else..
All right.. Here's another of those people who has a profile on CM to do what..? Heh.. check it out.. This is a 52 dominant in New Mexico.
"This place is seriously a joke. Want to know why it's a joke? Because too many on this site are a joke. There's a few real people. They live this Life, as they can, to varying degrees. But on the whole, it's a bunch of wannabes. Both from dom and sub side alike. Subs thinking their pussy's are gold. Dom's thinking they have to chase the pussy. Hmmmm, sounds like nilla to me. Buncha folks just livin this in their heads. Bunch of fuckin players. Who play act this Life."
Now, this profile goes on and it's more of the same, he goes on about how it was "back in the day" and how subs knew their place and doms didn't have to "chase the pussy".. He speaks of certain traits a dominant has so and so forth..
But he's missed the point on something... Now i'm sure in his righteous anger it just slipped his mind.. But he seems to have missed the point that a trait of a dominant does NOT have to be that he's an asshole.
Here's one more quote from the same profile.
"And (some of) the girls LOL they're a joke too. All these "no limit" slaves running around. Or the girls that complain because a dominant was dominant to them. Well no shit honey. This ain't nilla no more. you come on a site with a bunch of Doms and then act surprised and indignant that they would try to dominate you in the first mail? Oh gimme a break. Like I said, bunch of fuckin wannabes."
I have a question for this guy.. and anyone else who would care to answer it..
Would you really want a sub or a slave that CAN be had in the first email? I know I sure wouldn't, but that's just me.
Now, here's a journal entry from this guy..
"ya know. It amazes me. It's very simple really. However, perhaps that's why it escapes so many. Once a girl agrees to serve whomever, her decision making process for that relationship dynamic is done. because from that point, it's hers to serve. not direct. not decree. not "allow". it's hers to serve at the direction and pleasure of her Owner. Simple."
On it's own, i'd even agree with this journal entry. But what would you imagine would be needed before a couple reaches the point where she makes that decision to serve?
Well.... TIME for one. She's going to have to know what she's getting herself into and if she's at all sane it's NOT going to happen quickly. She's going to have to be assured that the dominant actually knows what he's doing and isn't just a shit talker with a god complex.
Oh yes! Don't you for a moment lose track of the fact the vast majority of you people who rant about these things very likely would do the D/s scene as a whole a great favor to stay the fuck away from it.
Do you want to know who the REAL doms are on CM? They are the ones who do not feel the need to brag about what they are capable of or any of that shit. They will approach you with a profile that seems very mild and he will approach you in a very neutral, "I want to get to know you" way.
Don't discount him because he's not coming on like gangbusters right out of the gate. He won't have to tell you that he's a dominant. Ya see, a real "leader" is followed because those who follow them WANT to do so.
A submissive woman does not need you to tell them you're a good dominant, not at all... She needs you to SHOW her.
Ah fuck, I done went and got serious... Let me find a funny to end this with....
Here's something.. I actually got a message from one of the fake lesbians i've mentioned here.. This one's profile said that it has come to her attention that someone was trashing her name and wanted to opportunity to defend herself, and apparently someone told her.
I think that's quite fair and when she messaged me I replied that I would be happy to post any rebuttal or defense she wished to make unedited on this blog.
Ummm, it's been two days since she read that offer and has yet to respond so I don't have high hopes at this point.. I wonder if that's because in my reply I ended it by saying..
"I've give you this though, you're the first fake lesbian to actually have the nuts to say something to me, props to you on that."
Monday, January 17, 2011
I'VE BEEN FOUND!!!!! (confetti flies and pyro goes off)
Ahhhh.. here's a quick little update..
I have FINALLY been found.. It's always been my intention to lift the veil and reveal the real bitch behind the UltimateDomme...
Note, I do not intend to delete the UltimateDomme profile and the blog is NOT going to cease... but the real person behind UltimateDomme issssssss...
MstressAriel
Ariel.. the mermaid.. Disney? get it? *giggle*
There will be a couple of photos on my real name to confirm this.
I have FINALLY been found.. It's always been my intention to lift the veil and reveal the real bitch behind the UltimateDomme...
Note, I do not intend to delete the UltimateDomme profile and the blog is NOT going to cease... but the real person behind UltimateDomme issssssss...
MstressAriel
Ariel.. the mermaid.. Disney? get it? *giggle*
There will be a couple of photos on my real name to confirm this.
Crankage!
Yes, I can definitely see me posting more often and posting somewhat shorter entries. I've gotten more than one message telling me my blog is starting to look like a novel.. But i've got to keep the lulz coming... Well, I dont HAVE to... But I wanna.
Hmm, have ya ever noticed that when you buy something from an online merchant there's always a little advertisement that says something to the effect that other people who bought this item ALSO bought this, this, and that?
Yeah, i've found that on CM too.. (No, i'm lying.. I had this pointed out to me.).. Hehehhe
This is a 53 dominant in Florida and he's got a rather specialized profile..
"The hu- cow and the pigslut slave.
Females only at this time.I have had way to many males contact me.
Body?Modification.?
Oh, yes I could use a farmers daughter.Or daughters to over see the livestock.
?and make daddy happy."
Okay then.. As I said, rather specialized profile.. HOWEVER, just in case you're interested in something else... Wellllllll here's one of his journals.
"If you are of a different kink.
You might want to visit a friend of mine here on Collar me...
Xxxxxxxx .Looking for the sissy bitches and females slaves that are not into barn yard play."
Now, when you look up this cat's name.. It leads to a 46 Domianant also in Florida..
" would like to find a male that is into fetish and dressing.That I can form a relationship with.
A couple would also be nice.If you are a?natural?born female and consider yourself a fetishist and female crossdresser,which means you would dress and live like the males want to here.Then we should talk."
Oh wait... I'm just getting started!. Back to the original profile..
"For those looking for a daddy Xxxxxxxxxxx .As far as I know"No age play"not sure though ask him.
For those that are really serious and want to be owned then Xxxxxxxxx would be your best choice."
Right then.. The first one is a 51 dominant in guess where? Yep, Florida.. And the profile is for those who are looking for a daddy.
If you go to the next profile you go to the profile of a 54 dominant in Florida..
Now, along with the typical, "this is what I seek" this cat lists that wonderfully well distributed over the internet "9 levels of submission"..
Now, let's tie it all up in one neat little package.... All four of these profiles are written in the same style. What I mean is, they are all the same person. All four profiles have journals and they follow a definite pattern, if you find the first one.. (There's a Hucow on his profile pic) you'll find the others and you'll see what I mean.
This dude is doing his damndest to cover as many bases as possible.. I'll just bet if one were to keep up and watch the original profile, you're going to find more names in there with other specialized kinks.. and i'm pretttyyyyyyyyy sure those new names are going to be 50ish dominants in Florida... Just a guess, mind you.
Viagra made me snicker when they did terrible things to Elvis' song, "Viva Las Vegas"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MFw5a5Bp_Pw <--- The Real Deal.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NyMXahpRVV4 <--- The Viagra song.
The latest ones are that guy with the overheated car. You know the one, he stops at the store to buy a bottle of water, pours a little into his radiator and off he goes.. They are playing a real catchy blues rift in this commercial..
It's the song, "Smokestack Lightning" from the great Howling Wolf..
Now, THIS is an appropriate song for Viagra.."Whoa ohhhhh!.. Smokestack lightning!!"
Other appropriate songs come to mind as well.. Back in the Saddle by Gene Autry.. Hmmm, this could get sick.
Also those Viagra commercials are proof positive that men cannot think straight when they get a woody.. Oh come on, why else would a 4 hour erection be cause for medical attention? (No, I know it's actually dangerous) Of course if he's real lucky his wife/girlfriend isn't about to let him go to the hospital that quickly.. I mean if he's taking it there MUST be a reason.
"Oh hell no you ain't going to no emergency room yet.. Get your ass back on this bed..."
Vivaaaaaaaa.. Vivvvaaaaaaaaaa.. Eh, not gonna say it.
This next bit is a 23 submissive in Georgia.. And I tell ya, she rips the people who do something specific to ribbons in her journals... Check it out..
"Apparently my journal entry where I state a few things that irritate me ruffled a feather or two.
The fact that I don't like people who don't have a mind of their own and simply follow another person or groups actions offends you? Great! Although I hope you realize that says much more about you than it does about me.
If you really think capitalization, random pet names from assholes you don't know, and speaking in third person all the time is what "this lifestyle", as you put it, is all about? You really need to do some soulsearching - or at least a little discussing/reading.
And as for calling me a newbie bitch who "makes you fucking puke" just because some Lord Master DomlyDom from the WhoGivesaHell Clan or House trained YOU a certain way in order to make you a twue submissive or slave is beyond....gawd.. Honestly, it's just way out there - but thank you Guru of BDSM for putting me in my place."
Find this profile and give it a good look.. If you dare.. LOL
When I changed my profile back to dominant I started getting more hits on it from subs, okay.. But um, along with that the fake lesbians have been on me like stink on shit.. I've managed to make the profile of a guy who uses the name subbeth0019. It seems that he believes i'm fake and and he will be reporting me to the "watch group" Oh noeessssssssssss..This came about after getting several messages from him that I did not reply to. You know, the typical I want you shit.
Eh, this one I simply can't resist. I ran his picture through that tineye thingie and you'll NEVER guess what I found.
http://www.tineye.com/search/b7ca3cf70b7122df21f27b5f01538a3acc8ff2a9/
Oh SNAP! So I send subbeth0019 that link and ask why HE is using a fake pic..
"To: subbeth0019
Dated:
1/16/11 7:15 PM
check that link.. your picture is ALL over the internet..."
The reply I got is comedy gold.
"From: subbeth0019
Dated:
1/16/11 7:15 PM
i have my real but i wioll not post them on this site"
Well THERE'S a fucking surprise.
And when I pointed out that only a minute before he claimed he was not using a fake pic, I got blocked. Ain't that the damndest thing you ever heard?
Now, as a point of interest that profile quickly went into either hidden or deleted mode. *giggle*
Come ON people.. If you want to have a go at me, you really ought to do more than look at the picture and try looking at those little things on the right that are called, "words" If you take a few moments, (Okay, I admit it takes longer than a few moments to read my profile and blog.) those "words" form sentences.. Words have meaning and when you take them all together you will have become an enlightened individual having had a reading experience.
Now, I said this way back on my 2nd entry... If you come to me and show me just how stupid you are, Yes...I'm going to make fun of you.
Okay, I really DO want to be found on my real identity... So here's another clue... Go back to the original clue where I say my name suggests I live IN the water but the truth is I live in a state that has two major bodies of water on the coastline.
Have it? Good, Good... Now... Think DISNEY....(For the name AND the place) Edit: I'm NOT in Orlando..
FIND ME DAMMIT!!!! Heh.. See ya soon.
Hmm, have ya ever noticed that when you buy something from an online merchant there's always a little advertisement that says something to the effect that other people who bought this item ALSO bought this, this, and that?
Yeah, i've found that on CM too.. (No, i'm lying.. I had this pointed out to me.).. Hehehhe
This is a 53 dominant in Florida and he's got a rather specialized profile..
"The hu- cow and the pigslut slave.
Females only at this time.I have had way to many males contact me.
Body?Modification.?
Oh, yes I could use a farmers daughter.Or daughters to over see the livestock.
?and make daddy happy."
Okay then.. As I said, rather specialized profile.. HOWEVER, just in case you're interested in something else... Wellllllll here's one of his journals.
"If you are of a different kink.
You might want to visit a friend of mine here on Collar me...
Xxxxxxxx .Looking for the sissy bitches and females slaves that are not into barn yard play."
Now, when you look up this cat's name.. It leads to a 46 Domianant also in Florida..
" would like to find a male that is into fetish and dressing.That I can form a relationship with.
A couple would also be nice.If you are a?natural?born female and consider yourself a fetishist and female crossdresser,which means you would dress and live like the males want to here.Then we should talk."
Oh wait... I'm just getting started!. Back to the original profile..
"For those looking for a daddy Xxxxxxxxxxx .As far as I know"No age play"not sure though ask him.
For those that are really serious and want to be owned then Xxxxxxxxx would be your best choice."
Right then.. The first one is a 51 dominant in guess where? Yep, Florida.. And the profile is for those who are looking for a daddy.
If you go to the next profile you go to the profile of a 54 dominant in Florida..
Now, along with the typical, "this is what I seek" this cat lists that wonderfully well distributed over the internet "9 levels of submission"..
Now, let's tie it all up in one neat little package.... All four of these profiles are written in the same style. What I mean is, they are all the same person. All four profiles have journals and they follow a definite pattern, if you find the first one.. (There's a Hucow on his profile pic) you'll find the others and you'll see what I mean.
This dude is doing his damndest to cover as many bases as possible.. I'll just bet if one were to keep up and watch the original profile, you're going to find more names in there with other specialized kinks.. and i'm pretttyyyyyyyyy sure those new names are going to be 50ish dominants in Florida... Just a guess, mind you.
Viagra made me snicker when they did terrible things to Elvis' song, "Viva Las Vegas"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MFw5a5Bp_Pw <--- The Real Deal.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NyMXahpRVV4 <--- The Viagra song.
The latest ones are that guy with the overheated car. You know the one, he stops at the store to buy a bottle of water, pours a little into his radiator and off he goes.. They are playing a real catchy blues rift in this commercial..
It's the song, "Smokestack Lightning" from the great Howling Wolf..
Now, THIS is an appropriate song for Viagra.."Whoa ohhhhh!.. Smokestack lightning!!"
Other appropriate songs come to mind as well.. Back in the Saddle by Gene Autry.. Hmmm, this could get sick.
Also those Viagra commercials are proof positive that men cannot think straight when they get a woody.. Oh come on, why else would a 4 hour erection be cause for medical attention? (No, I know it's actually dangerous) Of course if he's real lucky his wife/girlfriend isn't about to let him go to the hospital that quickly.. I mean if he's taking it there MUST be a reason.
"Oh hell no you ain't going to no emergency room yet.. Get your ass back on this bed..."
Vivaaaaaaaa.. Vivvvaaaaaaaaaa.. Eh, not gonna say it.
This next bit is a 23 submissive in Georgia.. And I tell ya, she rips the people who do something specific to ribbons in her journals... Check it out..
"Apparently my journal entry where I state a few things that irritate me ruffled a feather or two.
The fact that I don't like people who don't have a mind of their own and simply follow another person or groups actions offends you? Great! Although I hope you realize that says much more about you than it does about me.
If you really think capitalization, random pet names from assholes you don't know, and speaking in third person all the time is what "this lifestyle", as you put it, is all about? You really need to do some soulsearching - or at least a little discussing/reading.
And as for calling me a newbie bitch who "makes you fucking puke" just because some Lord Master DomlyDom from the WhoGivesaHell Clan or House trained YOU a certain way in order to make you a twue submissive or slave is beyond....gawd.. Honestly, it's just way out there - but thank you Guru of BDSM for putting me in my place."
Find this profile and give it a good look.. If you dare.. LOL
When I changed my profile back to dominant I started getting more hits on it from subs, okay.. But um, along with that the fake lesbians have been on me like stink on shit.. I've managed to make the profile of a guy who uses the name subbeth0019. It seems that he believes i'm fake and and he will be reporting me to the "watch group" Oh noeessssssssssss..This came about after getting several messages from him that I did not reply to. You know, the typical I want you shit.
Eh, this one I simply can't resist. I ran his picture through that tineye thingie and you'll NEVER guess what I found.
http://www.tineye.com/search/b7ca3cf70b7122df21f27b5f01538a3acc8ff2a9/
Oh SNAP! So I send subbeth0019 that link and ask why HE is using a fake pic..
"To: subbeth0019
Dated:
1/16/11 7:15 PM
check that link.. your picture is ALL over the internet..."
The reply I got is comedy gold.
"From: subbeth0019
Dated:
1/16/11 7:15 PM
i have my real but i wioll not post them on this site"
Well THERE'S a fucking surprise.
And when I pointed out that only a minute before he claimed he was not using a fake pic, I got blocked. Ain't that the damndest thing you ever heard?
Now, as a point of interest that profile quickly went into either hidden or deleted mode. *giggle*
Come ON people.. If you want to have a go at me, you really ought to do more than look at the picture and try looking at those little things on the right that are called, "words" If you take a few moments, (Okay, I admit it takes longer than a few moments to read my profile and blog.) those "words" form sentences.. Words have meaning and when you take them all together you will have become an enlightened individual having had a reading experience.
Now, I said this way back on my 2nd entry... If you come to me and show me just how stupid you are, Yes...I'm going to make fun of you.
Okay, I really DO want to be found on my real identity... So here's another clue... Go back to the original clue where I say my name suggests I live IN the water but the truth is I live in a state that has two major bodies of water on the coastline.
Have it? Good, Good... Now... Think DISNEY....(For the name AND the place) Edit: I'm NOT in Orlando..
FIND ME DAMMIT!!!! Heh.. See ya soon.
Saturday, January 15, 2011
Hewwo again.
Yeah, my profile on CM has changed a litte.. It is what it is.. :-P
And the title of this sermon tonight will be....
We have beat our swords in the plowshares.... and the beat goes on... uh ... uh... uh...
Oh hey, someone messaged me quoting lyrics from that Sweet Charity scene and it's on my mind.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=97GzBd92kWk
Yes the Rhythm of Life is a POWERFUL beat!! Preach on Sammy!!
Right then, *smirk* This is a 38 dominant 34 submissive couple in Mississippi..
"We are Master Xxxxx and slave Xxxxxx . We are seeking to add to our house . We are seeking 2 to 3 slaves to be here serve me . This is a house filled with love and no drama . You will be a bre*ding slave"
That's just the first couple of lines of the profile. It says a bit more but the above is the part I want to talk about.
Breeding slaves.. Yeah okay, when I see profiles of someone looking for breeders I instantly start to wonder what is going to happen to all the kids these breeders are going to be cranking out? My warped mind leaps to two possible answers.. Someone wants to start their own cult, or these kids are going to end up on the baby black market... Hmmm, or a ton of tax deductions.
I've gotten some realllll interesting messages over the past few days..
There was a 39 male slave in Alabama who wanted to give me the honor of watching him self castrate.. Hmmm, speaking of those bits you can only pull off once, eh? When I told him I was going to take a pass on it he told me that it would be taking place on cam at a specific time (Looks at watch.. ack, too late.. oops.).. I'm gonna have to keep an eye on this profile and see if he tries to do the trick a second time.
Oh, he damn well BETTER not... It's not fair to advertise a damned self castration and not deliver, wouldn't you agree?.. You hear that? If I see you later on and you still got nuts, you're in biggggggggggggggggggg trouble.. Harumph!
And a 51 dominant in Panama messaged me and seemed to think the bitch is not a domme, based on the picture of course. *eyeroll* I cracked my knuckles after reading his profile and proceeded to rip him a new one and got myself blocked *sniff*
Read this profile and see if you can guess what I told this fucker.
"retired rich dom looking for pretty, curvy, horny,eager young slaves (ages between 18-35).
i need real slaves with no other desire but long-term hard, strict and quiet limitless slavery serving me 24/7. looking for the typical blonde busty bimbo ready to just do as told, look good and obey with no complains.
i offer place to live, food, clothe (if and when needed) take care of absolutly everything as a real master and owner does.
slaves must be ables to relocate here to panama, be 18+ and send 3 costum pics to proof she is real, ofcourse send 2 pics with first message in order to be considered for this.
yes this is for poly house/harem purpose, so if not into it dont bother me."
Let's see.. did I message him and thank him for his constructive comments in a sweet, polite manner? Is that what you guessed?
No? Did I message this clown and tell him that judging from his profile he's a typical internet player who likely has never had a willing submissive in his life? Did you guess that? Bingo!
Well, he did admit that he at least was looking for real slaves.. Well fuck, they're ALL looking for real slaves, what makes you any different from the next goofball who talks a lot of shit?
Seriosuly I get the biggest laughs out of those who read my profile and take the damn thing seriously. Of course to a person, every single one of them who have messaged me taking my profile seriously have had some quite out of this world profiles of their own.. The difference is they're serious, which in my mind makes it even more lulzworthy.
Yeah, so on we go... This is a 59 submissive in Tennessee
"UNDER CONSIDERATION
i/We are in training together for me to be Sir's very Special whore"
Right, most often this profile just goes unnoticed because it's unremarkable in it's content.
However my friends, this profile has been like this for at LEAST a year... Meaning this person has been under consideration for at least that long. Something tells me this person ain't ever gonna get collared, not by this guy who's had her "under consideration" for at least a year.
Under consideration.. what exactly does that mean to a dominant you puts someone in that position? Ahh, you already know the answer to this one, but yes yes.. it means that while he takes his time and puts you through all sorts of "tests".. He's free to do whatever he pleases because of course he is the dominant.
Seriously, what's to consider here? I mean how much time does it take for one to decide whether or not someone is the one for you? Someone here is gettin' gamed, that's for sure.
Right then, this next one is from the, "I have been hurt and now i'm gonna make someone else pay for that" files.. A 24 dominant in Virginia and here's his latest journal.
"People ask why are u suck a bitch to wmen or why you a dick to a guy. I now think its because it happens cuz they got fucked over to many times by other people. My heart has been removed and was replaced with coal. No love just pain feom here and getting what I want"
Now, I THINK that's supposed to read, "People ask why you are such a bitch to women or why you're a dick to men." I say that, because if you suck a bitch right, you won't be getting your heart broken nope nope.. Ah, nevermind..
Anyway, somehow, somewhere, someone has broken his heart and now its.....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Hxm6cM6R_Y
Oh my YES! Work that crop Alice!!!
Oh right, our hero... Lighten the fuck up little trooper, someone will come along and not break your heart. 24 is too young for that whole heart of coal bullshit..
Uh huh.. Onward... This is a very amusing exchange I had on my real profile.. Warning, i'm a sarcastic bitch for realz too.
ANYWAYYYYYYYY.. I get a message from a 47 female slave in New York. I don't have the message but it was a one liner that asked if I were interested in spanking her. Now, I answered this with all the seriousness it deserved.
"LOL, Yeah sure. The next time you're in Xxxxxxxx, XX (What, you thought you were gonna get another clue? Well maybe it IS one, the city has that many letters.) drop me a line."
I didn't think I would be hearing from this person again.. Boy, was I wrong!
"why you laughing asshole. i am in your pathetic white trash state often on business" <--- This could be another clue.
Now, I sat here drumming my fingernails on the desk and wondered how and IF I would respond to this one. I eventually opted for the honest approach.
"Because messaging a stranger asking them if they are interested in spanking you is fucking funny, that's why. Now go stand in the corner of the internet and think about it. :-P"
Apparently, she didn't get the humor..
"go fuck yourself you dumb bitch. you're the white trash i speak of. after talking to you i need a shower"
Right... Right.. This, coming from someone whose profile says.....
"I am 47, divorced and very bi. Seek a strict female to serve as a domestic slave, seek rules, structure, accountability, and discipline"
Did I not give her exactly what she says she wanted huh, huh? You would THINK after I took the time to perscribe discipline for her she'd at least be appreciative, but nooooooooooooooo.. She sends the above..
Oh not to worry, I replied quite calmly to her.
"Hmm, you're the one approaching strangers and I'm the dumb bitch. There's irony for you. Anyway, I hope you can get that smell from your upper lip, miss sunshine. And work out those anger issues, for fuck's sake."
It's been a couple of days since she's been on to read that reply.. But I can't wait to see what she has to say next... I predict a long and beneficial relationship will come from this..
Heh, yeah believe that shit...
Ah, i've been thinking i'd prefer to post more often and post these shorter entries rather than holding myself to that monday deadline and driving myself crazy trying to get them out. So.. I'll be back with more whenever.
And the title of this sermon tonight will be....
We have beat our swords in the plowshares.... and the beat goes on... uh ... uh... uh...
Oh hey, someone messaged me quoting lyrics from that Sweet Charity scene and it's on my mind.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=97GzBd92kWk
Yes the Rhythm of Life is a POWERFUL beat!! Preach on Sammy!!
Right then, *smirk* This is a 38 dominant 34 submissive couple in Mississippi..
"We are Master Xxxxx and slave Xxxxxx . We are seeking to add to our house . We are seeking 2 to 3 slaves to be here serve me . This is a house filled with love and no drama . You will be a bre*ding slave"
That's just the first couple of lines of the profile. It says a bit more but the above is the part I want to talk about.
Breeding slaves.. Yeah okay, when I see profiles of someone looking for breeders I instantly start to wonder what is going to happen to all the kids these breeders are going to be cranking out? My warped mind leaps to two possible answers.. Someone wants to start their own cult, or these kids are going to end up on the baby black market... Hmmm, or a ton of tax deductions.
I've gotten some realllll interesting messages over the past few days..
There was a 39 male slave in Alabama who wanted to give me the honor of watching him self castrate.. Hmmm, speaking of those bits you can only pull off once, eh? When I told him I was going to take a pass on it he told me that it would be taking place on cam at a specific time (Looks at watch.. ack, too late.. oops.).. I'm gonna have to keep an eye on this profile and see if he tries to do the trick a second time.
Oh, he damn well BETTER not... It's not fair to advertise a damned self castration and not deliver, wouldn't you agree?.. You hear that? If I see you later on and you still got nuts, you're in biggggggggggggggggggg trouble.. Harumph!
And a 51 dominant in Panama messaged me and seemed to think the bitch is not a domme, based on the picture of course. *eyeroll* I cracked my knuckles after reading his profile and proceeded to rip him a new one and got myself blocked *sniff*
Read this profile and see if you can guess what I told this fucker.
"retired rich dom looking for pretty, curvy, horny,eager young slaves (ages between 18-35).
i need real slaves with no other desire but long-term hard, strict and quiet limitless slavery serving me 24/7. looking for the typical blonde busty bimbo ready to just do as told, look good and obey with no complains.
i offer place to live, food, clothe (if and when needed) take care of absolutly everything as a real master and owner does.
slaves must be ables to relocate here to panama, be 18+ and send 3 costum pics to proof she is real, ofcourse send 2 pics with first message in order to be considered for this.
yes this is for poly house/harem purpose, so if not into it dont bother me."
Let's see.. did I message him and thank him for his constructive comments in a sweet, polite manner? Is that what you guessed?
No? Did I message this clown and tell him that judging from his profile he's a typical internet player who likely has never had a willing submissive in his life? Did you guess that? Bingo!
Well, he did admit that he at least was looking for real slaves.. Well fuck, they're ALL looking for real slaves, what makes you any different from the next goofball who talks a lot of shit?
Seriosuly I get the biggest laughs out of those who read my profile and take the damn thing seriously. Of course to a person, every single one of them who have messaged me taking my profile seriously have had some quite out of this world profiles of their own.. The difference is they're serious, which in my mind makes it even more lulzworthy.
Yeah, so on we go... This is a 59 submissive in Tennessee
"UNDER CONSIDERATION
i/We are in training together for me to be Sir's very Special whore"
Right, most often this profile just goes unnoticed because it's unremarkable in it's content.
However my friends, this profile has been like this for at LEAST a year... Meaning this person has been under consideration for at least that long. Something tells me this person ain't ever gonna get collared, not by this guy who's had her "under consideration" for at least a year.
Under consideration.. what exactly does that mean to a dominant you puts someone in that position? Ahh, you already know the answer to this one, but yes yes.. it means that while he takes his time and puts you through all sorts of "tests".. He's free to do whatever he pleases because of course he is the dominant.
Seriously, what's to consider here? I mean how much time does it take for one to decide whether or not someone is the one for you? Someone here is gettin' gamed, that's for sure.
Right then, this next one is from the, "I have been hurt and now i'm gonna make someone else pay for that" files.. A 24 dominant in Virginia and here's his latest journal.
"People ask why are u suck a bitch to wmen or why you a dick to a guy. I now think its because it happens cuz they got fucked over to many times by other people. My heart has been removed and was replaced with coal. No love just pain feom here and getting what I want"
Now, I THINK that's supposed to read, "People ask why you are such a bitch to women or why you're a dick to men." I say that, because if you suck a bitch right, you won't be getting your heart broken nope nope.. Ah, nevermind..
Anyway, somehow, somewhere, someone has broken his heart and now its.....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Hxm6cM6R_Y
Oh my YES! Work that crop Alice!!!
Oh right, our hero... Lighten the fuck up little trooper, someone will come along and not break your heart. 24 is too young for that whole heart of coal bullshit..
Uh huh.. Onward... This is a very amusing exchange I had on my real profile.. Warning, i'm a sarcastic bitch for realz too.
ANYWAYYYYYYYY.. I get a message from a 47 female slave in New York. I don't have the message but it was a one liner that asked if I were interested in spanking her. Now, I answered this with all the seriousness it deserved.
"LOL, Yeah sure. The next time you're in Xxxxxxxx, XX (What, you thought you were gonna get another clue? Well maybe it IS one, the city has that many letters.) drop me a line."
I didn't think I would be hearing from this person again.. Boy, was I wrong!
"why you laughing asshole. i am in your pathetic white trash state often on business" <--- This could be another clue.
Now, I sat here drumming my fingernails on the desk and wondered how and IF I would respond to this one. I eventually opted for the honest approach.
"Because messaging a stranger asking them if they are interested in spanking you is fucking funny, that's why. Now go stand in the corner of the internet and think about it. :-P"
Apparently, she didn't get the humor..
"go fuck yourself you dumb bitch. you're the white trash i speak of. after talking to you i need a shower"
Right... Right.. This, coming from someone whose profile says.....
"I am 47, divorced and very bi. Seek a strict female to serve as a domestic slave, seek rules, structure, accountability, and discipline"
Did I not give her exactly what she says she wanted huh, huh? You would THINK after I took the time to perscribe discipline for her she'd at least be appreciative, but nooooooooooooooo.. She sends the above..
Oh not to worry, I replied quite calmly to her.
"Hmm, you're the one approaching strangers and I'm the dumb bitch. There's irony for you. Anyway, I hope you can get that smell from your upper lip, miss sunshine. And work out those anger issues, for fuck's sake."
It's been a couple of days since she's been on to read that reply.. But I can't wait to see what she has to say next... I predict a long and beneficial relationship will come from this..
Heh, yeah believe that shit...
Ah, i've been thinking i'd prefer to post more often and post these shorter entries rather than holding myself to that monday deadline and driving myself crazy trying to get them out. So.. I'll be back with more whenever.
Monday, January 10, 2011
Heheh, betcha thought I wasn't coming back eh? Wellllllll.. For those who are wondering.. I've been working my way down that list I got from Santa and well, it took a bit longer than I expected. There was one place I went where the fella I was there to visit shouted, "Thank you Santa!" when he saw the paddle I was carrying and couldn't get his pants down fast enough.. Ah, well I ended up staying there a couple of days.. and ahh, nevermind the details...But he's a VERY naughty boy.
Oh, i've also gotten a message or three wondering what I was talking about when I mentioned golf on Yom Kippur. Let's see, Yom Kippur is the jewish day of atonement (One of the high holy days) and is spent in temple. Anyone of that faith who would play golf on that day would be very naughty indeed. Ah, it's not as funny if I have to explain the joke, eh but if you didn't get it the first time I guess it wasn't funny anyway. Nichevo.
I love that word, Nichevo. It's Russian and its English translation is something along the lines of, "There is nothing to be done about it" or something such as that.. OR, I suppose one can just say, "Whatever" and it kinda sorta means the same thing... Heh, Nichevo.
Right then, before I make that huge announcement of who I really am, I wish to post this disclaimer..
My intention when creating the UltimateDomme profile was simply to have some laughs by skewering some of the BDSM sacred cows, and generally have a bit of fun in the journals. The idea of a blog came along because I did not wish to violate any of CollarMe's rules for posting journals and it started to become clear to me I was getting close. (No, I never got a message from the admin of collarme telling me to cool it, I saw it quite on my own.)
So I created the blog where as I mention in the description I can take off the gloves and hit a little harder. I have no qualms about posting the name of someone for certain purposes, (Such as that SlaveTrasportCo dude)... And I make no apologies for doing so. As a point of interest, i've kept tabs on some of the profiles i've mentioned in a less than flattering way and there have been a significant amount of them who have changed their profile. Did they see this blog mayhap, or perhaps just realized how stupid they sound?
It was never my intention to deceive in any way. The profile I wrote for UltimateDomme is very clearly a joke and I as much as say right there that the picture isn't really me. It's really a little sad that there are those who did not see that the profile was a joke profile, but that's neither here nor there... Fuck, those are the ones I have the most fun with anyway LOL.
I never once led anyone on, and in fact anyone who tries to "get to know" UltimateDomme is simply told that beyond the profile and journal/blog.. she does not exist.
So you're wondering why i'd all of a sudden decide to remove the mask? Fuck I dunno really.. It's like KISS back in 1983..the whole idea of the makeup ran its course and they evolved.. Yeah, that worked out well for them seeing they decided, "Fuck it" after 12 years of being just another band and put the makeup back on lol.. Ahh, i'm off point..
Now with that said, the person behind the UltimateDomme profile is... (Drumroll)
I am XxxxxxxXxxxx... Hold the fuck up..... No one found me yet. Find me on collar me under my real name and then i'll tell all. I gave you all a pretty good clue. :-P
So then, off to the profiles.. This is from a 34 dominant in South Carolina..
"4: Any and all slaves will be living full time 24/7 subs to me. They will be used any way I see fit with the intent to make a profit from them without prostituting them. I may make them suck any or everyone on command, but this will be a free gift from me to my customers. If I know the customers well and trust them I might have my sub/slave fuck them as long as my dick is kept happy anytime and all times.
5:Any and all slaves will be given a schedule of when and how every day(as a minimum) they will be required to suck and fuck."
As a point of interest, this guy read my blog and sent me a message basically agreeing with much of what is on my blog *eyeroll* If he only knew!
If you find this profile you will find that above list is 10 points with a further 4 detailing punishments and the "demerit" system he works on.
This profile has it all.... With the exception of anything at all that would actually qualify this moron to BE what he claims to be. He includes two photos in his pictures that are of a "coat of arms" and from reading all that he has to say it's pretty clear he spent more time creating those drawings than he's ever had actually dominating a submissive... At least in person and not online.
Here's another.. sort of the same theme.. a 34 dominant in Texas
"Expect to be sore in your body and exhillarated in your heart and mind. Expect to be spanked and ravished often, and if you are lucky, impregnated. My requirements are simple. So pay close attention. I do not like repetition and punishments for disobedience are brutal.
I do NOT chat online with potential subs before I have your formal application. You do not get to ask to see the chairman of a company before applying for a job. So, why the disrespect here ? This is like a job ad. If you are serious, apply. I have about 10-15 respectful messages to go through any day. Which ones do you think I am going to spend my weekends on?"
This one goes on as well.. More of the same drivel.. Oh you've got to find and read this one.. He goes on to talk about his 9 1/2 incher.. Great stuff. The really funny part of this but is he says his monster cock isn't going to be the biggest thing going inside of you. I can only imagine what this guy has planned for some poor sub.
But guys seriously.. How many of you get 10-15 messages a day out of the blue from women seeking dominants?
This asshole posts a profile basically talking about how big his dick is, gives no information that would make you see him as anything but a misogynist, doesn't provide any sort of picture of himself, says he won't chat with anyone until he has your "formal application"... You see where this is going, eh?
You know, i'm not blind to the fact there are female subs and slaves out there that WOULD be attracted to a woman hater. It's just sad to me because the sort of people profiles like the above would attract are the sort of people that hate themselves, or have low self esteem. It's to me one of the dark sides of D/s-BDSM.
Over the past week or so i've gotten emails from someone who told me of becoming involved with a couple who were looking for a "beta" slave to join them. She told me that over the space of a few months they exchanged emails and did some chatting on Yahoo, and even talked on the phone some.
She planned a meeting with them and after said meeting was offered and she accepted a collar, after which she began to make the plans to move to be with her new master and sister slave.
This is when it all fell apart. When she moved, (This was explained to me as packing 25-30 large boxes and filling a U-haul truck, along with arranging a transfer where she worked.) she was greeted with the news the alpha slave was no longer in the picture.
Upon reflection, and reviewing some of the Yahoo chats, she discovered both of them used the same typing style and tended to use the same turns of a phrase... etc. I was told she spoke to the woman once on the phone but when she visited the first time the woman was not there but she didn't think anything of that because that was planned.
What I mean is the guy wanted to spend a little time with her alone to evaluate how he and she were together before the three of them interacted together.
It turned out the so called "alpha" was in fact his sister and had been coached as to what to say to her when they'd spoken on the phone. She found this out when the sister called the house one day and she answered and recognized the voice.... oops.
Lucklily for our hero her bridges were not burned behind her so she was able to extract herself from the situation without too much difficulty. She had to stay in that city because of her job but got away from the dishonest man without getting too hurt.
Well, this is really nothing new. How many couple profiles do you see on CM where there are no pictures at all of the couple together? Yes there are many REAL couples but how many more are just like the above? Just as many i'd guess. I'm sure scammers like this have other little tricks to fool someone but you have to believe this would be no different than fake lesbians insofar as when it comes to face to face it's going to fall apart.
This next profile I really like... This is a 25 dominant in the UK.. and well, here it is..
"Here's my offer:
You will live with me
You will get your own space, my basement, which is currently just another bedroom.
You will stay in there unless I wish to use you elsewhere
You will be my slave and will be used for sex, punishment, torture and basically anything I feel like!
When you aren't being used you will be chained in the basement. I will leave the tv down there as long as you're a good girl.
I won't do you any permanent damage and limits will be respected to an extent.
You will get one chance every 2 months to permanently leave this deal. In between those times if you change your mind - TOUGH.
Why do I want this?
Sex on tap 24/7. End of. It's just like having Broadband/Sky.
What do you get out of this?
If you love sex and BDSM, you'll get loads!
However, if you don't then you'll also get £12,000 sterling for 10 months work. That's about minimum wage. You don't have to pay rent/bills/tax. Think about it, it's a decent offer.
Why 10 months?
I want you out of the way by Christmas so my family can come over."
LOL why do I like this profile? I don't know really.. But this cat is honest in a really funny way. Sex on tap 24/7.. Hehehe. And that, "I want you out of the way by Christmas so my family can come over.".. Priceless.
Right fella, while you're keeping this slave/employee chained in the basement all day while you're at work just what do you think is going to happen if god forbid the house catches fire? I have a funny feeling when the fire investigators start poking about and find the charred remains of your little plaything and that chain they're going to start asking some uncomfortable questions... I have an even funnier feeling that they're not going to be buying your answers... And guess where your family will be visiting you at Christmas?
No really. Dude, unattended bondage? Very, VERY bad idea. If you really wanna do this you may need to make it to where the plaything is only chained up when you or someone else is actually home just in case. This is one of those times where I think it's a good idea to recommend some reading. SM 101.. Yeah, it's old but it just might do you some good.. Read it, learn it, live it.
I have my doubts that this cat would actually pay those 12,000 pounds.. But i'm gonna have to keep an eye on this profile just to see if and how this profile evolves.
Eh, not as much lulz as i'd like to go into one of my entries.. But it's been awhile since i've posted something and some of the natives are getting restless.
"Get on it woman!" is what I told just a few minutes ago :-P
Oh, i've also gotten a message or three wondering what I was talking about when I mentioned golf on Yom Kippur. Let's see, Yom Kippur is the jewish day of atonement (One of the high holy days) and is spent in temple. Anyone of that faith who would play golf on that day would be very naughty indeed. Ah, it's not as funny if I have to explain the joke, eh but if you didn't get it the first time I guess it wasn't funny anyway. Nichevo.
I love that word, Nichevo. It's Russian and its English translation is something along the lines of, "There is nothing to be done about it" or something such as that.. OR, I suppose one can just say, "Whatever" and it kinda sorta means the same thing... Heh, Nichevo.
Right then, before I make that huge announcement of who I really am, I wish to post this disclaimer..
My intention when creating the UltimateDomme profile was simply to have some laughs by skewering some of the BDSM sacred cows, and generally have a bit of fun in the journals. The idea of a blog came along because I did not wish to violate any of CollarMe's rules for posting journals and it started to become clear to me I was getting close. (No, I never got a message from the admin of collarme telling me to cool it, I saw it quite on my own.)
So I created the blog where as I mention in the description I can take off the gloves and hit a little harder. I have no qualms about posting the name of someone for certain purposes, (Such as that SlaveTrasportCo dude)... And I make no apologies for doing so. As a point of interest, i've kept tabs on some of the profiles i've mentioned in a less than flattering way and there have been a significant amount of them who have changed their profile. Did they see this blog mayhap, or perhaps just realized how stupid they sound?
It was never my intention to deceive in any way. The profile I wrote for UltimateDomme is very clearly a joke and I as much as say right there that the picture isn't really me. It's really a little sad that there are those who did not see that the profile was a joke profile, but that's neither here nor there... Fuck, those are the ones I have the most fun with anyway LOL.
I never once led anyone on, and in fact anyone who tries to "get to know" UltimateDomme is simply told that beyond the profile and journal/blog.. she does not exist.
So you're wondering why i'd all of a sudden decide to remove the mask? Fuck I dunno really.. It's like KISS back in 1983..the whole idea of the makeup ran its course and they evolved.. Yeah, that worked out well for them seeing they decided, "Fuck it" after 12 years of being just another band and put the makeup back on lol.. Ahh, i'm off point..
Now with that said, the person behind the UltimateDomme profile is... (Drumroll)
I am XxxxxxxXxxxx... Hold the fuck up..... No one found me yet. Find me on collar me under my real name and then i'll tell all. I gave you all a pretty good clue. :-P
So then, off to the profiles.. This is from a 34 dominant in South Carolina..
"4: Any and all slaves will be living full time 24/7 subs to me. They will be used any way I see fit with the intent to make a profit from them without prostituting them. I may make them suck any or everyone on command, but this will be a free gift from me to my customers. If I know the customers well and trust them I might have my sub/slave fuck them as long as my dick is kept happy anytime and all times.
5:Any and all slaves will be given a schedule of when and how every day(as a minimum) they will be required to suck and fuck."
As a point of interest, this guy read my blog and sent me a message basically agreeing with much of what is on my blog *eyeroll* If he only knew!
If you find this profile you will find that above list is 10 points with a further 4 detailing punishments and the "demerit" system he works on.
This profile has it all.... With the exception of anything at all that would actually qualify this moron to BE what he claims to be. He includes two photos in his pictures that are of a "coat of arms" and from reading all that he has to say it's pretty clear he spent more time creating those drawings than he's ever had actually dominating a submissive... At least in person and not online.
Here's another.. sort of the same theme.. a 34 dominant in Texas
"Expect to be sore in your body and exhillarated in your heart and mind. Expect to be spanked and ravished often, and if you are lucky, impregnated. My requirements are simple. So pay close attention. I do not like repetition and punishments for disobedience are brutal.
I do NOT chat online with potential subs before I have your formal application. You do not get to ask to see the chairman of a company before applying for a job. So, why the disrespect here ? This is like a job ad. If you are serious, apply. I have about 10-15 respectful messages to go through any day. Which ones do you think I am going to spend my weekends on?"
This one goes on as well.. More of the same drivel.. Oh you've got to find and read this one.. He goes on to talk about his 9 1/2 incher.. Great stuff. The really funny part of this but is he says his monster cock isn't going to be the biggest thing going inside of you. I can only imagine what this guy has planned for some poor sub.
But guys seriously.. How many of you get 10-15 messages a day out of the blue from women seeking dominants?
This asshole posts a profile basically talking about how big his dick is, gives no information that would make you see him as anything but a misogynist, doesn't provide any sort of picture of himself, says he won't chat with anyone until he has your "formal application"... You see where this is going, eh?
You know, i'm not blind to the fact there are female subs and slaves out there that WOULD be attracted to a woman hater. It's just sad to me because the sort of people profiles like the above would attract are the sort of people that hate themselves, or have low self esteem. It's to me one of the dark sides of D/s-BDSM.
Over the past week or so i've gotten emails from someone who told me of becoming involved with a couple who were looking for a "beta" slave to join them. She told me that over the space of a few months they exchanged emails and did some chatting on Yahoo, and even talked on the phone some.
She planned a meeting with them and after said meeting was offered and she accepted a collar, after which she began to make the plans to move to be with her new master and sister slave.
This is when it all fell apart. When she moved, (This was explained to me as packing 25-30 large boxes and filling a U-haul truck, along with arranging a transfer where she worked.) she was greeted with the news the alpha slave was no longer in the picture.
Upon reflection, and reviewing some of the Yahoo chats, she discovered both of them used the same typing style and tended to use the same turns of a phrase... etc. I was told she spoke to the woman once on the phone but when she visited the first time the woman was not there but she didn't think anything of that because that was planned.
What I mean is the guy wanted to spend a little time with her alone to evaluate how he and she were together before the three of them interacted together.
It turned out the so called "alpha" was in fact his sister and had been coached as to what to say to her when they'd spoken on the phone. She found this out when the sister called the house one day and she answered and recognized the voice.... oops.
Lucklily for our hero her bridges were not burned behind her so she was able to extract herself from the situation without too much difficulty. She had to stay in that city because of her job but got away from the dishonest man without getting too hurt.
Well, this is really nothing new. How many couple profiles do you see on CM where there are no pictures at all of the couple together? Yes there are many REAL couples but how many more are just like the above? Just as many i'd guess. I'm sure scammers like this have other little tricks to fool someone but you have to believe this would be no different than fake lesbians insofar as when it comes to face to face it's going to fall apart.
This next profile I really like... This is a 25 dominant in the UK.. and well, here it is..
"Here's my offer:
You will live with me
You will get your own space, my basement, which is currently just another bedroom.
You will stay in there unless I wish to use you elsewhere
You will be my slave and will be used for sex, punishment, torture and basically anything I feel like!
When you aren't being used you will be chained in the basement. I will leave the tv down there as long as you're a good girl.
I won't do you any permanent damage and limits will be respected to an extent.
You will get one chance every 2 months to permanently leave this deal. In between those times if you change your mind - TOUGH.
Why do I want this?
Sex on tap 24/7. End of. It's just like having Broadband/Sky.
What do you get out of this?
If you love sex and BDSM, you'll get loads!
However, if you don't then you'll also get £12,000 sterling for 10 months work. That's about minimum wage. You don't have to pay rent/bills/tax. Think about it, it's a decent offer.
Why 10 months?
I want you out of the way by Christmas so my family can come over."
LOL why do I like this profile? I don't know really.. But this cat is honest in a really funny way. Sex on tap 24/7.. Hehehe. And that, "I want you out of the way by Christmas so my family can come over.".. Priceless.
Right fella, while you're keeping this slave/employee chained in the basement all day while you're at work just what do you think is going to happen if god forbid the house catches fire? I have a funny feeling when the fire investigators start poking about and find the charred remains of your little plaything and that chain they're going to start asking some uncomfortable questions... I have an even funnier feeling that they're not going to be buying your answers... And guess where your family will be visiting you at Christmas?
No really. Dude, unattended bondage? Very, VERY bad idea. If you really wanna do this you may need to make it to where the plaything is only chained up when you or someone else is actually home just in case. This is one of those times where I think it's a good idea to recommend some reading. SM 101.. Yeah, it's old but it just might do you some good.. Read it, learn it, live it.
I have my doubts that this cat would actually pay those 12,000 pounds.. But i'm gonna have to keep an eye on this profile just to see if and how this profile evolves.
Eh, not as much lulz as i'd like to go into one of my entries.. But it's been awhile since i've posted something and some of the natives are getting restless.
"Get on it woman!" is what I told just a few minutes ago :-P
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