Oh my goodness gracious, I've had no less than three different dommes message me to speak about the last entry. Apparently all of them of the `fix my roof and we'll call that `service'' type. All of them had some not very nice things to say to me, all of them with hidden profiles, and all of them thought it best to block me from any reply. (I laugh pretty loudly when anything that goes against someone's views is considered `not the true lifestyle'.)

That's really kind of silly when you think about it, as the reason they (Well, i'm not at all sure it wasn't the same person with different names seeing as all of this happened on the same day withing about an hour.) were messaging me to read me the riot act was because of what they read on this blog. Umm, blocking me from replying to your message really only increases the chance what I have to say in reply will end up here... I mean really, if you've read this blog you should know this.

Now, to be specific... I mentioned that sort of domme one example of the sort of dommes submissive men must wade through.. But let me be a little MORE specific about what I mean about that sort. They expect in the name of `service,' to have submssives perform labor for them. Things that would cost quite a bit of coin to have to pay for... in the name of service without any regard whatsoever for the submissive's own desires or fetishes... The reasoning there is if they are trullllllllllly submissive and wish to serve, it shouldn't matter right? (Heh, now I know you fellows know exactly what happens when YOU try to pull that shit on a submissive woman, yes yes?)

Yeah, so tell me this... How does that make that sort of `domme' any different from the financial cunts whose idea of `service' involves gift cards and wish lists.... Making it clear the submissive can (or should) expect nothing in return for the payment?

Yes, yes, that's TRUE service and those who don't understand that don't understand the "lifestyle."



Mmkay folks, now I have a question for all of you. Feel free to post your answers to this question here as a comment, or in a message to me at Collarme. First, let me show you this excerpt from the profile of a 21 lesbian submissive in Kansas.

"- Under the protection of XxxXxxxx. If you insist on being an ass, expect a message from him regarding your behavior -"

Right then, if you were to take the time to look up the person who has that girl under protection, you will find this is a 34 male dominant in Cornwall, United Kingdom. at the bottom of his profile you will find this...

"On a side note? 'XxxxXxxxXxxxx' is under my protection. She is a very special someone and my life is a better place for having her in it. Do not mess with her unless you want to hear from the not so easy-going side of me. Trust me, you don't, so let's just avoid that. Show her some respect. She is lovely, and she deserves it."

Got it... Got it... One is in Kansas and the other is located about 4,000 miles away in the UK. My question is, what in the blue monkey hell can this clown be protecting her from and HOW can he protect her other than sending a strongly worded message and being an Internet tough guy?


There was something else a few months ago that struck me as totally stupid.

It was a submissive woman in Florida and her dominant man in Holland or Denmark. He was messaging people he thought were close to her, trying to hook her up with people so that she could get some experience... Under his supervision of course.

Welllllll... This cat messaged me wondering if I were close enough to this woman and I had a couple of questions for him. One, I wanted to know why HE wasn't giving her this experience he felt she needed.

His answer was that even though they had a very close relationship it just wasn't possible for them to meet in real life. *smirk*

So... How exactly was he planning to `supervise' this, and how does he get the idea that he had any business trying to handle the affairs of someone he already knows he has absoutely no chance to meet in person and is so far away there is no possible way to step in if needed?

I asked those things and wouldn't you know it, he could give no real answer to those questions other than it just `feels right.' I know, doesn't that just take the biscuit?

Okay, I get that many people do this D/s stuff strictly online and that's cool with me. But the above is one of things that just strike me as stupid, not to mention irresponibile of the guy in Holland. I'd also wonder about the woman in Florida who was apparently okay with someone that far away selecting people for her to see in real life...Not to mention how it gives creedence to the idea of being involved with D/s and having your common sense magically disappear.
 
I said it was a few months ago, this particular arrangement no longer exists.

Fuck, I completely got sidetracked and forgot to ask the question. Actually, I forgot the question.. Carry on..



Along the same theme of things in people's profile that make you go, "hmm..."
This is a 55 male dominant in Reno, Nevada who posted as a journal something called the `Female Slave Manifesto.' Now it's written as from the viewpoint of a female slave, but it is clearly written by an internet dom.

Oh, how do I know it was clearly written by an internet Dom? Easily, just put that phrase into Google and the first entry will lead you to the post in the usenet newsgroup alt.sadistic in November of 1998,  and it begins with this..

"These are the words that please the extreme sadist.
I have created them from a composite of several slaves who
served me to the utmost."

So yeah, an online dom wrote it..Read it and tell me how many women you know who are actually like this...

Nevermind that.. here's the part of his profile that makes me go, "huh?"

"I am in great shape, high stamina (fucking 2-3 times DAILY), seek daily use off an on as we deal with the real world in between. My slave would not have to work outside the home but stay in the home naked, collared and used DAILY.  I never want things to become stagnant."

Of course, of course he's got his ideal in mind as does everyone.. But tell me, if you are in fact fucking 2-3 times a day already... (fucking, not tossing off to porn or any such shit like that..).... If you are in fact doing all this fucking on a daily basis, and working full time seeing as how your doormat won't have to work, how do you even have time to be online as often as you are looking for someone who embodies that Female Slave's Manifesto? Oh the Bitch knows you're online a lot. Everytime I logon guess whose name always right at the top? Also, when you find this doormat to keep around naked and collared, will this increase your fucking output or will whomever you're fucking 2 and 3 times a day now be getting a break when the fucking duties are split between them and the doormat?

Look, this is important shit to know!




Here's someone who messaged me to tell me that I was player and then promptly blocked me... I love the homophobic profile of this 67 dominant in Hamilton Ontario, Canada..
"Xxx
      Xxxxx
                Xxx
SIRRR
Is not interested in bi or gay males period.        

NOT into CDs....NOT. Why can't males read english?  I am NOT, NOT, NOT bi.
you can also find Me at XxxXxxxXxxxxxx.

BDSM is not just about sex, that is a very small part of it.. We are open to most and love to entertain....smiles.."

The part about not being into CD's is written in very LARGE type.. He wouldn't want you missing it ya see.

Well tell me, if the sex aspect is `very small' part of BDSM, why does it matter if it's a CD? No really, I keep hearing how BDSM isn't about sex from many people.. If that's the case what does straight, bi, or gay have to do with it?

C'mon gomer, just admit it IS about sex.. as it is for MANY people into BDSM.




Here's one that is actually rather cute in a somewhat fucked up way. We know about the famous BillInBoston (New name is BillInNH) who was and is behind some screennames such as SandraFrasier, LisaMarieRI, SandraGilbert, KarenBlack, Sandra68, Sandra688... amongst others.

He's using a new name lately called Karenonmyown and this one has a male sub and a picture of this sub wearing panties, holding a sign that says, "This cock belongs to Mistress Karen."

I'm sure the irony is unintentional on his part, but the statement is more true than meets the eye. Why? Because the photo is of none other than BillInBoston (BillinNH) himself. Heh, he belongs to himself.. I love it.

Rock on Bill!



Okay, one more and i'll stop for now... This is a 19 female switch in Utah, and the relevant part of her profile is the first line...

"*****Under Possible Consideration*****"


Mmkay, is this a brand new designation within the realm of D/s relationships? Someone is considering whether or not to consider her is what it sounds like to me. What I'm wondering here is whether the vanilla designation of this is `engaged to be engaged?'



No  wait!!!... ONE more.. and I have a funny feeling this one is going to be like peeling an onion or some shit like that. But while browsing I came across this profile from someone called YurixX, a 23 female dominant in Durham, North Carolina.... Here's the profile..

"YurixK is a fake. My and her pics are from a girl I tricked on okcupid. Don't trust anyone with this girls pics. I have more of her that they don't have. Not wanting any thing but for them to be exposed thank you."

And then there's a journal on 8-22-2013...

"YurixK started as a profile to make me admit I am not real and is now a profile trying to use the pics I had to be a profile. Flag him without mercy"

Right then.. I looked for the profile of YurixK and find it's a 23 female dominant in Durham, North Carolina. Same person in the photos, and here's this one's profile..

"After careful consideration, I have decided to take missrachel1 as my new pet. She's rather a huge slut and can't get enough so all of you please feel free to use her with my blessing. Just remember to tell her that her Mistress YuriX sent you."

Still with me? So this YurixK person created a profile to make that YurixX person admit he was a fake, and is now trying to be a normal profile.. So let's peel some more of this onion and see what we can find.. Let's look at this missrachel1 that is mentioned on K's profile...

Missrachel1 is an 18 female dominant in the UK, and there's no written profile.. but there are several journals, here's the latest one on 7-19-2013.

"YurixX is threatening me she says i sent her pic which i didnt if she found pic of me i dont know how she got them and will upload them if i dont take down her pics but i do have one more that she sent that i haven't put up until now."

Right...Right.. This is starting to get weird.. this journal entry is speaking of X.. but K has photos in their profile of the same person in missrachel's profile.. So let's go to the scorecards..

X was messing around with this missrachel1 person... (I'm going to assume they were playing that favorite game of fake lesbians, break or be broken. seeing how X's profile photo shows that person with `slave' written on her arm...)And now K, who according to X was created to make X admit they were a fake... has apparently gone after missrachel1.. Of course if one were to (And I did, by the way) do a photo search on this missrachel1's photos, one would find missrachel1 is in fact a fake.

Mmkay.. back to the scorecard and let's see if we now have the whole picture.

YurixX tricked some girl on OKCupid into sending some photos, which they in turn used to create a profile on CM.. Played around with this missrachel1 person, ended up threatening missrachel1 with photos. Enter YurixK who creates a profile designed to catch YurixX being a fake...Then continues on with photos of missrachel1 in THAT profile and a profile that says they've taken missrachel1 as a pet.

Let's bring this full circle.. I messaged this K person and asked about YurixX's claims... You folks hold on tight.. Y'all are gonna love the reply I got.. Ready?

"From: 
 YurixK

 Dated: 
 8/24/13 2:37 PM 

what he says is true. what he doesn't say is i am the one from okcupid he tricked into sending pics." 

Folks, just let it sink in slowly.. I suspect it's all a load of bullshit, but that was fucking FUNNY!

And on that note.. L8r peepz

You know it doesn't bother me in the least when I get messages from people who don't like my blog or something like that. But it DOES bother me somewhat when I get accused of things that aren't true, in specific that I am looking for money.

On September 1st, I will have maintained this blog for three years, and in all that time not once have I asked for, or accepted any sort of payment. (Yes, I've been offered gift cards and the like quite a few times.) There aren't even any links that act as click cash, or any advertisements.

I do this blog for FUN, and only fun.

Come on people, not everything is a scam. Hehe.



Right then...

How many profiles have you read where the person writing it has become disenchanted with the selection of people on the site and have a new, less nice attitude about the whole thing?

Yeah, quite a lot of them really. I can understand that, seeing all the different sorts of human refuse that can be found on sites such as CM. That whole anonymous thing allows it so it's not shocking that some get disenchanted over time after encountering some of them...

So how about after 1 (count em, ONE) day? Here's a 27 female dominant in Michigan and this person created their profile on 7-10-13 and after one day...this was her entire profile...

"I'm so pissed off at all the as holes on here I just want to make you suffer now."

That's the entire profile. Then there are the two journals written on 7-11-13

"I'm so pissed off at all you wothless mother fuckers on this page. No fucking wonder when I read all the womens profiles on here that they block men. You are fucking relentless and don't stop till you either drive them away or turn off men all together.

I deleted the 7 pages of mail and starting fresh."

And....

"Don't like my attitude, then don't fucking e-mail me. I'm so sick of all this high school bull shit. Grow up, take the bloody tampons out of your ass,  and stop being such little pussies."

Can you just imagine the sort of messages this one got in her first day to cause this profile and journals? Well, any woman can tell you that a new profile will get you at least 100 messages in short order, so it's definitely not so much of a stretch that someone gets 7 pages in a day. 

You submissive guys wonder why you have it so bad on sites like CM? Granted, there are tons of financial cunts to wade through and a lot of dommes whose idea of being served by a submissive rather involve you doing things for them like fix their roof and tend to get pissed off when you have the unmitigated gall to actually want your desires fulfilled in the process. (Even to the point where giving you a `session' is treated as an inconvenience to them.) I've seen some of those types call that looking for a "fetish delivery service"  and if you want such you should go to a professional...

Oh fuck, don't tell me you don't know that type!

Here's a funny blog by someone called HorribleMistress..
http://www.horriblemistress.com/


Yes, there are female versions of the "I don't care what you want" sort of dominants out there and nothing can be done about it any more that you can do anything about their male counterparts... But the above profile is an (extreme) example of the reason you guys looking for a relationship are having trouble. The dominant women looking for relationships are bombarded by messages the moment they create their profile and likely are getting overwhelmed in short order. (Well, all women really.) And you should just see some of the shit we get via messages...

I don't know of any easy solution to that problem, the reality is the vast majority of relationship seekers are never going to find their ONE online... And you guys have a lot of competition for the attention of the real dommes on the site... (Now, by "real" domme you can read it as non-pro, non-fin for this purpose.) I can tell you THIS much however, messaging a woman and telling her in that first message that you want to be her slave is not the way to go about it. Believe me when I tell you that your willingness to jump right into something with no conversation isn't impressive or unique, unless of course you're willing to tribute to them.. hehehe.



Now for some of you dominant men who can't seem to find that special person/people/harem or whatever it is you're seeking... If your profile looks something like this 37 Brooklyn, New York dominant's...

"Straight forward, looking to have Total Control over your life, this means the following:
You do not have a mind, I am the one who keeps your life in order"

... And then goes on to list the activites you like without saying a fucking word about yourself... You know, a little something such as ohhhh... What might qualify you to actually be able to keep another person's life in order....

Do yourself a favor, REWRITE THE FUCKING THING!

The above profile goes on to say that because of the privacy of his past trainees, he can only show you cartoon photos of what you're in store for. (Uh huh.) He also helpfully includes photos of chain, clamps.. etc.

Yeah great, you have some toys. Meaningless photos when there is nothing in those photos that would indicate that you in fact know how to USE those items.

In his journals, he has this complaint about someone he considers to be fake..

"Fake: xxxxxxxxxxxxx Spent an hour texting back and fourth, sent only the Facebook screenshots taken with an iPhone, could not send a current or real photo. And when came done to it, couldn't handle what she was looking for."

Seriously? You spent a WHOLE hour texting? Just fucking wow! I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that it's likely you're going to have to spend a little more time than an hour to find someone such as the creature with no mind you're seeking. I could be mistaken, but somehow I doubt it, seeing as the first word of this cat's name is `Abusive.'



It's always kind of fun to read a profile and then try to figure out what part of said profile is a lie. Let me show you what I mean...

This is a 50 male dominant in Tulsa, Oklahoma and here's the entire profile..

"Lifestyle experienced for over 40 years. I enjoy your tears and will push you to the edge, testing each of your limits. Just how much can you handle? cuffs? clamps? But for how long? Try me and see! You must be serious about this and willing to prove it."

So, what do you think he's lying about, being 50, or having over 40 years of experience? Or perhaps you think he's telling the truth about both and in fact started in the "lifestyle" before he was 10?



This next bit is only for those in Ohio, so you folks in Ohio need to pay special attention, it's rather important you see.

This is a 50 female dominant near Columbus, Ohio... I and swear to all that is kinky and good this is an advertisement for something called "The Church of Authority and Atonement."

No, i'm serious, that's what it is.. Here's a little excerpt of the profile..

"This is an actual church that is devoted to assisting penitents to come to grips with the emotions, attitudes, and viewpoints that stand in the way of their learning to accept authority into their lives through the meaningful atonement of corporal penance."

This person refers to herself as the Reverend Mother and thankfully, there is no cost to us penitents to join the church..

"There is no cost to join the Church. Once enrolled as a penitent, a chuch member may place themselves on the Penance Roster by sending an email requesting Disciplinary Counseling at The Rectory. This counseling is designed to allow the penitent to review his inner spiritual fears regarding authority and external control. After counseling a penitent will be awarded penance with the Paddle of Atonement by the Reverend Mother. There will be no other implements of any kind used. No wooden spoons, no belts, no canes, no whips. Correction and discipline is administered ONLY with the Paddle of Atonement."

Ah, the Paddle of Atonement. You would think just on the surface that this paddle would be some elaborately fashioned tool of correction, perhaps ezblozened with some deep and meaningful proverb or some such, right? Nope... It's a cheap looking hunk of wood with some red twine wrapped around it, photographed as it stands against a stark white wall with sort of dingy baseboarding.

Somehow, I suspect this person is going to be rather on the popular side.... I don't know why. No really, free ass beatings and all you have to do is put up with the moralizing of Rev. Mama and then you get your ass whipping?.. Oh fuck yes, this one is gonna be popular.


For those of you who would be more inclined toward the other side of the spectrum... We have his infernal majesty himself.. Satan, a 53 dominant in Texas.

Not some reverend or any shit like that, this is the man himself. The guy seems real enough, but I had to include it after talking about the Church of Authority and Atonement, eh?


I'm going to end this entry by speaking of a real act of class. I'm sure many of you have heard the story of 12 year old Grant Reed, an Ohio State fan who named the cancer he was diagnosed with, "Michigan" so that when he beat it he can say he beat Michigan. Happy ending here is the cancer is in full remission. 

The act of class... Brady Hoke, the head coach of Michigan called the kid and invited he and his father to attend "The Game" (Annual Ohio State vs Michigan football game, in Ann Arbor this year.) as his guest. Further, the Rotary Club of Jackson, Mi. has offered to pay for the Reeds' hotel.

Said Troy Reed, Grant's father, a former member of the Buckeye's marching band...."It's getting hard to keep my dislike for them, because they've been so classy and unbelievable to us, but it won't be hard to cheer for the Buckeyes."

The best part will be when Grant and his family take the field at Ann Arbor in November and, for just a few minutes, fans of both teams will cheer at the top of their lungs at the same time.

Two thumbs up to Brady Hoke and the Rotary Club of Jackson, Michigan. 

That's it for now..

L8r peepz..

When I start getting messages every day wondering when I'm going to update this blog, I know it's getting time to either try to get it updated or exit stage left. I'm not ready to delete the UltimateDomme profile just yet, so let's see what we can find, hmm?

So, i've been seeing a lot of people in their profiles making fun of those who discovered BDSM via the evil 50 Shades of Grey...(Gasp!) For some reason, the cool kids feel the need to look down their noses at those who have done so.. But WHY?

How different is it from those who discovered this thing of ours via such routes as Story of O, Exit to Eden, Man With a Maid,  9 1/2 weeks, The Beauty Series, the Gor novels, The Secretary? What percentage of those who are into this kink discovered it via one of those avenues? I'll bet it's a significantly high percentage and there isn't a title in the above that represents anything resembling reality.

Oh I know, I know, I know, they don't have a clue about the TRUEEEEEEEEEEEE lifestyle. Whatever the fucking true lifestyle is I have no idea, but what those people who got turned on and interested in exploring because of 50 Shades DO have is some idea of what turns them on. If by some chance they can find someone who fits in with their desires, why do any one of you give a fuck? Climb down off your high horses already, you intolerant elitists.


Right then... Here's one i'm sure we've all seen variations of.. This one just tickled my funny bone.   It's a 29 female dominant from Boston, Mass and she had the following journal entry..

"Until further notice I will not return any messages that are not accompanied with a small (ie $15 or above) item purchased from My wish list.  If you can't open your wallet in such a pathetic manner to prove you are serious and I should keep communicating then move on.

This doesn't make Me a finDomme, just sick of time wasters and this shows Me you are at least partially for real"

Hmm, So she expects to be paid something to even TALK to you... but that doesn't make her a findomme ya see, but rather just someone sick of time wasters..

Uh huh, ask any financial cunt what their definition of a "time waster" is and the answer will be someone who wants to get something for nothing, and will not TRIBUTE.

Ah, now you know how I am with favoriting profiles so that I can easily find them again when I want to have a go at them. I did that with this one, and got this message...

 MistressEmmyOwns  on 6/9/13 at 10:53 PM:

 you are funny i just read this for the first time

 UltimateDomme on 6/10/13 at 4:34 PM:

 Really? Most financial cunts don't especially like my humor.

 MistressEmmyOwns  on 6/10/13 at 4:39 PM:

 I meant more pathetic.  And I am not a financial cunt.  you stupid pig.

Oh dear, it seems I upest this moron. Of course you know I was blocked after this. Eh and while writing this entry, it seems the person's profile no longer exists. Well shit.



Last time I posted (Yeah, I know it was several months ago) I made mention of a guy who put, "If I admired your profile there's probably something in it that I like" in his profile and had myself a bit of a giggle.

I've gotten several messages from those who know who that person is, he goes by the name of CellarPainDoor. Now, how might those people know who I was referring to in my last entry? Easy, he favorites EVERY woman he sees. All in all, the cat is harmless, he's looking for people to play for him on Skype and even puts that in his profile. He doesn't contact you in any way except to favorite your profile. Oh yes of course, favoriting someone's profile without sending them a message is a crime that's right up there with genocide from seeing how some people carry on about it.

He's got a new persona too, a 23 year old dominant in Boston, Mass.. same bit in his profile, same sort of photos from beefcake sites.. xsufferx is his new name, i'll bet you've been favorited by one or both of these folks.. Heheh

The somewhat more sinister folks are those such as Sadist26 and a few other names. They message you with fake claims and tell you that you've been reported. If you argue enough, it will eventually come down to them seeing you on camera to prove yourself to them. Funny stuff, that.



Over the past couple of years I've had a couple of people message me to comment on my blog and then invite me to have a go at their profile. Except for way back in the beginning I haven't done so.

Recently I had someone do this and when he invited me to have a `swipe' at his profile, I viewed it and in turn told the guy he also had a funny profile. (Well, he DOES! As an aside, he didn't message me again, hmm.) I wasn't going to post about it because I figured it HAD to be a joke profile. It and his journal are written in all caps, and is a bit of a ramble..

It HAS to be a joke profile, errr right? Well, i'll let you judge for yourself.. This is a 58 dominant from Bunkersburg, Canada. Here's the journal he posted.

"I AM GETTING COMPLAINTS FROM FEMALES WHO SAY, ''YOU ARE SO ARROGANT''.   LISTEN UP-LOOK...I AM ALPHA-A...NOT BETA-A...NOT ALPHA-B....BUT, GET THIS> ''ALPHA-A''.   THAT'S THE TOP OF THE ''FOOD CHAIN. I BACK THIS CLAIM UP WITH MY: BRAIN, MIND,   MOUTH, FIST, KNIFE, AND GUN. I AM MORE THEN WILLING TO GO TO THE ''MAT'' OR ''WALL''   FOR WHAT I SAY-ETC.. I DO NOT CARE WHAT ''CUNTS'' THINK ABOUT ANYTHING,   INCLUDING YOUR FIXATION ON SHOES AS AN INDICATOR OF YOUR ''WHATEVER''.   GROW THE FUCK UP."

You'd have to read the profile to see it, but this cat is really freaked out about shoes. I don't even want to know why. *giggle*

"Shoesssss!" - Lilianna, Dragon Age : Origins




Here's one whose name on CM I think needs to be rethought. Let me explain, this is a 41 dominant in ON, Canada and this fella considers himself to be um, well hung. We can ascertain this from his name. The profile itself is nothing much other than he speaks of himself in the third person which always causes me to roll my eyes, but the photos in this one caused me to cover my mouth to keep from spewing the liquid I was drinking all over my monitor.

Anyway, all three photos in his profile are of what I assume to be this guy's erect cock. Now, far be it from me to call someone a liar or deluded.... But dude,  if you're going to make such a boast about yourself, it's probably not a very good idea to hold your hand in such a way in your photos that quite clearly reveal your thumb is nearly as large as your manhood.. Just sayin'!



Ah, not too much to say this time.. Just consider this an "I'm still around" sort of post. Hopefully there will be more soon, but no promises..


L8r Peepz