So here we are, it's been a couple of months since we've last gathered here... Didya miss me, huh huh?
Ah, just to giggle a little at that silly collarmefakes.com website, they've accomplished exactly what I said they would. Some of the old fakes have disappeared and a whole new crop of fakes with new profiles, (And pictures for all you collectors) have emerged to carry on the tradition.
One of the moderators there (The very same started looking for a master at age 12 I spoke of before) has posted a ton of shit calling out fake doms.. Basically she posts the conversation, and I have to admit most of the people who she is posting about sound like a bunch of morons based on what she's posting.. There have been times when her Master has seen fit to take over the keyboard and give the moron in question a piece of his mind... One little interesting tidbit about that... He types in the exact same typing style as his slave...
Just Sayin'!
Interestingly enough, i've begun to notice something that I am sure was already there... But it has eluded me until now. There is an interestingly high amount of so called lesbians who have that ONE, only ONE man in their lives and he just happens to be the most wonderful person in the whole fucking world. I mean no one can compare.
Knock me over with a damned feather on how I missed this, but find out who this wonderful guy is and you've just uncovered the moron behind the fake's profile.
"Well duh!" I'm sure many of you are saying. Yeah, color me stoopid on this one, I didn't get it until very recently. (Translation, i've been really digging for the lulz and have been giving some of these profiles some real close looks.)
Some old favorites have returned as well, my old friend Mzcourtney has returned to us with a brand new name, Mzcourtneyagain <--- I swear that's what he's calling himself now!.. Ah, he's got the same pictures and the profile has taken out the most entertaining bits, (Plugging yourself before messaging him and that whole, "I make my parents kneel for me" bit that sent me into hyterical fits of laughter.).. But it's the same guy with pretty much the same sort of profile. Funnier is there's someone called lilly2serve who claims to be a 23 year old using the exact 4 pictures, with a journal entry speaking of how mzcourtneyagain has "stolen" her fake photos.
These two ought to get together and sort this out, there are about 200 photos of the model in the photos on Flickr, just look for CATE. I mean come on now, they should be able to figure this out easily enough.
Another old favorite with a new twist.. Well, not an old favorite since I only mentioned this dude in the last post. But i'm talking about the guy called HarvardDomDC... If one were to do a search of the name HarvardDom on CM, you'll find that this dude has a total of 9 profiles, putting him in different areas..
LA, NJ, NYC, Boston, DC, Texas, Philly, India and last but not least, CT. All nine of them have the same bullshit story, but it's kind of comforting in a seriously fucked up way to know just how many places are getting their own HarvardDom.. Sort of like a chain of restaurants or something.
Oh yeah, there's also a 10th HarvardDom.. but instead of a 25 or 26 year old with the bullshit story, it's of a 42 dominant in Cambridge, Mass. I have a feeling this one is quite likely the real deal. LOL.
Right then, here's a 61 female slave in Michigan, and while I think this is funny, it's also a bit sad..
Eh, instead of trying to explain it, i'll just let her do the explaining on this one.. It's two journal entries.. The first one sets the scene..
"My Master has instructed me to explain in general what I did to get my ass in such big trouble and then ask you what should my punishment be for my transgression. So here it goes,let me begin with a little explanation of my emotional state in the past weeks and more so now that I have been away from home for a week. I am and always will be an insecure person which my Master knows well. I have had little physical contact with my Master since the beginning of October. I have been lonely and miserable without him. I am away from home and missed him terribly. I had too many drinks Friday Night not excuses explanations of where I was emotionally. Master and I have had a bumpy road to this point indiscretions and errors of both of our parts left my trust in anyone shaky, even though I tried. I worry constantly about my Master wanting someone else younger, prettier, wilder etc. Yes insecure very much so!! Well Friday I had a fight with another person in my life that upset me greatly, I was lonely, I wasn't home I drank."
Yeah, I want you to pay special attention to the bit that says, "Master and I have had a bumpy road to this point indiscretions and errors of both of our parts left my trust in anyone shaky, even though I tried."
In the end, that sentence tells the entire story.
Right... so let's look at the journal entry that details the terrible crime she committed.
"Please read this and tell me what you think my punishment should be...Well now that there is a little back ground here is what I did...I created a fake profile. After I told my Master I was going to bed and we said GN I signed onto the fake ID. Truly I wanted to see if he would contact me within seconds I had a message from him, we chatted fake me asked if he had a sub/slave, he responded no not at this time, I was shocked and hurt, all I really wanted was for him tell me or anyone about me. That he had a slave and a damn good one! That was not the case...I didn't chat much longer I was crying and hurt. I in anger copied and pasted the message into a message to him...telling him enjoy the rest of his life. He told me he knew it was me and wasn't playing my "game" After an angry exchange we left chat... I spent the night miserable crying thinking he didn't care at all about me. Now I know I approached this all very wrong...I was disobedient, disrespectful and dishonest. Now what should my punishment be???"
So, she logs off and uses a fake profile and she catches the dude trying to better deal her.. Busts him on it.. He comes right back saying he knew it was her all along... And she BOUGHT IT!! Turned that shit right around on her and made it her fault.
Hey, well maybe he DID know it was her all along. I see profiles that are supposed to be different people but the typing style is the exact same. (I'm looking in your direction MistressGaby, MaidAlice, Sexysecretary, Slutsophie1, BossAlice... et al)
Or maybe he's the type we know SO well... who knows..
Anyway, she's asking for suggestions as to what her punishment should be. I can just imagine some of the messages she's getting with the details of said punishments.. But I errr.. I umm have my own idea..
Would you like to hear it?
Very well..
Her punishment should be.... That she be required to find someone new and put this guy in the rearview mirror. Oh, not because I think the guy is in the wrong, it's because any relationship where there is no trust is not a relationship at all. Better in my opinion to hurt now and then move forward with lessons hopefully learned.
As I said, that bit I quoted twice tells the entire story.. Point of interest, those two journal entries have vanished and have been replaced by an entry with the topic of deception.
Here's another on that same theme.
This is a 27 female submissive in Illinois and here's the first paragraph in her profile..
"I am an owned slut that is being punished. MY master has instructed me to post on this site...looking for men/women that want to use me, abuse me."
She posted this journal entry in Jan. of 2011
"Hoping that strict/mean dominant men/women find the time to use me....abuse me...humiliate me....so that master forgives me.....
IF you do it well enough....you may get me in real-life"
Uh huh..
And another in May of 2011.
"Master is upset with me......he feels i am not being used enough online. I feel i am disrespecting him by not finding men to interview me, humilate me...............where are those men?????"
As of this writing on the 21st, I see this person was last on 11-18-11.. And the punishment is apparently still going on... yes?
10 months and counting... You've GOT to wonder what she did to merit a 10 month and counting punishment.. Probably some silly shit such as forgetting to kneel a certain way...
Heh, here's one from the "while the cat's away" files.. a 38 female slave in Texas..
"she is already collared, to a soldier in Afghanistan - she is not looking for a full-time relationship - she would love to serve someone but not sexually - she just needs to feel useful again. her Master is deployed for at least 7 more months... she is afraid of forgetting how to be His true slave if she has no practice. she would prefer a Master who already owns a slave, but has inner desires to be worshiped which are not being fulfilled."
So, she only wants the practice huh? LOL. No really, she just wants to practice.. honest injun!!
You've got to love it when someone appears to forget what is in their profile and posts a journal entry contradicting it.
Here's a 19 female slave in Florida. First she says she is owned and it's one of those profiles where "Master may monitor this profile" sort of things. Here's a paragragh in her profile.
"This is my first time at real ownership. I have met my master originally 2 years ago. A local dom who I spent one night with then we lost touch over the years."
Keep in mind this profile was created 11-18-11. A week ago. Anyway, since when is two years ago "over the years"..? They make it sound like it was ancient history. Well, with the average life of your typical online relationship being what, 3 weeks? I suppose two whole years can be seen as "over the years." Eh..
Right then, so the "master" who may be monitoring said profile has posted a journal on the 21st and here's how it starts.
"I originally met this slut a few years ago here on collarme. We did a few basic training techniques and played around a bit.
Throughout the years we had lost touch then spoke then lost touch again. Recently, she contacted me again asking what kind of life she would have as my slave and I informed her that she would be completely controlled."
So, instead of being a local dom she spent one night with two years ago, it was someone met a few years ago for a few basic training techniques and playing around a bit. Gotta wonder, if this person is 19 now and was met on CM a "few years ago".. Just HOW many years ago and how old was this one back then?
Anyway, a contradicting story after only three days of the profile being created? For fuck's sake!
And finally, we have a 22 female slave in the UK and here's her profile.. She's created a new awards competition..
"Following a number of credible entries for a competition that never existed, I'm pleased to announce the first ever Unofficial CollarMe Biggest Fucktard Competition!!! Nominations to follow... First Nominations;
From: michealp Dated:09/20/2011 12:35 AM I am 43 look 35 handsome and a millionaire I want u here
From: mark191 Dated:10/30/11 8:40 AM hi i want to fuck you in your ass doggy style while pulling your hair then tie you to the bed and make you orgasm over and over again until you beg me to stop, then make you wear a really short skirt with no under wear and make you go shopping and stick a dildo up your ass and turn it on halfway round, then fist you in your ass and pussy at the same time then go for a walk in the park and il make you give me a blowjob and cum over your face then piss on you and make you walk round like it, then i will fuck you in your ass and cum up it then fist out the cum" <---- Ewwwww.. Just EWWWWW!
It's black friday so you know what that means.. All that working out we did all year to stay in shape for the dog eat dog world of door busters and out of this world bargains pays off today.
Remember... when the going gets tough... the tough so shopping!
Friday, November 25, 2011
Thursday, September 1, 2011
Hey kids!... Shake it loose together... The spotlight's hitting something that's been known to change the weather.. We'll kill the fatted calf tonight so.. Stick around..
Oh you know that song.. Bennie and the Jets..ssssss
Lotta shit going on for the bitch at this particular moment, so you'll understand when I say adding to this blog isn't top of the priority list. But I wanted to get a new entry out today, because it's been a whole fucking year today when I started this blog.. I don't know how funny it will be, because well.. I gotta say this again, we've all seen those profiles time and time again, you know after all this time it's more like i'm doing nothing but picking at the scabs..
I went back and read all the shit from the beginning.. It took over an hour to read the whole thing. Heh, every now and again I get a message from some asshole who can't take issue over anything I wrote about.. no no.. He wants to take issue with the fact I have time to come up with the shit and write it.
Yeah, like having time to create the shit causes what I say to be less valid.. Yeah okay..
Well at first, until i'd say about the first of this year, it didn't take a whole lot of effort to come up with this shit. An hour or so to write it up and get it posted.. shit like that. It still doesn't take a lot of time to write it, it's been taking a lot of time to actually find the shit, hard to come up with new stuff to write about when it's been strip mined... lol..
Okay then, after a whole fucking year one thing shines through all my attempts at comedy.. And even the occasional foray i've (tried) to take into the realm of common sense.. And that one thing shining though all of it is.. There's some seriously fucked up people out there flying the D/s and BDSM flag!!
Eh.. So off to the profiles..
Right, have you ever been browsing profiles and just by the name you knew it was going to be an entertaining profile? Here's one that just takes your breath away... Heh..
This is a 26 dominant in Washington DC and here we go.. Start the music...
"I am a graduate from Harvard -- and that is a relatively minor thing in my view. I am looking for a female sub/slave to share my life with."
It's SUCH a minor thing in his view that not only does he point it out on the very first line of his profile, the name of that school is a part of his profile name... Oh no, he doesn't want to rub anyone's nose in it or anything of that sort, now does he?
A minor thing, my ass.
"I am generally against poly households as in my past experience these are emotionally very vexing for the female slaves. However, I have had good poly experiences as well, as it sometimes helps the subs support each other. You should not expect to be part of a poly unless I make that determination after seeing you and gauging your capacity to be part of one."
Yeah, umm in the actively searching for section of his profile what is ticked but "joining a poly household" and "submissive women" Err, but he's generally against them? Must be that Harvard education causing this little contradiction to go right over my head. Too cerebal for us mere mortals I suspect.
"I can be quite intense and quite light, depending on my mood. By and large, BDSM is full of "usual" play stuff like bondage, suspension, claming, wax etc. but I have worked quite hard over my 10 years of experience in the lifestyle to invent new sex acts, sex positions, and roleplays.
You will find these exotically interesting, and it always help to keep the interest level alive. Some examples are Bamboo-Strip, Teleporting Vegas, Harem Poetry, Gulf of Mexico, P/E ratio, and Furniture Metamorphosis.
Some key sexual positions that I've invented are the African Missionary, the Gymnast's Blowjob, and Gold Rush."
Hmmmm, i'm sitting here wondering if he should get this cat in touch with that guy in Canada who breaks "the cumming record" of women all over the world?
Anyway, I read this profile and the first question that came to mind was... Does this guy walk on water as well?
I mean really, is there anyone more perfect than this cat? *giggle*
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EprQGmZ3Imw
And he knows i'm right!
Okay then, it's generally accepted that someone who is in their early twenties simply cannot have a lot of experience. I've already stated my belief that it IS possible for someone that young to have certain knowledge, but not the actual experience.. It's just not possible.
So, here's someone who tries to shoot that one all to hell and back.. This is a 24 and 23 Dom/Slave couple in Florida and here's one of the journal entries.
"I've got to say...men over the age of thirty five or fourty have got it made in our lifestyle. Seems to be "mature" and "educated", you need to be these ages.
I've got news for all you submissive and slaves out there that I suggest you heed and understand:
I am only twenty three myself....and I've experienced more tragedy, more trouble, more problems.....dominated more situations, commanded more respect and attention, and earned more power amoungt my peers than anyone I have ever met that is twice my age. With that said, don't mistake maturity for age. Age is not a handicapp....its what makes you thirsty.
So, with that said, I am still looking for my next slave. Good luck..."
Translation: He's been getting shot down by women who are looking for someone with like real experience and this was his attempt to debunk that errr myth.
I mean come on, just because someone hasn't been on this earth long enough to actually have that kind of experience doesn't mean it's true that he doesn't!!
Here's a 50 male dominant from Georgia and he asks an interesting question in his journals..
"I just don't understand sometimes. If I am a Dom, who has a sub that will not do what you ask of her, what does this mean? Could it be that she is not the sub or slave she says that she is? If someone is a "sub" are they not suppose to do what you ask of them?, to follow their Dom's wishes? I give her everything I can, and ask very little in return, sometimes I wonder who is the sub, her or me?"
Well, from reading this guy's profile he's most likely to want an online relationship, but for the sake of education, let us answer this guy's questions, eh?
Actually he's asked the wrong question here. The question should be whether or not you're the Dom you say you are, not the other way around.
Hehe, this is the sort of dom all those "go totally out of their way to show they're not doormats" sort of subs would be attracted to. Oh come on now, you know the sort I speak of. The sort of submissive who make you feel as if you're walking on eggshells whenever you communicate with them for fear of saying the wrong thing and setting them off. They'll slice you to ribbons at the drop of a hat.... And then there's the inevitible journal entry that complains they are not having any luck on their search, or their "gift" was pissed on.
Check this guy out, ballbuster subs.. Here's one you can walk all over.
Okay, here's a 34 female dominant in Texas and well.. You tell me, did someone get gamed with this one?
"Recently released a boy (all the below journals) from my consideration. It was a great d/s thing for more than a year. It made me realize so many wonderful things about myself and what I want going forward with this lifestyle. It also helped me discover that I'm not sedentary to Houston. I have been here nearly 5 years and feel it is probably time to move on and move away to a new adventure."
She had someone on "consideration" for over a year and never made the decision on whether to collar him or not? Well, I really have to say, "caveat emptor" on this one.. I mean really, he must have let her get away with it for that long.. Eh, whatcha wanna bet that her decision to "release him from her consideration" came as a result of this guy saying, "Now hold on here..."?
Here's a pretty funny one for those of you who appreciate the humorous sort of profiles..
This is a 30 dominant in Illinois...
"I'm into pretty extreme things. Lobotomy, euthanasia, rusty trombones and making you watch Lady Gaga strapped to a chair with your eyelids taped open à la clockwork orange, to name a few.
When I'm not taking pictures of myself with my iphone in the mirror, or posting constant updates of frivolous shit I'm doing at any given time, I enjoy reading the new testament while sitting on the crapper.
Feel free to contact me to discuss any topic you can think of, unless you like Glenn Beck, because you're clearly an asshole.
Also this is a sandy vagina free zone, don't you forget that."
We are separated by a common language.... Here's a 22 female submissive in the UK and I love this journal entry..
"In Britain I have a bottom, bum or more crudely an arse soo why are British people telling me they want to beat my ass? Stop it."
I love to watch British spanking videos. Not because they are so much better action wise, it's because the tops in those videos are always so righteous about what they're doing.. Seriously, you'd think the bottom had committed a death penalty crime or something the way they carry on about it.
Actually spanking videos in general make me laugh, especially when the scenario is some some of discipline. Come on, when you were a kid and got it from your parents, did they take time out for a fucking "warm up" before beating your bare ass with whatever was handy? Oh hell no.
Eh, not in the videos.. "Oh, drinking and driving were you? So, first over my knee with you so I can first whack you over this too small skirt, then lift it after a bit so I have have at you over your panties.."
Granted, these are actors who may or may not like spanking... Oh okay, these are BAD actors who may or may not like spanking.. whatever.
Now video companies such as Lupus/Rigid East.. Oh, when they get going they whip some asses raw. Heh, I was chatting with someone who mentioned one of those videos and was wondering how the girl was able to take such a caning. (If you've never seen a Rigid East/Lupus video, those butts are bruised and battered by the time the scene is done.)
Silly me took the question literally and said, "Um, because she got paid to take it?"
Heh, I was out of town the other day and was sitting on my android browsing on CM when I ran across a profile and I thought to myself, "wow!"
I don't remember the name of this person but in her profile she talks about getting married not too long ago but wasn't getting what she wanted from her husband so was here on CM on the prowl. In the profile pictures were two of this person in her wedding gown. Taken on her wedding day mayhap? I dunno, but I saw that and i'm going.. "Oh, that's fucking COLD!"
Damn, a whole year. Well, happy fucking anniversary!!
Oh you know that song.. Bennie and the Jets..ssssss
Lotta shit going on for the bitch at this particular moment, so you'll understand when I say adding to this blog isn't top of the priority list. But I wanted to get a new entry out today, because it's been a whole fucking year today when I started this blog.. I don't know how funny it will be, because well.. I gotta say this again, we've all seen those profiles time and time again, you know after all this time it's more like i'm doing nothing but picking at the scabs..
I went back and read all the shit from the beginning.. It took over an hour to read the whole thing. Heh, every now and again I get a message from some asshole who can't take issue over anything I wrote about.. no no.. He wants to take issue with the fact I have time to come up with the shit and write it.
Yeah, like having time to create the shit causes what I say to be less valid.. Yeah okay..
Well at first, until i'd say about the first of this year, it didn't take a whole lot of effort to come up with this shit. An hour or so to write it up and get it posted.. shit like that. It still doesn't take a lot of time to write it, it's been taking a lot of time to actually find the shit, hard to come up with new stuff to write about when it's been strip mined... lol..
Okay then, after a whole fucking year one thing shines through all my attempts at comedy.. And even the occasional foray i've (tried) to take into the realm of common sense.. And that one thing shining though all of it is.. There's some seriously fucked up people out there flying the D/s and BDSM flag!!
Eh.. So off to the profiles..
Right, have you ever been browsing profiles and just by the name you knew it was going to be an entertaining profile? Here's one that just takes your breath away... Heh..
This is a 26 dominant in Washington DC and here we go.. Start the music...
"I am a graduate from Harvard -- and that is a relatively minor thing in my view. I am looking for a female sub/slave to share my life with."
It's SUCH a minor thing in his view that not only does he point it out on the very first line of his profile, the name of that school is a part of his profile name... Oh no, he doesn't want to rub anyone's nose in it or anything of that sort, now does he?
A minor thing, my ass.
"I am generally against poly households as in my past experience these are emotionally very vexing for the female slaves. However, I have had good poly experiences as well, as it sometimes helps the subs support each other. You should not expect to be part of a poly unless I make that determination after seeing you and gauging your capacity to be part of one."
Yeah, umm in the actively searching for section of his profile what is ticked but "joining a poly household" and "submissive women" Err, but he's generally against them? Must be that Harvard education causing this little contradiction to go right over my head. Too cerebal for us mere mortals I suspect.
"I can be quite intense and quite light, depending on my mood. By and large, BDSM is full of "usual" play stuff like bondage, suspension, claming, wax etc. but I have worked quite hard over my 10 years of experience in the lifestyle to invent new sex acts, sex positions, and roleplays.
You will find these exotically interesting, and it always help to keep the interest level alive. Some examples are Bamboo-Strip, Teleporting Vegas, Harem Poetry, Gulf of Mexico, P/E ratio, and Furniture Metamorphosis.
Some key sexual positions that I've invented are the African Missionary, the Gymnast's Blowjob, and Gold Rush."
Hmmmm, i'm sitting here wondering if he should get this cat in touch with that guy in Canada who breaks "the cumming record" of women all over the world?
Anyway, I read this profile and the first question that came to mind was... Does this guy walk on water as well?
I mean really, is there anyone more perfect than this cat? *giggle*
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EprQGmZ3Imw
And he knows i'm right!
Okay then, it's generally accepted that someone who is in their early twenties simply cannot have a lot of experience. I've already stated my belief that it IS possible for someone that young to have certain knowledge, but not the actual experience.. It's just not possible.
So, here's someone who tries to shoot that one all to hell and back.. This is a 24 and 23 Dom/Slave couple in Florida and here's one of the journal entries.
"I've got to say...men over the age of thirty five or fourty have got it made in our lifestyle. Seems to be "mature" and "educated", you need to be these ages.
I've got news for all you submissive and slaves out there that I suggest you heed and understand:
I am only twenty three myself....and I've experienced more tragedy, more trouble, more problems.....dominated more situations, commanded more respect and attention, and earned more power amoungt my peers than anyone I have ever met that is twice my age. With that said, don't mistake maturity for age. Age is not a handicapp....its what makes you thirsty.
So, with that said, I am still looking for my next slave. Good luck..."
Translation: He's been getting shot down by women who are looking for someone with like real experience and this was his attempt to debunk that errr myth.
I mean come on, just because someone hasn't been on this earth long enough to actually have that kind of experience doesn't mean it's true that he doesn't!!
Here's a 50 male dominant from Georgia and he asks an interesting question in his journals..
"I just don't understand sometimes. If I am a Dom, who has a sub that will not do what you ask of her, what does this mean? Could it be that she is not the sub or slave she says that she is? If someone is a "sub" are they not suppose to do what you ask of them?, to follow their Dom's wishes? I give her everything I can, and ask very little in return, sometimes I wonder who is the sub, her or me?"
Well, from reading this guy's profile he's most likely to want an online relationship, but for the sake of education, let us answer this guy's questions, eh?
Actually he's asked the wrong question here. The question should be whether or not you're the Dom you say you are, not the other way around.
Hehe, this is the sort of dom all those "go totally out of their way to show they're not doormats" sort of subs would be attracted to. Oh come on now, you know the sort I speak of. The sort of submissive who make you feel as if you're walking on eggshells whenever you communicate with them for fear of saying the wrong thing and setting them off. They'll slice you to ribbons at the drop of a hat.... And then there's the inevitible journal entry that complains they are not having any luck on their search, or their "gift" was pissed on.
Check this guy out, ballbuster subs.. Here's one you can walk all over.
Okay, here's a 34 female dominant in Texas and well.. You tell me, did someone get gamed with this one?
"Recently released a boy (all the below journals) from my consideration. It was a great d/s thing for more than a year. It made me realize so many wonderful things about myself and what I want going forward with this lifestyle. It also helped me discover that I'm not sedentary to Houston. I have been here nearly 5 years and feel it is probably time to move on and move away to a new adventure."
She had someone on "consideration" for over a year and never made the decision on whether to collar him or not? Well, I really have to say, "caveat emptor" on this one.. I mean really, he must have let her get away with it for that long.. Eh, whatcha wanna bet that her decision to "release him from her consideration" came as a result of this guy saying, "Now hold on here..."?
Here's a pretty funny one for those of you who appreciate the humorous sort of profiles..
This is a 30 dominant in Illinois...
"I'm into pretty extreme things. Lobotomy, euthanasia, rusty trombones and making you watch Lady Gaga strapped to a chair with your eyelids taped open à la clockwork orange, to name a few.
When I'm not taking pictures of myself with my iphone in the mirror, or posting constant updates of frivolous shit I'm doing at any given time, I enjoy reading the new testament while sitting on the crapper.
Feel free to contact me to discuss any topic you can think of, unless you like Glenn Beck, because you're clearly an asshole.
Also this is a sandy vagina free zone, don't you forget that."
We are separated by a common language.... Here's a 22 female submissive in the UK and I love this journal entry..
"In Britain I have a bottom, bum or more crudely an arse soo why are British people telling me they want to beat my ass? Stop it."
I love to watch British spanking videos. Not because they are so much better action wise, it's because the tops in those videos are always so righteous about what they're doing.. Seriously, you'd think the bottom had committed a death penalty crime or something the way they carry on about it.
Actually spanking videos in general make me laugh, especially when the scenario is some some of discipline. Come on, when you were a kid and got it from your parents, did they take time out for a fucking "warm up" before beating your bare ass with whatever was handy? Oh hell no.
Eh, not in the videos.. "Oh, drinking and driving were you? So, first over my knee with you so I can first whack you over this too small skirt, then lift it after a bit so I have have at you over your panties.."
Granted, these are actors who may or may not like spanking... Oh okay, these are BAD actors who may or may not like spanking.. whatever.
Now video companies such as Lupus/Rigid East.. Oh, when they get going they whip some asses raw. Heh, I was chatting with someone who mentioned one of those videos and was wondering how the girl was able to take such a caning. (If you've never seen a Rigid East/Lupus video, those butts are bruised and battered by the time the scene is done.)
Silly me took the question literally and said, "Um, because she got paid to take it?"
Heh, I was out of town the other day and was sitting on my android browsing on CM when I ran across a profile and I thought to myself, "wow!"
I don't remember the name of this person but in her profile she talks about getting married not too long ago but wasn't getting what she wanted from her husband so was here on CM on the prowl. In the profile pictures were two of this person in her wedding gown. Taken on her wedding day mayhap? I dunno, but I saw that and i'm going.. "Oh, that's fucking COLD!"
Damn, a whole year. Well, happy fucking anniversary!!
Saturday, July 23, 2011
For those of you who thought the exploits of Lorena Bobbitt were but an ancient (and painful) memory, think again.
http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/article/ALeqM5grVfnCH8wlrsAO5-GOb6ueKIRCRg?docId=90a2b924d63943efa3d2aeab153c2b08
Now I know, it's cruel to laugh at something like that.. But dammit, i'm going to do it anyway!
This woman is much more vicious than Lorenna Bobbitt ever was. I'm serious, Lorenna whacked off John Wayne Bobbitt's little soldier while he was asleep and then tossed it out of the car. (Although it's kind of hard to imagine being able to sleep through that.)
THIS women, Catherine Kieu... drugged his ass, and when he woke up found himself tied up. She waited until he was awake before performing her amateur surgeon act and then tossing it into the garbage disposal. That's some heavy psychological torture for someone to go through. And then to put it in the garbage disposal so that there is no chance of sewing it back on like they did on Bobbitt... Just wow.. She had to have been good and pissed at him.
Well....They were arguing over houseguests.. Hmmm.. Now what sort of argument over "houseguests" can you imagine would end in this guy getting his dick cut off? No, sorry fellas, I gotta do this..
Oh you know the conversation that took place before this.. He must have flirted a little too much with said houseguest and somewhere in that conversation she said... "You want her, don't you?"... And he hesitated just a LITTLE too long before denying it.
When asked for a comment all he would say was, "It's a private matter."
Well seriously, how many men do you know who would be at all willing to talk to the media after something like this happened to them? You know of all the ways to get your 15 minutes of fame, i'm pretty sure this one doesn't rank in many people's top ten.
Ah okay, I don't have the heart to continue with this one..(Fuck, but you KNOW I could!) The court case on this one ought to be real interesting. I mean there is going to be some sort of story here. Remember, Lorena Bobbitt was acquitted.. Hmmmmm.. Errr, but it came out in her trial that he was quite abusive toward her so apparently the jury felt it justified in some way.
Oh just one more.. After Lorenna, the act of cutting off someone's cock was known as a Bobbittizing. Hmmm, ya think now it will be called a "Kieu Cut"?
I know, i'm a sick sadistic bitch.
Right then.. Here's a 22 female submissive in Massachusetts and here's the profile.
"Hello, I just relocated to MA. to be with my Master...He is wonderful so far I have experienced quite a bit in a short time...I have my "room" which is a cell in the basement "they really do exist" I have been kept in chains, peed on, drank pee, spanked , flogged, humiliated, I got picked up at the airport hooded and taken to my new wonderful life."
Yeah, uh i'm trying to imagine someone standing in the middle of the airport wearing a hood. I'm getting the feeling someone wearing a uniform and a gun is going to see this person in the hood and there's a good bet that when someone walks up and starts to lead the hooded person away, they're going to follow.
"Hey Jim, check out the chick with the hood. Where ya think that guy is taking her?"
"I don't know, George.... You think maybe we should follow and see what is going on?"
After 9-11-01, there was an influx of firefighters on the chat sites. Well, since firefighters were being touted as the ultimate hero the horny net geeks (Horny net geeks, there's an archaic phrase for you, late 80's anyone?) became firefighters online to get laid of course.
Well, with how it is now and the current feeling that those in the military are the heroes of course these same people have become soldiers, marines, airmen, and sailors. The latest one to cross my path had one of those fake pictures on his profile and claimed to be a porn producer or something like that.. Wait.. I just HAPPEN to have the conversation right here...
The profile is of a 29 male dominant and 25 female switch in Alabama.. here's the relevant part of his profile..
"I'm looking for men and women wishing to break in the porn market and make some fair money on the way. I have a production company and planning a new website featuring spanking, slave-master, gorean type, d/s, bdsm, lesbians, and stripping. Any interest please message me.
I'm a US Marine (Sgt. Major). I also film pornographic spanking films with my business partner. I'm looking for girls 18-21 interested in being in my films and a possible relationship and my wife is a homemaker."
Okay, first I want to mention that the photo he was trying to pass off as himself was not of a sgt. major at all, but of a staff sergeant. (E-6, three on top and one on the bottom with crossed rifles in the middle. Sgt. Major is 3 on top and 4 on the bottom with either a star or the marine corps emblem in the middle.)
Oh yeah, I should probably also mention the photo is posted in various places about the internet. Errrr, and the cock shot that is now his primary photo. Is also all over the internet..
ANYWAY.. here's the conversation..
"From: gbaileyusmc
Dated:
7/19/11 1:53 AM
I'm looking for men and women wishing to break in the porn market and make some fair money on the way. I have a production company and planning a new website featuring spanking, slave-master, gorean type, d/s, bdsm, lesbians, and stripping. Any interest please message me.
To: gbaileyusmc
Dated:
7/19/11 2:02 AM
LOL.
gbaileyusmc on 7/19/11 at 2:03 AM:
sounds like interest to me.
UltimateDomme on 7/19/11 at 3:52 AM:
Sgt, Major eh? That first photo must be pretty old then.. yes?
gbaileyusmc on 7/19/11 at 4:09 AM:
4 years old, why?
UltimateDomme on 7/19/11 at 4:19 AM:
No reason.. BTW, that photo returns several hits on tineye.. LOL.
gbaileyusmc on 7/19/11 at 4:22 AM:
what is tineye?
UltimateDomme on 7/19/11 at 4:31 AM:
Heheheh, a little program that searches a huge database of photos and finds all the places said photos are posted on the interwebz... that first photo of "you" is all over the place.. :)
gbaileyusmc on 7/19/11 at 4:38 AM:
I looked it up. I only got two results. People post pics everywhere. Its so easy to steal pics and use them on multi-sites. Now with ps you can edit them as you wish. That's America.
UltimateDomme on 7/19/11 at 4:44 AM:
Yep yep yep.. So I take it G.Bailey is who you are?
gbaileyusmc on 7/19/11 at 5:17 AM:
no, thats just what my birth certificate says. lol
UltimateDomme on 7/19/11 at 11:25 AM:
Yeah, pretty interesting seeing that the name on that marine's utilities is Anderson :-P
gbaileyusmc on 7/20/11 at 1:11 AM:
Now, who in their right mind would use their real name on a site like this? The pic is real the name has been changed to protect the innocent. I bet your birth name isn't "UltimateDomme". George Bailey is a stage name. You know like John Wayne's real name was Marion Morrison.
UltimateDomme on 7/20/11 at 2:19 AM:
Ah, so you were lying about the birth certificate, gotcha gomer. Ah, but I see you took off the photo of that marine. Good call, asshole. (Note: Here he did in fact take off the mentioned photo.)
gbaileyusmc on 7/20/11 at 9:14 PM:
I'm on here to discuss business not to debate names and such. I didn't take the pic off. One of my associates needed another pic so they posted it. So you don't want to make money....fine. All you had to say was "no" or just not respond.
UltimateDomme on 7/21/11 at 12:35 AM:
LOL, ya fuckin' liar.
gbaileyusmc on 7/21/11 at 2:16 AM:
Don't you wish. I film pornography. I have a profile that six people uses to find talent. I think we could have made good money putting out domme videos, but I have no interest in filming you any longer. I do take part responsibilty. When you asked about the pic I should told you this is a business and the pics represents more than one person. I didn;t find it important at the time. Profile pics have nothing to do with making money. I like making money and having fun. If you would like to possibly make some money; we'll talk, otherwise buzz off.
UltimateDomme on 7/21/11 at 3:54 AM:
Dude, just keep trolling.. It just pisses me off when assholes like you use photos of servicemen in their fucking profiles on these sites.
I personally don't give a fuck what you claim to do, you're a piece of shit regardless."
He didn't respond again.. LOL
Eh, you gotta love when the story starts to unravel and change on you. Anyway, i'm not on a crusade or anything like that, but i'll never fail to call out these assholes using the photos of servicemen on their profiles when they come under my attention.
I've been doing this shit for just about a year now.. Damn, but i'm long winded eh? I just keep going on and on... Errr..
Anyway, i've been doing this shit for just about a year now and not once has anyone ever been interested in Chuck.. (You remember chuck, don't you? The cocktail waitress who moved back home to his parent's basement?)
Yeah, no one has ever been interested in Chuck... Until now..
This is from a 47 male submissive in Sweden.
"xxxxxxxxxx on 7/20/11 at 1:58 PM:
I like to pamper Chuck instead, is he around?
UltimateDomme on 7/20/11 at 3:12 PM:
No, Chuck moved back to his parent's garage to become some sort of uber warrior or something of the sort on WoW.
xxxxxxxxxx on 7/20/11 at 3:43 PM:
He promised to marry me. Does his parents have a doublegarage?
UltimateDomme on 7/20/11 at 4:01 PM:
Fuck, I don't know.
xxxxxxxxxx on 7/20/11 at 4:05 PM:
Perhaps you can come and live with us but I cant promise anything at the moment.
UltimateDomme on 7/20/11 at 4:06 PM:
Why the fuck would I want to do that?
xxxxxxxxxx on 7/20/11 at 4:08 PM:
He said you were pregnant and he was the father.
UltimateDomme on 7/20/11 at 4:12 PM:
Errr right. Not possible, that little bitch was my cuck LOL
xxxxxxxxxx on 7/20/11 at 4:16 PM:
Yes, he said you drank his beer then fucked him the ass and called him Dolly."
Yep, even Chuck has his admirers... First one, though.. hmmm.. As a point of interest, I NEVER drank Chuck's beer nor did I ever call him Dolly!!!
Okay then.. Here's one of those profiles that seems to be leaving some sort of vital information out. Let me show you.. This is a 19 female slave in Montreal, Canada..
"i am a masochist, looking to serve a sadist.
my current owner needs to kick my ass out of His house.
i have been serving since the age of 8 and got training in being a maid, furniture, object, toilet, producer, shareware.
i am for free but with three conditions:
1 my new Owner will never show any respect to me whatsoever. i must be treated as the most lowly obejct on earth
2 my new Owner will not claim 2 girls i have produced for my current Owner. they are His properties
3 a few limits needs to be honored - fisting, permanent damage, animal sex
only true and natural sadists may apply
please order me for my yahoo
pics on demand and that too through yahoo, not here at CM"
Now, you see this profile and you can't help but wonder what was left off.. I uh.. Have an idea of what was left out...
Condition number 4: You have to be among the stoopidest motherfuckers ever to step foot on this earth to ever fall for this shit.
Heh, whatcha wanna bet when you get this one's Yahoo and you add her, you end up getting sent to one of those pay sites?
So, who wants to be the one to test this theory, eh?
Eh, i'm off to go do something unwholesome.. L8r folks.
http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/article/ALeqM5grVfnCH8wlrsAO5-GOb6ueKIRCRg?docId=90a2b924d63943efa3d2aeab153c2b08
Now I know, it's cruel to laugh at something like that.. But dammit, i'm going to do it anyway!
This woman is much more vicious than Lorenna Bobbitt ever was. I'm serious, Lorenna whacked off John Wayne Bobbitt's little soldier while he was asleep and then tossed it out of the car. (Although it's kind of hard to imagine being able to sleep through that.)
THIS women, Catherine Kieu... drugged his ass, and when he woke up found himself tied up. She waited until he was awake before performing her amateur surgeon act and then tossing it into the garbage disposal. That's some heavy psychological torture for someone to go through. And then to put it in the garbage disposal so that there is no chance of sewing it back on like they did on Bobbitt... Just wow.. She had to have been good and pissed at him.
Well....They were arguing over houseguests.. Hmmm.. Now what sort of argument over "houseguests" can you imagine would end in this guy getting his dick cut off? No, sorry fellas, I gotta do this..
Oh you know the conversation that took place before this.. He must have flirted a little too much with said houseguest and somewhere in that conversation she said... "You want her, don't you?"... And he hesitated just a LITTLE too long before denying it.
When asked for a comment all he would say was, "It's a private matter."
Well seriously, how many men do you know who would be at all willing to talk to the media after something like this happened to them? You know of all the ways to get your 15 minutes of fame, i'm pretty sure this one doesn't rank in many people's top ten.
Ah okay, I don't have the heart to continue with this one..(Fuck, but you KNOW I could!) The court case on this one ought to be real interesting. I mean there is going to be some sort of story here. Remember, Lorena Bobbitt was acquitted.. Hmmmmm.. Errr, but it came out in her trial that he was quite abusive toward her so apparently the jury felt it justified in some way.
Oh just one more.. After Lorenna, the act of cutting off someone's cock was known as a Bobbittizing. Hmmm, ya think now it will be called a "Kieu Cut"?
I know, i'm a sick sadistic bitch.
Right then.. Here's a 22 female submissive in Massachusetts and here's the profile.
"Hello, I just relocated to MA. to be with my Master...He is wonderful so far I have experienced quite a bit in a short time...I have my "room" which is a cell in the basement "they really do exist" I have been kept in chains, peed on, drank pee, spanked , flogged, humiliated, I got picked up at the airport hooded and taken to my new wonderful life."
Yeah, uh i'm trying to imagine someone standing in the middle of the airport wearing a hood. I'm getting the feeling someone wearing a uniform and a gun is going to see this person in the hood and there's a good bet that when someone walks up and starts to lead the hooded person away, they're going to follow.
"Hey Jim, check out the chick with the hood. Where ya think that guy is taking her?"
"I don't know, George.... You think maybe we should follow and see what is going on?"
After 9-11-01, there was an influx of firefighters on the chat sites. Well, since firefighters were being touted as the ultimate hero the horny net geeks (Horny net geeks, there's an archaic phrase for you, late 80's anyone?) became firefighters online to get laid of course.
Well, with how it is now and the current feeling that those in the military are the heroes of course these same people have become soldiers, marines, airmen, and sailors. The latest one to cross my path had one of those fake pictures on his profile and claimed to be a porn producer or something like that.. Wait.. I just HAPPEN to have the conversation right here...
The profile is of a 29 male dominant and 25 female switch in Alabama.. here's the relevant part of his profile..
"I'm looking for men and women wishing to break in the porn market and make some fair money on the way. I have a production company and planning a new website featuring spanking, slave-master, gorean type, d/s, bdsm, lesbians, and stripping. Any interest please message me.
I'm a US Marine (Sgt. Major). I also film pornographic spanking films with my business partner. I'm looking for girls 18-21 interested in being in my films and a possible relationship and my wife is a homemaker."
Okay, first I want to mention that the photo he was trying to pass off as himself was not of a sgt. major at all, but of a staff sergeant. (E-6, three on top and one on the bottom with crossed rifles in the middle. Sgt. Major is 3 on top and 4 on the bottom with either a star or the marine corps emblem in the middle.)
Oh yeah, I should probably also mention the photo is posted in various places about the internet. Errrr, and the cock shot that is now his primary photo. Is also all over the internet..
ANYWAY.. here's the conversation..
"From: gbaileyusmc
Dated:
7/19/11 1:53 AM
I'm looking for men and women wishing to break in the porn market and make some fair money on the way. I have a production company and planning a new website featuring spanking, slave-master, gorean type, d/s, bdsm, lesbians, and stripping. Any interest please message me.
To: gbaileyusmc
Dated:
7/19/11 2:02 AM
LOL.
gbaileyusmc on 7/19/11 at 2:03 AM:
sounds like interest to me.
UltimateDomme on 7/19/11 at 3:52 AM:
Sgt, Major eh? That first photo must be pretty old then.. yes?
gbaileyusmc on 7/19/11 at 4:09 AM:
4 years old, why?
UltimateDomme on 7/19/11 at 4:19 AM:
No reason.. BTW, that photo returns several hits on tineye.. LOL.
gbaileyusmc on 7/19/11 at 4:22 AM:
what is tineye?
UltimateDomme on 7/19/11 at 4:31 AM:
Heheheh, a little program that searches a huge database of photos and finds all the places said photos are posted on the interwebz... that first photo of "you" is all over the place.. :)
gbaileyusmc on 7/19/11 at 4:38 AM:
I looked it up. I only got two results. People post pics everywhere. Its so easy to steal pics and use them on multi-sites. Now with ps you can edit them as you wish. That's America.
UltimateDomme on 7/19/11 at 4:44 AM:
Yep yep yep.. So I take it G.Bailey is who you are?
gbaileyusmc on 7/19/11 at 5:17 AM:
no, thats just what my birth certificate says. lol
UltimateDomme on 7/19/11 at 11:25 AM:
Yeah, pretty interesting seeing that the name on that marine's utilities is Anderson :-P
gbaileyusmc on 7/20/11 at 1:11 AM:
Now, who in their right mind would use their real name on a site like this? The pic is real the name has been changed to protect the innocent. I bet your birth name isn't "UltimateDomme". George Bailey is a stage name. You know like John Wayne's real name was Marion Morrison.
UltimateDomme on 7/20/11 at 2:19 AM:
Ah, so you were lying about the birth certificate, gotcha gomer. Ah, but I see you took off the photo of that marine. Good call, asshole. (Note: Here he did in fact take off the mentioned photo.)
gbaileyusmc on 7/20/11 at 9:14 PM:
I'm on here to discuss business not to debate names and such. I didn't take the pic off. One of my associates needed another pic so they posted it. So you don't want to make money....fine. All you had to say was "no" or just not respond.
UltimateDomme on 7/21/11 at 12:35 AM:
LOL, ya fuckin' liar.
gbaileyusmc on 7/21/11 at 2:16 AM:
Don't you wish. I film pornography. I have a profile that six people uses to find talent. I think we could have made good money putting out domme videos, but I have no interest in filming you any longer. I do take part responsibilty. When you asked about the pic I should told you this is a business and the pics represents more than one person. I didn;t find it important at the time. Profile pics have nothing to do with making money. I like making money and having fun. If you would like to possibly make some money; we'll talk, otherwise buzz off.
UltimateDomme on 7/21/11 at 3:54 AM:
Dude, just keep trolling.. It just pisses me off when assholes like you use photos of servicemen in their fucking profiles on these sites.
I personally don't give a fuck what you claim to do, you're a piece of shit regardless."
He didn't respond again.. LOL
Eh, you gotta love when the story starts to unravel and change on you. Anyway, i'm not on a crusade or anything like that, but i'll never fail to call out these assholes using the photos of servicemen on their profiles when they come under my attention.
I've been doing this shit for just about a year now.. Damn, but i'm long winded eh? I just keep going on and on... Errr..
Anyway, i've been doing this shit for just about a year now and not once has anyone ever been interested in Chuck.. (You remember chuck, don't you? The cocktail waitress who moved back home to his parent's basement?)
Yeah, no one has ever been interested in Chuck... Until now..
This is from a 47 male submissive in Sweden.
"xxxxxxxxxx on 7/20/11 at 1:58 PM:
I like to pamper Chuck instead, is he around?
UltimateDomme on 7/20/11 at 3:12 PM:
No, Chuck moved back to his parent's garage to become some sort of uber warrior or something of the sort on WoW.
xxxxxxxxxx on 7/20/11 at 3:43 PM:
He promised to marry me. Does his parents have a doublegarage?
UltimateDomme on 7/20/11 at 4:01 PM:
Fuck, I don't know.
xxxxxxxxxx on 7/20/11 at 4:05 PM:
Perhaps you can come and live with us but I cant promise anything at the moment.
UltimateDomme on 7/20/11 at 4:06 PM:
Why the fuck would I want to do that?
xxxxxxxxxx on 7/20/11 at 4:08 PM:
He said you were pregnant and he was the father.
UltimateDomme on 7/20/11 at 4:12 PM:
Errr right. Not possible, that little bitch was my cuck LOL
xxxxxxxxxx on 7/20/11 at 4:16 PM:
Yes, he said you drank his beer then fucked him the ass and called him Dolly."
Yep, even Chuck has his admirers... First one, though.. hmmm.. As a point of interest, I NEVER drank Chuck's beer nor did I ever call him Dolly!!!
Okay then.. Here's one of those profiles that seems to be leaving some sort of vital information out. Let me show you.. This is a 19 female slave in Montreal, Canada..
"i am a masochist, looking to serve a sadist.
my current owner needs to kick my ass out of His house.
i have been serving since the age of 8 and got training in being a maid, furniture, object, toilet, producer, shareware.
i am for free but with three conditions:
1 my new Owner will never show any respect to me whatsoever. i must be treated as the most lowly obejct on earth
2 my new Owner will not claim 2 girls i have produced for my current Owner. they are His properties
3 a few limits needs to be honored - fisting, permanent damage, animal sex
only true and natural sadists may apply
please order me for my yahoo
pics on demand and that too through yahoo, not here at CM"
Now, you see this profile and you can't help but wonder what was left off.. I uh.. Have an idea of what was left out...
Condition number 4: You have to be among the stoopidest motherfuckers ever to step foot on this earth to ever fall for this shit.
Heh, whatcha wanna bet when you get this one's Yahoo and you add her, you end up getting sent to one of those pay sites?
So, who wants to be the one to test this theory, eh?
Eh, i'm off to go do something unwholesome.. L8r folks.
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
Only a politician can stick their hand in your pocket, take all your money and then convince you that you're somehow richer for it.
Oh shit! Is she about to get political on this motherfucker?
Nah, I just thought having that image of a politician in mind would be a good lead in to this first profile. This profile caused me to get stomach pains when I read it. Errr, the good kind of stomach pains, yanno from laughing.
This is a 46 dominant in California and if you can't see a politician's hand in this profile.. Wait.. here it is..
"I am a naturally dominant, successful white man who is now looking for a role as a “house-husband” for a hard charging, driven woman. I have done my time in the corporate world…risen to the level of VP, so I understand the stress, the issues and the struggles of climbing the corporate latter. My ideal situation would be with a career woman who wants a relationship where she can focus on her career during the day, but be a submissive woman at night…I take care of the house…run the household and you bring home the bacon…so I am looking for a female power-sub…"
Oh come on now, don't you think this is a cool way to say, "I wanna sit home while YOU go out and work"? Ahh, let's see if he gets more detailed..
"Don’t make any mistake…I am not submissive….and I very confident and comfortable. I have standards. Not only do you need to be driven to high achievement, you need to be sexy, in shape and very intelligent in order to keep my attention and my affections…I am also very presentable - clean cut, attractive, in great shape if I need to accompany you to social events.
A younger woman on her way up will find that I am able to guide, mentor and coach while taking care of everything else in her life.....an older woman will find that my understanding of her needs and my ability to push her along will be invaluable in tacking those struggles in getting to and keeping that coveted corner office..."
He doessssssssss get more detailed! Errrr, Now let's break this down and see if we can as a group come to the same conclusion...
Right then, she has to be driven to high achievement... mmmkay... She has to be sexy...in shape...and very intelligent...
Yeah okay.. let's just say you're a woman who is driven to high standards, sexy and in shape..and very intelligent. What in the blue monkey hell would she want with this guy who aspires to sit at home and sponge from you?
Ehhh, giving him the benefit of the doubt.. He's probably not alone in wanting the above situation.. Heh, to be a trophy husband.
Here's one from someone who obvious got tired of hearing from people no matter what she put in her profile. This is a 49 female submissive from Belgium and this little bit of sarcasm tickled me..
"but, why should i bother updating ?
it's a well known fact that :
a True Dom doesn't need to read a profile. The sub is supposed to know what he likes and to be that way."
Oh yeah, stick that knife in and twist.
A few days ago I was browsing and this profile pops up on my screen.. A 23 female submissive in California.
"I have a theory about some Dominant men. The type I speak of are the sort of people who more than likely have some deep seated hatred for women. My theory is they are wimps using BDSM as an excuse to be abusive toward women."
I read that profile and thought to myself that this is someone who for whatever reason wanted to incite a riot or something of the sort. Sure enough a couple of days later this profile added the following journal entry.
"1 profile, 1 obvious truism, 1 provocative statement,1 week.
64 pages of messages agreeing but it certainly does not include THEM, 6 pages of attempts to justify it, 2 pages of offers to show me the way, 1 page of "well then why are you here" messages.
12 offers to submit to me, 7 couples trying to add me to their home, 4 attempts to pick a fight, 2 flat out admissions, 2 that's why they went lez messages, 1 offer to move to Alaska, 1 offer to join a traveling ren faire geek, 1 attempted hypnotism, 1 offer of a massage.
It was a very good week.
I love this site."
Errrrr... Now I dunno for sure, but it sure looks to me like this person is trying to rickroll (You know rick rolling? The song never gonna give you up? Please don't make me link it again!) the entire site... Ummm, and judging from that list and make no mistake folks, women do get that volume of messages when they're new... I'd say the rick rolling attempt has been successful.
Here's one that i'm sure is going to end up joining the Order of the Amazonian Templars.. She's gotta.. This is a 29 female dominant in New York.. Now let's have some giggles.. Err, I mean here's some of the profile.
"Teutonic-Nordic Mistress descended from the dominant race of the Norse and Teutons. Casts total mental, spiritual, sexual and physical control on her subs. Owns a realtime harem of devout Handmaidens and a stable of Studs, but will give opportunity to worthy and qualified online female subs, tested in online interaction, and if anyone may qualify, to be called upon to meet in real for screening and initiation. Only those who pass shall be ordained for realtime intensive and comprehensive slave training, and only by passing this may result in collaring and induction to the harem."
Right then.. here's someone with a whole fucking harem of "devout" Handmaidens and a stable of studs.. Uhh, but is looking for online female subs... Err for testing in online interaction.. (Translation: Will need to perform on webcam... multiple times.. before she rejects your dumb ass.)
Now, this errrr person has three photos and she goes on toward the end of the profile to address the "brutes" who have cast doubts upon the authenticity of her photos.. Wait, this is funny.
"A few unthinking brutes in this site have questioned my validity as a person because of the photos I have posted on my profile and their inability to use their minds in processing the relevance of the pics. I normally just simply ignore messages from mindless individuals in this site and unfortunately I ignore unbelievably so many. Very few messages trickle through to be favorably considered for reading, and even fewer result in correspondences. But one or two that succeed in getting into my personal system do have quality and are much better and more preferable than the multitude who end up in the garbage dumps.
But to let future interested parties know about the history of these pics and their relevance, I will give the information.
The pic of me by the Lotus sportscar was taken when I was 16, headed to a celebrity fashion event. The car belongs to my late Dad s collection of 14 exotic European sportscars (Dad passed away when I was 19). As one can clearly see, I am entering the car on the right passenger side. Dad was driving for me. *smiles*
The second photo causes the most number of numbskull comments from unthinking brutes. Indeed, that is the twin towers of the World Trade Center in the background, which was brought down on 9/11/01. Right.
I am riding a fast cabin cruiser that took me from a dock at Battery Park City to a 150-ft superyacht owned by one of my closest friends. Later on the evening of that day, on board the yacht, I hosted my 19th birthday, a party exclusive to my closest intimate friends and allies. where we partied for 3 straight days and 3 nights while the yacht cruised around the Atlantic within 500 miles of the NYC coast. Yes, it was my 19th birthday, and the date the photo was taken was 9/07/01, just 4 days before the attack on the WTC towers.
You think I am going to take that pic down? Nacht. Eat your hearts out, brutes.
The yellow car is just one of my cars, still in my collection. Pic was taken last year. Who cares about this pic? Just me and a car. LOL. I am not about to show my newest cars and current pics of me, as that would reveal too much of me. Enough to know that even a car as old as my Dad s Lotus and the WTC can cause so much drooling and hostile envy from despicably less-fortunate destitute souls."
Eh, gotta love the detail in explaining each photo.
I know that bit was long, but with my hand it's better for me to copy and paste more if I wanna crank out this stuff.. BUT.. But along with the detail in which she explains each of the pictures, I was able to make some observations about two of these three pictures.
The one on the boat (fast cabin cruiser) shows a woman sitting on the back of this boat and the boat is moving. You can tell the boat is moving because of the wake behind the boat. Now, the woman in this photo is dressed in the usual boating attire.... complete with three inch heels..(Smirk) and her hair is hanging straight down as if the boat were not moving...
Oh wait.. the shadow this person casts looks to be extending to the actual wake in the water.. This is a photoshopped picture.
The 2nd photo is a picture of some sort of yellow sports cars with a person in the driver's seat and is pinned back as if the car is going like.. really fast... As sports cars of this type are subject to do... Now, look closer at the driver.. it's a mannequin. JUST SAYIN!!!
Now, it doesn't take that sort of observational effort to know this one is full of shit, but it's sure fun to do sometimes.
One more bit before I go.. I do like to check on those giggle a minute fake catching websites and most recently i've mentioned the one called collarmefakes.com.. In specific how they posted this list and used as a criteria that they did not answer messages..
Ah, well they've settled in to where they are posting specific names and the reason they believe they are fake.. Cool, but this site has done something I find very interesting. (Read as lulzworthy)
Some woman posted to the specific thread with the huge list and basically told them that it was a piss poor reason for calling them fake... what do they do? Welllllllllll.. they made this person a moderator of a newly created forum.... for profiles with multiple tineye hits...
The lulz come in when you take a look at who this moderator is.. The person who is a moderator on this fake catching website is a 24 female slave in Maryland and the profile reads like something right out of those red covered paperbacks.. Speaks of playing tie-up games at 6..having her holes experimented with by various objects at 8... And then searching for her first master at 12... Cause by then she knew the lifestlye was what she was meant to do, yanno?
"At the age of 12 i started to look for a Master on websites. Took a lot of trail and error, to find the right Master for me. i had 2 "Masters" previously. Both of which did not work out. One of them was no Master. He was just a dick. He would kick my head into walls, stomp on my hands, tried to light me on fire, and when i was modeling and he wasn't getting any work, he threatened me and cut me (Not in a fun or safe way). After being placed in many life threatening and dangerous situations, where there was no control over my safety by both myself and him, i left.
The second Master i had, i relocated from NY to California to serve him, however the moment I got there he wanted a boyfriend/girlfriend dynamic. That did not last long.
Since then my search as led me to my current Master."
Hmm, and what websites would you imagine a 12 year old girl would look for a master?
Yep yep yep, collarmefakes.com.. You keep on rooting out them fakes.. It's fucking vital work it is.
Later, folks.
Oh shit! Is she about to get political on this motherfucker?
Nah, I just thought having that image of a politician in mind would be a good lead in to this first profile. This profile caused me to get stomach pains when I read it. Errr, the good kind of stomach pains, yanno from laughing.
This is a 46 dominant in California and if you can't see a politician's hand in this profile.. Wait.. here it is..
"I am a naturally dominant, successful white man who is now looking for a role as a “house-husband” for a hard charging, driven woman. I have done my time in the corporate world…risen to the level of VP, so I understand the stress, the issues and the struggles of climbing the corporate latter. My ideal situation would be with a career woman who wants a relationship where she can focus on her career during the day, but be a submissive woman at night…I take care of the house…run the household and you bring home the bacon…so I am looking for a female power-sub…"
Oh come on now, don't you think this is a cool way to say, "I wanna sit home while YOU go out and work"? Ahh, let's see if he gets more detailed..
"Don’t make any mistake…I am not submissive….and I very confident and comfortable. I have standards. Not only do you need to be driven to high achievement, you need to be sexy, in shape and very intelligent in order to keep my attention and my affections…I am also very presentable - clean cut, attractive, in great shape if I need to accompany you to social events.
A younger woman on her way up will find that I am able to guide, mentor and coach while taking care of everything else in her life.....an older woman will find that my understanding of her needs and my ability to push her along will be invaluable in tacking those struggles in getting to and keeping that coveted corner office..."
He doessssssssss get more detailed! Errrr, Now let's break this down and see if we can as a group come to the same conclusion...
Right then, she has to be driven to high achievement... mmmkay... She has to be sexy...in shape...and very intelligent...
Yeah okay.. let's just say you're a woman who is driven to high standards, sexy and in shape..and very intelligent. What in the blue monkey hell would she want with this guy who aspires to sit at home and sponge from you?
Ehhh, giving him the benefit of the doubt.. He's probably not alone in wanting the above situation.. Heh, to be a trophy husband.
Here's one from someone who obvious got tired of hearing from people no matter what she put in her profile. This is a 49 female submissive from Belgium and this little bit of sarcasm tickled me..
"but, why should i bother updating ?
it's a well known fact that :
a True Dom doesn't need to read a profile. The sub is supposed to know what he likes and to be that way."
Oh yeah, stick that knife in and twist.
A few days ago I was browsing and this profile pops up on my screen.. A 23 female submissive in California.
"I have a theory about some Dominant men. The type I speak of are the sort of people who more than likely have some deep seated hatred for women. My theory is they are wimps using BDSM as an excuse to be abusive toward women."
I read that profile and thought to myself that this is someone who for whatever reason wanted to incite a riot or something of the sort. Sure enough a couple of days later this profile added the following journal entry.
"1 profile, 1 obvious truism, 1 provocative statement,1 week.
64 pages of messages agreeing but it certainly does not include THEM, 6 pages of attempts to justify it, 2 pages of offers to show me the way, 1 page of "well then why are you here" messages.
12 offers to submit to me, 7 couples trying to add me to their home, 4 attempts to pick a fight, 2 flat out admissions, 2 that's why they went lez messages, 1 offer to move to Alaska, 1 offer to join a traveling ren faire geek, 1 attempted hypnotism, 1 offer of a massage.
It was a very good week.
I love this site."
Errrrr... Now I dunno for sure, but it sure looks to me like this person is trying to rickroll (You know rick rolling? The song never gonna give you up? Please don't make me link it again!) the entire site... Ummm, and judging from that list and make no mistake folks, women do get that volume of messages when they're new... I'd say the rick rolling attempt has been successful.
Here's one that i'm sure is going to end up joining the Order of the Amazonian Templars.. She's gotta.. This is a 29 female dominant in New York.. Now let's have some giggles.. Err, I mean here's some of the profile.
"Teutonic-Nordic Mistress descended from the dominant race of the Norse and Teutons. Casts total mental, spiritual, sexual and physical control on her subs. Owns a realtime harem of devout Handmaidens and a stable of Studs, but will give opportunity to worthy and qualified online female subs, tested in online interaction, and if anyone may qualify, to be called upon to meet in real for screening and initiation. Only those who pass shall be ordained for realtime intensive and comprehensive slave training, and only by passing this may result in collaring and induction to the harem."
Right then.. here's someone with a whole fucking harem of "devout" Handmaidens and a stable of studs.. Uhh, but is looking for online female subs... Err for testing in online interaction.. (Translation: Will need to perform on webcam... multiple times.. before she rejects your dumb ass.)
Now, this errrr person has three photos and she goes on toward the end of the profile to address the "brutes" who have cast doubts upon the authenticity of her photos.. Wait, this is funny.
"A few unthinking brutes in this site have questioned my validity as a person because of the photos I have posted on my profile and their inability to use their minds in processing the relevance of the pics. I normally just simply ignore messages from mindless individuals in this site and unfortunately I ignore unbelievably so many. Very few messages trickle through to be favorably considered for reading, and even fewer result in correspondences. But one or two that succeed in getting into my personal system do have quality and are much better and more preferable than the multitude who end up in the garbage dumps.
But to let future interested parties know about the history of these pics and their relevance, I will give the information.
The pic of me by the Lotus sportscar was taken when I was 16, headed to a celebrity fashion event. The car belongs to my late Dad s collection of 14 exotic European sportscars (Dad passed away when I was 19). As one can clearly see, I am entering the car on the right passenger side. Dad was driving for me. *smiles*
The second photo causes the most number of numbskull comments from unthinking brutes. Indeed, that is the twin towers of the World Trade Center in the background, which was brought down on 9/11/01. Right.
I am riding a fast cabin cruiser that took me from a dock at Battery Park City to a 150-ft superyacht owned by one of my closest friends. Later on the evening of that day, on board the yacht, I hosted my 19th birthday, a party exclusive to my closest intimate friends and allies. where we partied for 3 straight days and 3 nights while the yacht cruised around the Atlantic within 500 miles of the NYC coast. Yes, it was my 19th birthday, and the date the photo was taken was 9/07/01, just 4 days before the attack on the WTC towers.
You think I am going to take that pic down? Nacht. Eat your hearts out, brutes.
The yellow car is just one of my cars, still in my collection. Pic was taken last year. Who cares about this pic? Just me and a car. LOL. I am not about to show my newest cars and current pics of me, as that would reveal too much of me. Enough to know that even a car as old as my Dad s Lotus and the WTC can cause so much drooling and hostile envy from despicably less-fortunate destitute souls."
Eh, gotta love the detail in explaining each photo.
I know that bit was long, but with my hand it's better for me to copy and paste more if I wanna crank out this stuff.. BUT.. But along with the detail in which she explains each of the pictures, I was able to make some observations about two of these three pictures.
The one on the boat (fast cabin cruiser) shows a woman sitting on the back of this boat and the boat is moving. You can tell the boat is moving because of the wake behind the boat. Now, the woman in this photo is dressed in the usual boating attire.... complete with three inch heels..(Smirk) and her hair is hanging straight down as if the boat were not moving...
Oh wait.. the shadow this person casts looks to be extending to the actual wake in the water.. This is a photoshopped picture.
The 2nd photo is a picture of some sort of yellow sports cars with a person in the driver's seat and is pinned back as if the car is going like.. really fast... As sports cars of this type are subject to do... Now, look closer at the driver.. it's a mannequin. JUST SAYIN!!!
Now, it doesn't take that sort of observational effort to know this one is full of shit, but it's sure fun to do sometimes.
One more bit before I go.. I do like to check on those giggle a minute fake catching websites and most recently i've mentioned the one called collarmefakes.com.. In specific how they posted this list and used as a criteria that they did not answer messages..
Ah, well they've settled in to where they are posting specific names and the reason they believe they are fake.. Cool, but this site has done something I find very interesting. (Read as lulzworthy)
Some woman posted to the specific thread with the huge list and basically told them that it was a piss poor reason for calling them fake... what do they do? Welllllllllll.. they made this person a moderator of a newly created forum.... for profiles with multiple tineye hits...
The lulz come in when you take a look at who this moderator is.. The person who is a moderator on this fake catching website is a 24 female slave in Maryland and the profile reads like something right out of those red covered paperbacks.. Speaks of playing tie-up games at 6..having her holes experimented with by various objects at 8... And then searching for her first master at 12... Cause by then she knew the lifestlye was what she was meant to do, yanno?
"At the age of 12 i started to look for a Master on websites. Took a lot of trail and error, to find the right Master for me. i had 2 "Masters" previously. Both of which did not work out. One of them was no Master. He was just a dick. He would kick my head into walls, stomp on my hands, tried to light me on fire, and when i was modeling and he wasn't getting any work, he threatened me and cut me (Not in a fun or safe way). After being placed in many life threatening and dangerous situations, where there was no control over my safety by both myself and him, i left.
The second Master i had, i relocated from NY to California to serve him, however the moment I got there he wanted a boyfriend/girlfriend dynamic. That did not last long.
Since then my search as led me to my current Master."
Hmm, and what websites would you imagine a 12 year old girl would look for a master?
Yep yep yep, collarmefakes.com.. You keep on rooting out them fakes.. It's fucking vital work it is.
Later, folks.
Thursday, June 16, 2011
Awwwwwww shit here I am again.. to pass along the lulz.. So lemme get right to it..
First a quick news update on that masterjaz person I spoke of last entry, his profile has gone into hiding. Good for him, stay hidden asshole. Also, that alphacharlie shitbag now has three new profiles. The names are RulerofWomen with 1 and 7 appended to the end of the name of the other two... Same profile as before...picture of a different soldier. He's now a 30 Dominant in Mississippi. Maybe he has more that are hidden, who knows? But let's alllllll give him a warm welcome!!
Now, you've all seen those profiles where the person talks about being trained by/worked with the greatest masters in the known universe, yes yes? Hmm, here's one who also posts that sort of brag... And it's pretty funny.
This is 24 female dominant in Alabama.. and here's the first paragraph in her profile...
"I am a sweet southern belle on the outside with lace, but alone I am a Cat who will take total control of you. Are you ready to be used, abused, controlled. I am not here for your pleasure, but only for mine. I have worked with the best on line Domme in the country. I am here for just a few things, and you will do as I say"
She worked with the best online domme in the country, huh? mmmkay then.
Now to be clear this is one of those financial cunts, but I realllllllllly wanna know how the fuck someone gets to be classified as the best online domme in the country. Come on now, let the imagination run wild on this and just think of what sort of competition that would be involved in deciding this issue. At the end of this competition the winners would of course get a printshopped certificate saying she's the top domme and gain the right to wear the title until the next year when they hold it again... Something like the Miss America bit without the evening gown and swimsuit competition.
Ahh, I don't know what events would be in those online domme olympics but if there's a creative complaining event I have a contender for you..
This is a 49 female dominant in Ohio... The profile itself is the typical, "I'm the fucking domme and yours is but to serve at my feet" sort of shit and in all caps to boot. The end of the profile contains this line..
"ALSO KEEP AN EYE ON MY JOURNALS; IT'S EDUCATIONAL !!!"
Right, so I start reading the journals and discover she's been on the site since Jan. and from the first day she's complaining about the site and the people who are sending her messages.... Several times in these whines she states that the site is useless and so on and so forth.... Yet here it is the middle of June and still she's here complaining about anything and everything on the site.
Yeah, I thought it was hilarious to read so I favorited the profile.. Yanno, for the education we were promised in her profile...Errrr right?
I get a message from her that says, "Question? What makes a Domme admire another Domme?"
Heh.. I send back this reply.. "Answer, because your profile and journals are fucking funny."
She didn't like that..... sends back another question.. "Fucking funny?"
So I answered her again... and discovered I was blocked. *giggle*
I have a sneaking suspicion this one would be damn near impossible to please.. One little thing and she'd go all bitch cakes on you.. Her profile keeps changing as well.. hmmmm.
Here's one that you have to read both the profile and the latest journal before you see the lulz.. But they're there..
This is a 33 male switch in Utah... and here's the first paragraph of his profile..
"I am very experienced in all forms of BDSM and D/s, 15 plus years, I am switch with very few limits, however I'm not interested in switching with the same person. I prefer sensual domination, however VERY STRICT AND SADISTIC at the same time."
Right, soaked it in? committed to memory? Good, good.. here's the latest journal..
"I mean no offense to anyone so please try not to be offended... But the ''Dominant'' women (girls) that are 18, 19, 20 years old that claim they are ''real'' and try to talk so ''Dominant'' in their profiles just crack me up. Sorry but from my EXPERIENCE someone that young really has no idea what it's all about....they're not old enough to have had experience to really get it....just my observation....again no offense intended..... "
Yeah.. uhhhh... So let us review... he's 33 with over 15 years experience.. mmmkay.. and here he is saying that women who are 18-20 are somehow clueless because of it.
Well, the hypocricy is clear enough.. But I see this a lot.. People with stated experience levels that had them starting out in BDSM when they were that young... Yet they feel some need to say when you're that young you can't know what it's all about.
Actually what he's saying is that to be that young you really don't know what it's like to be dominant.(I say that because in his profile he states he is looking for subs 18-35 but for dommes they need to be older, 35ish) I think he's full of shit, but it goes beyond this one profile.
Now, we can probably correctly assume these are the sort of people who believe that one must know what it is like first hand to be a submissive before they can ever hope to be a successful dominant. And there are many who feel this way but to them I say bullshit. Just because someone talked YOU into serving as a submissive to some dom/me as a way to "learn" don't go around thinking this is how it must be.
Granted, when someone is 18-20 it's simply not possible to have the sort of experience that makes them an expert or whatever, (This goes for all of you) but you'd be badly mistaken to believe those same people don't know what it's about... Especially now with the oodles and oodles of information easily available to nearly everyone.
Oh but it was different back in the old guard days. Yeah, different.. and not at all easy to break into when most of the BDSM clubs stayed underground. If anything, it's easier today because of the readily available information, the many munches and educational functions.. etc.
Here's a profile where it's just plain funny to see the difference between what it says and WHAT it says....Huh? Wait....
This is a 99 female switch from Washington and here's the first paragraph of the profile as written..
"First off this girl's Dom reads her profile so,Doms will be sent to bulk.. this is a message from her Dom."
Okay, that's what it says.. but let's rewrite that for what it really SAYS, eh?
"This girl belongs to me, Master CockJockey. I monitor this girl's profile and will send all messages from other Doms to bulk because like I don't share and stuff and I don't trust her to do as I say and not talk to other Doms so i've taken matters into my own hands and will not take any chances."
Oh okay, that was too easy.
Especially after seeing this journal from a 47 female switch in California. The journal is a couple of years old so you may have seen this... if not, fasten your seatbelts.
"The D/s BS Translator:
1. "Your submission is a precious gift - it should not be given
lightly." [Translation: So how about you stop putting out all over
town?]
2. "My role is to help you identify then stretch your limits"
[Translation: limits schmimits....let's do what I like for a change.]
3. "My pet, you seem to be struggling with your submission - that is a
natural feeling." [Translation: Any more smart ass back chat from you
and you'll be kicked to the curb.]
4. "You seem troubled my pet. We should talk." [Translation: Your
sulking is giving me the shits.]
5. "You are so wonderfully responsive" [Translation: You wail like a
banshee and move around so much I want to hit every major
organ....including your brain.]
6. "It is only in being owned that you will ever be completely free."
[Translation: I need some shmuck to give up his own life to wait on me
hand and foot without payment.]
7. "I have 20 years experience" [Translation: 20 years ago I tied
someone to the bed and last week I tried it again.]
8. "For me, the ritual of aftercare is the most important part of our scene"
[Translation: Because that is when you stagger off to get me a drink.]
9. "A true Dom has humility and never stops learning." [Translation:
Yeah, so I fucked up again: don't give me that accusing look, you big
sook.]
10. "I never, ever strike in anger." [Translation: It just feels that
way when you give me shit.]
11. It is time we explored polyamory together." [Translation: It is
time I bonked other people. You can help me pick them up and be my
excuse to get rid of them afterward]
12. "I cannot meet you at a BDSM club because I am a very private
person." [Translation: I cannot meet you at a BDSM club because I am a
very married person.]
13. "I trained as a Domina in Europe in my early 20s." [Translation: I
had a kinky shag when backpacking around Europe after Uni.]
14. "SM? Don't think of it as pain. Think of it as intense sensation."
[Translation: This is going to hurt like hell, but I am almost certain
a big man like is going to be too proud to safeword and stop the party.]
15. "You can only be a truly successful Dominant if you have
submitted." [Translation: I want you to sub to me, and that sounds
like a legit reason you might actually consider it.]
16. "You must master your own life before you can master another's."
[Translation: You need to have a 20-thousand square foot house and be
pulling down at least 250k a year or the deal's are all off buddy. As
a sub, I need to be accommodated in the style I would like to become
accustomed to.]
17."I have no limits." [Translation: Until you go beyond what is legal
so I can have you charged, convicted and sue you to live the rest of
my life off the proceeds]
18. "That's not a Dom--that's a control freak." [Translation: Get rid
of that guy I wanna be your Dom cuz I hear you give good head.]
19. "All Dommes need is to find the right man." [Translation: Cuz I'm IT!]
20. "You aren't sub enough." [Translation: I can't handle a guy with a
mind of his own without resorting to cheap manipulation.]
21. "You're not submissive enough." [Translation: Because you won't
quit your management job, move to Nebraska today and give me oral sex
on the off-hand promise I might actually start a relationship with you.]
22. "You're not Dominant Enough" [Translation: You're no fun. You
won't maim me permanently and it's always been my biggest fantasy.]
The D/s BS Translator for Online Profiles:
23. "I'm service-oriented." [Translation: I hope the dumb sap falls
for this so he'll let me clean his place and I can snoop through his
shit.]
24. "I'm under consideration." [Translation: I'm chasing someone.]
25. "I've been released." [Translation: I've been dumped.]
26. "I am a true dom/sub." [Translation: You're a phony if you aren't
just like me.]
27. "I am a bratty sub." [Translation: I am a pain in the ass.]
28. "I will bend you to my will." [Translation: I am insane.]
29. "I am a submissive with slave tendencies." [Translation: Pick me
because I'm pretending to be subbier (or better) than a regular
submissive.]
31. "I am seeking my One." [Translation: Someone out there must have
dysfunctions which are compatible with mine.]
32. "I'm trained." [Translation: I will drive you nuts doing exactly
what my last master wanted.]
33. "I am a 24/7 slave, online only." [Translation: I am a bored housewife.]
34. "I'm strict but fair." [Translation: I'm always right, you're
always wrong, and I'll beat you whenever you're right and I don't want
to admit it.]
35. "I am a trainer of sluts." [Translation: I'm looking for girls
who will believe they are being "trained" when I order them to blow me.]
36. "Looking for a sub/slave/girl to join us." [Translation (when
posted by a sub/slave/girl): I am much too lazy to clean the house and
I need a work horse. Translation (when posted by the dominant): I need
a backup fuck for when she's mad at me. Bonus points if you'll take my
side in the argument.]"
Heh, so much for this blog.. that journal says it all. *laughing*.
And now for a little humor injected into the blog, this is a 44 dominant in the UK.. Check the profile..
"A little pissed off with this women saying there into certain things and really they dont have a clue what bdsm is."
Now... the profile picture? Oh yeah, it's of a guy in a Darth Vader costume.. I'm just sayin'!!!
First a quick news update on that masterjaz person I spoke of last entry, his profile has gone into hiding. Good for him, stay hidden asshole. Also, that alphacharlie shitbag now has three new profiles. The names are RulerofWomen with 1 and 7 appended to the end of the name of the other two... Same profile as before...picture of a different soldier. He's now a 30 Dominant in Mississippi. Maybe he has more that are hidden, who knows? But let's alllllll give him a warm welcome!!
Now, you've all seen those profiles where the person talks about being trained by/worked with the greatest masters in the known universe, yes yes? Hmm, here's one who also posts that sort of brag... And it's pretty funny.
This is 24 female dominant in Alabama.. and here's the first paragraph in her profile...
"I am a sweet southern belle on the outside with lace, but alone I am a Cat who will take total control of you. Are you ready to be used, abused, controlled. I am not here for your pleasure, but only for mine. I have worked with the best on line Domme in the country. I am here for just a few things, and you will do as I say"
She worked with the best online domme in the country, huh? mmmkay then.
Now to be clear this is one of those financial cunts, but I realllllllllly wanna know how the fuck someone gets to be classified as the best online domme in the country. Come on now, let the imagination run wild on this and just think of what sort of competition that would be involved in deciding this issue. At the end of this competition the winners would of course get a printshopped certificate saying she's the top domme and gain the right to wear the title until the next year when they hold it again... Something like the Miss America bit without the evening gown and swimsuit competition.
Ahh, I don't know what events would be in those online domme olympics but if there's a creative complaining event I have a contender for you..
This is a 49 female dominant in Ohio... The profile itself is the typical, "I'm the fucking domme and yours is but to serve at my feet" sort of shit and in all caps to boot. The end of the profile contains this line..
"ALSO KEEP AN EYE ON MY JOURNALS; IT'S EDUCATIONAL !!!"
Right, so I start reading the journals and discover she's been on the site since Jan. and from the first day she's complaining about the site and the people who are sending her messages.... Several times in these whines she states that the site is useless and so on and so forth.... Yet here it is the middle of June and still she's here complaining about anything and everything on the site.
Yeah, I thought it was hilarious to read so I favorited the profile.. Yanno, for the education we were promised in her profile...Errrr right?
I get a message from her that says, "Question? What makes a Domme admire another Domme?"
Heh.. I send back this reply.. "Answer, because your profile and journals are fucking funny."
She didn't like that..... sends back another question.. "Fucking funny?"
So I answered her again... and discovered I was blocked. *giggle*
I have a sneaking suspicion this one would be damn near impossible to please.. One little thing and she'd go all bitch cakes on you.. Her profile keeps changing as well.. hmmmm.
Here's one that you have to read both the profile and the latest journal before you see the lulz.. But they're there..
This is a 33 male switch in Utah... and here's the first paragraph of his profile..
"I am very experienced in all forms of BDSM and D/s, 15 plus years, I am switch with very few limits, however I'm not interested in switching with the same person. I prefer sensual domination, however VERY STRICT AND SADISTIC at the same time."
Right, soaked it in? committed to memory? Good, good.. here's the latest journal..
"I mean no offense to anyone so please try not to be offended... But the ''Dominant'' women (girls) that are 18, 19, 20 years old that claim they are ''real'' and try to talk so ''Dominant'' in their profiles just crack me up. Sorry but from my EXPERIENCE someone that young really has no idea what it's all about....they're not old enough to have had experience to really get it....just my observation....again no offense intended..... "
Yeah.. uhhhh... So let us review... he's 33 with over 15 years experience.. mmmkay.. and here he is saying that women who are 18-20 are somehow clueless because of it.
Well, the hypocricy is clear enough.. But I see this a lot.. People with stated experience levels that had them starting out in BDSM when they were that young... Yet they feel some need to say when you're that young you can't know what it's all about.
Actually what he's saying is that to be that young you really don't know what it's like to be dominant.(I say that because in his profile he states he is looking for subs 18-35 but for dommes they need to be older, 35ish) I think he's full of shit, but it goes beyond this one profile.
Now, we can probably correctly assume these are the sort of people who believe that one must know what it is like first hand to be a submissive before they can ever hope to be a successful dominant. And there are many who feel this way but to them I say bullshit. Just because someone talked YOU into serving as a submissive to some dom/me as a way to "learn" don't go around thinking this is how it must be.
Granted, when someone is 18-20 it's simply not possible to have the sort of experience that makes them an expert or whatever, (This goes for all of you) but you'd be badly mistaken to believe those same people don't know what it's about... Especially now with the oodles and oodles of information easily available to nearly everyone.
Oh but it was different back in the old guard days. Yeah, different.. and not at all easy to break into when most of the BDSM clubs stayed underground. If anything, it's easier today because of the readily available information, the many munches and educational functions.. etc.
Here's a profile where it's just plain funny to see the difference between what it says and WHAT it says....Huh? Wait....
This is a 99 female switch from Washington and here's the first paragraph of the profile as written..
"First off this girl's Dom reads her profile so,Doms will be sent to bulk.. this is a message from her Dom."
Okay, that's what it says.. but let's rewrite that for what it really SAYS, eh?
"This girl belongs to me, Master CockJockey. I monitor this girl's profile and will send all messages from other Doms to bulk because like I don't share and stuff and I don't trust her to do as I say and not talk to other Doms so i've taken matters into my own hands and will not take any chances."
Oh okay, that was too easy.
Especially after seeing this journal from a 47 female switch in California. The journal is a couple of years old so you may have seen this... if not, fasten your seatbelts.
"The D/s BS Translator:
1. "Your submission is a precious gift - it should not be given
lightly." [Translation: So how about you stop putting out all over
town?]
2. "My role is to help you identify then stretch your limits"
[Translation: limits schmimits....let's do what I like for a change.]
3. "My pet, you seem to be struggling with your submission - that is a
natural feeling." [Translation: Any more smart ass back chat from you
and you'll be kicked to the curb.]
4. "You seem troubled my pet. We should talk." [Translation: Your
sulking is giving me the shits.]
5. "You are so wonderfully responsive" [Translation: You wail like a
banshee and move around so much I want to hit every major
organ....including your brain.]
6. "It is only in being owned that you will ever be completely free."
[Translation: I need some shmuck to give up his own life to wait on me
hand and foot without payment.]
7. "I have 20 years experience" [Translation: 20 years ago I tied
someone to the bed and last week I tried it again.]
8. "For me, the ritual of aftercare is the most important part of our scene"
[Translation: Because that is when you stagger off to get me a drink.]
9. "A true Dom has humility and never stops learning." [Translation:
Yeah, so I fucked up again: don't give me that accusing look, you big
sook.]
10. "I never, ever strike in anger." [Translation: It just feels that
way when you give me shit.]
11. It is time we explored polyamory together." [Translation: It is
time I bonked other people. You can help me pick them up and be my
excuse to get rid of them afterward]
12. "I cannot meet you at a BDSM club because I am a very private
person." [Translation: I cannot meet you at a BDSM club because I am a
very married person.]
13. "I trained as a Domina in Europe in my early 20s." [Translation: I
had a kinky shag when backpacking around Europe after Uni.]
14. "SM? Don't think of it as pain. Think of it as intense sensation."
[Translation: This is going to hurt like hell, but I am almost certain
a big man like is going to be too proud to safeword and stop the party.]
15. "You can only be a truly successful Dominant if you have
submitted." [Translation: I want you to sub to me, and that sounds
like a legit reason you might actually consider it.]
16. "You must master your own life before you can master another's."
[Translation: You need to have a 20-thousand square foot house and be
pulling down at least 250k a year or the deal's are all off buddy. As
a sub, I need to be accommodated in the style I would like to become
accustomed to.]
17."I have no limits." [Translation: Until you go beyond what is legal
so I can have you charged, convicted and sue you to live the rest of
my life off the proceeds]
18. "That's not a Dom--that's a control freak." [Translation: Get rid
of that guy I wanna be your Dom cuz I hear you give good head.]
19. "All Dommes need is to find the right man." [Translation: Cuz I'm IT!]
20. "You aren't sub enough." [Translation: I can't handle a guy with a
mind of his own without resorting to cheap manipulation.]
21. "You're not submissive enough." [Translation: Because you won't
quit your management job, move to Nebraska today and give me oral sex
on the off-hand promise I might actually start a relationship with you.]
22. "You're not Dominant Enough" [Translation: You're no fun. You
won't maim me permanently and it's always been my biggest fantasy.]
The D/s BS Translator for Online Profiles:
23. "I'm service-oriented." [Translation: I hope the dumb sap falls
for this so he'll let me clean his place and I can snoop through his
shit.]
24. "I'm under consideration." [Translation: I'm chasing someone.]
25. "I've been released." [Translation: I've been dumped.]
26. "I am a true dom/sub." [Translation: You're a phony if you aren't
just like me.]
27. "I am a bratty sub." [Translation: I am a pain in the ass.]
28. "I will bend you to my will." [Translation: I am insane.]
29. "I am a submissive with slave tendencies." [Translation: Pick me
because I'm pretending to be subbier (or better) than a regular
submissive.]
31. "I am seeking my One." [Translation: Someone out there must have
dysfunctions which are compatible with mine.]
32. "I'm trained." [Translation: I will drive you nuts doing exactly
what my last master wanted.]
33. "I am a 24/7 slave, online only." [Translation: I am a bored housewife.]
34. "I'm strict but fair." [Translation: I'm always right, you're
always wrong, and I'll beat you whenever you're right and I don't want
to admit it.]
35. "I am a trainer of sluts." [Translation: I'm looking for girls
who will believe they are being "trained" when I order them to blow me.]
36. "Looking for a sub/slave/girl to join us." [Translation (when
posted by a sub/slave/girl): I am much too lazy to clean the house and
I need a work horse. Translation (when posted by the dominant): I need
a backup fuck for when she's mad at me. Bonus points if you'll take my
side in the argument.]"
Heh, so much for this blog.. that journal says it all. *laughing*.
And now for a little humor injected into the blog, this is a 44 dominant in the UK.. Check the profile..
"A little pissed off with this women saying there into certain things and really they dont have a clue what bdsm is."
Now... the profile picture? Oh yeah, it's of a guy in a Darth Vader costume.. I'm just sayin'!!!
Thursday, June 9, 2011
Typing is going to be a bit difficult for me in the next few weeks. I was at the gym taking a Zumba class when my knee gave out and down I went... Apparently I tried to break the fall with my hands and whelp... bad idea, broken bones in my right hand....(I said apparently because it happened so fast I don't remember.) Yeah, I don't have a kneecap in one of my knees so it's prone to just give out at random times, and this time it was when I was in the middle of a thrust... First time I actually got hurt though. Now I know, I know it's not a good idea to break your fall with your hands but the brain sees a large hard object heading your way. (The ground) and the hands automatically shoot out. And errrr, i've yet to master that whole failing to miss the ground bit when trying to fly.
Soooooo.. i'm sitting in the emergency room with my hand throbbing and the triage nurse is sitting there bitching because she's having trouble spelling some of the medications i'm on.. I'm like "fuck you, just get it close and let me see a fucking doctor already!" Heheh, yeah I laugh at myself about shit like this.. Or rather I will when the fucking thing stops hurting.
That reminds me, people in the medical profession.. (EMS people in particular) who are into "medical BDSM" really scare the shit out of me. There were a couple such people who were a part of group I used to belong to.. These two would start discussing cases and you could see the gleam in their eyes.. I stayed the fuck away from them. No no no.. That's taking job satisfaction a little too far...
Oh yes, and when you nurses are trying to take blood and you keep missing the vein.. it's not MY fucking fault!! "rolling veins" or "collapsed veins" .. "alligator skin.." How come there's always that one person in the office who can hit the vein first time, every time? huh? huh? huh?
And please, no sympathy messages... Err and any requests for pictures of the cast/splint better be accompanied by plenty of cash.. (Eh, kidding... kidding...)
Oh if you've never done Zumba I highly recommend it. It's high energy and a lot of fun to do. It sure beats the hell out of the damned nautilus circuit.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qsSrq3HBa7A&feature=related
Right then, here we go into the profiles..
This is another of those assmunchers who is pretending to be a military guy.. This one's name on CollarMe is masterjaz and is a 27 dominant in California.... Here's his line of shit...
"Hi, I saw your profile and would like to get to know you. I have been in the lifestyle since I was 18. I spent the past 8 years in Iraq doing 4 tours of duty and only got back 5 days ago. I'm currently in CA awaiting my release orders and will be returning to LA once the processing is completed.
Heres a lil about me that would possibly explain my character and identity as a dominant. I was kicked outta home when I was 15, basically cause it was difficult at home and i ended up living on the streets for 2 years, eating off bins and finding shelter wherever I could. This period in my life taught me a big lesson about security and being assertive, as its a very dangerous world out there, esp on your own as a 15 year old. I learned to look after myself, fight for my survival and I believe was the starting point of my evolution as a dominant male, although I strong believe I've always had that characteristic trait within me. At 17, I was introduced to the Army, who were initiating a recruitment drive for homeless/uneducated kids, to be trained, given an education and also a situation which they provided shelter and food. It was the best thing for me and hence, I enlisted.
The was a proviso though, 2 tours in Iraq. I ended up doing 4 tours which gave me the ability to also continually study and specialize, I have a masters degree in counter terrorism and am a counter insurgence specialist. I am a warrior at heart. I am true to myself and my desires, a very straight forward person. As for my search for a female who I could call my better half, in this lifestyle. I cannot see myself with any vanilla girl. I have desires, needs and wants that cannot be satisfied by females outside this lifestyle.
I'm being straight up, I'm a provider and protector and this would emulate my need for a female who believes in herself as a true sub or interested in learning, we could grow together, thats my motto. Looking for someone who is the same, in the hope that it could develop into a long term relationship. Thats pretty much me in a nutshell."
Oh, this one is FUNNY though... It's funny because i'm going to show you the epic failsauce of this clown..
First, the first photo on his profile is from one of those beefcake websites, gorgeousboys I think it was.. Right, and then the person he chose to use his pictures is a marine reservist and not in the army as jazzy here claims.. Nor has he ever been deployed to a combat zone as our hero here claims he has.. ummmm..
Hold on, hold on, this gets good.. You see the person on the website (The actual person in the photo) is the very same person who in 2009 beat a Greek Orthodox Priest with a tire iron when the man who could barely speak English, was asking for directions. This happened in Tampa and the man's name is Jasen Bruce. Look up that name on google after you've checked out this asshole's profile... And errr.. feel free to raz his ass while you're at it.
More about that tire iron bit.. At first Bruce said he thought the man said Allahu Akbar (God is great) which Bruce said, "That's what they say before they blow you up." Later, Bruce changed his story and said the priest was trying to hit on him and grabbed his goodies, using the "gay panic" defense... But that's off point here..
This one is funny because of the person our hero masterjaz is pretending to be on collarme... Epic fail.
This next one is kind of cute and a bit funny.. This is a 19 dominant in Utah and I swear, he's spent time reading profiles of dominants.. he HAD to have because.. Well let's look at his profile..
"I might be young, but I am fit to command!!
I'm not fake...I'm totally honest. I will not play games!!!! I am serious!!!
I'm new here looking for my future partner. I'm 19; I may be young and look underage. I'm going to College for film and arts. I don't really know what to say but if you want to know anything just ask? I'd love to talk to everyone and get to know you if possible! Do not confuse my compassionate nature as a weakness... I'm honest and true to myself and not really good with first impression message!!!!
I'm looking for my future!! Not ever going to be a femboy!!!
PM me or live chat I don't care if you do.
If you want to talk on yahoo or live messenger… Message me!"
Mmmm, he's wrong about one thing though... Dress him up in a skirt and feed a nice 8 inch strap-on up his butt and he'll squeal just like a little girl.. Never gonna be a femboy huh?
Another kid who looks like he should be playing third base on a little league team trying to play dom on the internet. :-P Eh, he's a cutie though.
Here's a submissive who took a well aimed shot at some dommes in one of her journals, and it made me giggle to read.. I must pass it along.. This is a 21 female submissive in Canada and here's the journal..
"i have just finished reading about 6 profiles with rants of various lengths on them warning people against 'wasting My precious time with' (pick one) short messages, long messages, messages without a picture, messages that use internet shorthand, messages that don't use proper terminology, messages that dont have tribute attached...and the list goes on.
The vast majority of these profiles belong to Dommes...i guess us subbies dont mind having our time wasted, haha! Anyway...an observation...if You have time to come on collarme at ALL..You have time to waste...lol....oppss...sorry...damm internet shorthand... "
Oh SNAP! You tell em! Of course you know the Dommes are gonna come right back at you with the fact that since you're sub it doesn't matter about your time, because they're like the Domme, yanno? Heh, good one though.
Ahh and this just in.. I knew that sooner or later someone was gonna post a profile with the stated goal of starting a new country.. We've already read about the Amazonian Templars and the New Spartans.. But this one.. errrr.. It was sent to me like ummm.... just now.. here it is....
This is a 21 female dominant in Washington....
"Hi, my name is Kelly. Nice to meet you.
I am a beautiful goddess and deserve to be worshiped and adored by all. Men, women, dominant, submissive, you all ought to be on your knees before the almighty Kelly!
I am looking for lots of people, because I am trying to start my own country. Even my own personal country (it will be called "Kellyrike") isn't near what a girl of my beauty and intelligence deserves, but it would be a nice start.
There isn't enough room for my country though, because the greedy twats who run the world already divided it up. So my plan is to take the nation of Antigua and Barbuda and declare it mine. "Wait a second, Kelly, that's absurd!" you may be thinking. I'm pleased to tell you that it is not. Antigua and Barbuda has one of the smallest and most ill-financed militaries in the world, mainly because nobody even knows where the fuck it is so it's pretty safe.
I am looking to build an army to help me overthrow the silly country. I fully expect most of you to join my army and become slaves to my will. I am your commander, queen and goddess and you will worship me and obey my every order.
If any of you stupid fucks want to mess with me, I will get my revenge, if word of this effort gets out to the Antigua and Barbudan government or the U.S. government, you will suffer for it.
Also, this is completely legal. The constitution doesn't have a "no private armies" clause, that's a common myth.
I am a strong believer in female supremacy. Men have always bothered me ever since I was a little girl, they think they're so much better than us. How stupid can you get? When I establish Kellyrike, girls will have positions of authority, while boys will be peasants and soldiers. Only the most worthy boys will be even considered for positions in the government.
If you are ready to seek higher meaning in your life and submit to the future queen of the world, send me a message and I will tell you what you can do for me and how you can join my noble cause."
I swear if I didn't know any better i'd say I wrote this profile myself.. But nope, can't take credit for this one.
Eh, i'm up much too late.. Off to post this and then off to make sleepy night-night.
Soooooo.. i'm sitting in the emergency room with my hand throbbing and the triage nurse is sitting there bitching because she's having trouble spelling some of the medications i'm on.. I'm like "fuck you, just get it close and let me see a fucking doctor already!" Heheh, yeah I laugh at myself about shit like this.. Or rather I will when the fucking thing stops hurting.
That reminds me, people in the medical profession.. (EMS people in particular) who are into "medical BDSM" really scare the shit out of me. There were a couple such people who were a part of group I used to belong to.. These two would start discussing cases and you could see the gleam in their eyes.. I stayed the fuck away from them. No no no.. That's taking job satisfaction a little too far...
Oh yes, and when you nurses are trying to take blood and you keep missing the vein.. it's not MY fucking fault!! "rolling veins" or "collapsed veins" .. "alligator skin.." How come there's always that one person in the office who can hit the vein first time, every time? huh? huh? huh?
And please, no sympathy messages... Err and any requests for pictures of the cast/splint better be accompanied by plenty of cash.. (Eh, kidding... kidding...)
Oh if you've never done Zumba I highly recommend it. It's high energy and a lot of fun to do. It sure beats the hell out of the damned nautilus circuit.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qsSrq3HBa7A&feature=related
Right then, here we go into the profiles..
This is another of those assmunchers who is pretending to be a military guy.. This one's name on CollarMe is masterjaz and is a 27 dominant in California.... Here's his line of shit...
"Hi, I saw your profile and would like to get to know you. I have been in the lifestyle since I was 18. I spent the past 8 years in Iraq doing 4 tours of duty and only got back 5 days ago. I'm currently in CA awaiting my release orders and will be returning to LA once the processing is completed.
Heres a lil about me that would possibly explain my character and identity as a dominant. I was kicked outta home when I was 15, basically cause it was difficult at home and i ended up living on the streets for 2 years, eating off bins and finding shelter wherever I could. This period in my life taught me a big lesson about security and being assertive, as its a very dangerous world out there, esp on your own as a 15 year old. I learned to look after myself, fight for my survival and I believe was the starting point of my evolution as a dominant male, although I strong believe I've always had that characteristic trait within me. At 17, I was introduced to the Army, who were initiating a recruitment drive for homeless/uneducated kids, to be trained, given an education and also a situation which they provided shelter and food. It was the best thing for me and hence, I enlisted.
The was a proviso though, 2 tours in Iraq. I ended up doing 4 tours which gave me the ability to also continually study and specialize, I have a masters degree in counter terrorism and am a counter insurgence specialist. I am a warrior at heart. I am true to myself and my desires, a very straight forward person. As for my search for a female who I could call my better half, in this lifestyle. I cannot see myself with any vanilla girl. I have desires, needs and wants that cannot be satisfied by females outside this lifestyle.
I'm being straight up, I'm a provider and protector and this would emulate my need for a female who believes in herself as a true sub or interested in learning, we could grow together, thats my motto. Looking for someone who is the same, in the hope that it could develop into a long term relationship. Thats pretty much me in a nutshell."
Oh, this one is FUNNY though... It's funny because i'm going to show you the epic failsauce of this clown..
First, the first photo on his profile is from one of those beefcake websites, gorgeousboys I think it was.. Right, and then the person he chose to use his pictures is a marine reservist and not in the army as jazzy here claims.. Nor has he ever been deployed to a combat zone as our hero here claims he has.. ummmm..
Hold on, hold on, this gets good.. You see the person on the website (The actual person in the photo) is the very same person who in 2009 beat a Greek Orthodox Priest with a tire iron when the man who could barely speak English, was asking for directions. This happened in Tampa and the man's name is Jasen Bruce. Look up that name on google after you've checked out this asshole's profile... And errr.. feel free to raz his ass while you're at it.
More about that tire iron bit.. At first Bruce said he thought the man said Allahu Akbar (God is great) which Bruce said, "That's what they say before they blow you up." Later, Bruce changed his story and said the priest was trying to hit on him and grabbed his goodies, using the "gay panic" defense... But that's off point here..
This one is funny because of the person our hero masterjaz is pretending to be on collarme... Epic fail.
This next one is kind of cute and a bit funny.. This is a 19 dominant in Utah and I swear, he's spent time reading profiles of dominants.. he HAD to have because.. Well let's look at his profile..
"I might be young, but I am fit to command!!
I'm not fake...I'm totally honest. I will not play games!!!! I am serious!!!
I'm new here looking for my future partner. I'm 19; I may be young and look underage. I'm going to College for film and arts. I don't really know what to say but if you want to know anything just ask? I'd love to talk to everyone and get to know you if possible! Do not confuse my compassionate nature as a weakness... I'm honest and true to myself and not really good with first impression message!!!!
I'm looking for my future!! Not ever going to be a femboy!!!
PM me or live chat I don't care if you do.
If you want to talk on yahoo or live messenger… Message me!"
Mmmm, he's wrong about one thing though... Dress him up in a skirt and feed a nice 8 inch strap-on up his butt and he'll squeal just like a little girl.. Never gonna be a femboy huh?
Another kid who looks like he should be playing third base on a little league team trying to play dom on the internet. :-P Eh, he's a cutie though.
Here's a submissive who took a well aimed shot at some dommes in one of her journals, and it made me giggle to read.. I must pass it along.. This is a 21 female submissive in Canada and here's the journal..
"i have just finished reading about 6 profiles with rants of various lengths on them warning people against 'wasting My precious time with' (pick one) short messages, long messages, messages without a picture, messages that use internet shorthand, messages that don't use proper terminology, messages that dont have tribute attached...and the list goes on.
The vast majority of these profiles belong to Dommes...i guess us subbies dont mind having our time wasted, haha! Anyway...an observation...if You have time to come on collarme at ALL..You have time to waste...lol....oppss...sorry...damm internet shorthand... "
Oh SNAP! You tell em! Of course you know the Dommes are gonna come right back at you with the fact that since you're sub it doesn't matter about your time, because they're like the Domme, yanno? Heh, good one though.
Ahh and this just in.. I knew that sooner or later someone was gonna post a profile with the stated goal of starting a new country.. We've already read about the Amazonian Templars and the New Spartans.. But this one.. errrr.. It was sent to me like ummm.... just now.. here it is....
This is a 21 female dominant in Washington....
"Hi, my name is Kelly. Nice to meet you.
I am a beautiful goddess and deserve to be worshiped and adored by all. Men, women, dominant, submissive, you all ought to be on your knees before the almighty Kelly!
I am looking for lots of people, because I am trying to start my own country. Even my own personal country (it will be called "Kellyrike") isn't near what a girl of my beauty and intelligence deserves, but it would be a nice start.
There isn't enough room for my country though, because the greedy twats who run the world already divided it up. So my plan is to take the nation of Antigua and Barbuda and declare it mine. "Wait a second, Kelly, that's absurd!" you may be thinking. I'm pleased to tell you that it is not. Antigua and Barbuda has one of the smallest and most ill-financed militaries in the world, mainly because nobody even knows where the fuck it is so it's pretty safe.
I am looking to build an army to help me overthrow the silly country. I fully expect most of you to join my army and become slaves to my will. I am your commander, queen and goddess and you will worship me and obey my every order.
If any of you stupid fucks want to mess with me, I will get my revenge, if word of this effort gets out to the Antigua and Barbudan government or the U.S. government, you will suffer for it.
Also, this is completely legal. The constitution doesn't have a "no private armies" clause, that's a common myth.
I am a strong believer in female supremacy. Men have always bothered me ever since I was a little girl, they think they're so much better than us. How stupid can you get? When I establish Kellyrike, girls will have positions of authority, while boys will be peasants and soldiers. Only the most worthy boys will be even considered for positions in the government.
If you are ready to seek higher meaning in your life and submit to the future queen of the world, send me a message and I will tell you what you can do for me and how you can join my noble cause."
I swear if I didn't know any better i'd say I wrote this profile myself.. But nope, can't take credit for this one.
Eh, i'm up much too late.. Off to post this and then off to make sleepy night-night.
Friday, May 27, 2011
It has umm, come to my attention.. (Yeah, as if I wasn't aware of this) that most of the people I make fun of are male dominants. That would be because when i'm browsing profiles, those are the ones with the most outrageous shit in them. Or rather those are the ones that happen to be on when i'm browsing.
Now we all know male dominants don't have a monopoly on outrageous shit in their profiles, and so I shall start off with a profile that rivals some of the more out of this world profiles of her male counterparts..
This is a 41 female dominant in Florida and this one's profile is chock full of funny..
"A Swedish/ Cherokee mix born in Vienna /Austria lived almost every where in Europe .The last place I ve lived was Germany where I really enjoyed the teachings of some of the greatest classical Masters and Mistresses in my young teenage years.In my early tween yrs. I relocated to the US where I was fortunate to learn the American way the new way cy ber/high tech bizarre way of this lifestyle . Both continents and teachings combined and you ll get me."
Hmmmmmmmm... I don't want to cast doubts or anything like that.. But a Swedish/Cherokee mix born in Austria? I'd be real interested in knowing how someone got that particular mixture of lineage but we're going to skip over that bit because a quick search of the profile picture reveals to us this person is (well the pictures at least) in fact one Irina Voronina, a Russian.
*boggle*
A little bit MORE research reveals that Irina Voronina was a playboy playmate in 2001 and is also in the HDNet series called Svetlana. Hmmmm, ya think maybe this is another fake? Ah yeah, but let's read the rest of this profile.
"I am not self titled I received my RANK from the ADULT PORN & ENTERTAINMENT INDUSTRY.
I was crowned to be a GODDESS the highest achievement a FEMME DOMME can reach.
I am also a member of the Society of Body languages and their Expressions
I am a member and chair woman of Human Rights in the Alternative Lifestyle"
Awwwwwwwww shit, here we go then... Here we have a supposed domina given her "rank" from the fucking porn industry? Heh, and crowned GODDESS which is rather the highest level of acheivement a female dominant can attain.. Errrr as says the Adult Porn & Entertainment Industry... Umm for those of you who say BDSM ain't about sex.. errr oops?
I'm sure there a lot of folks sitting there who went the old guard route saying, "hey, what the fuck?" Yeah, that would be a real downer to have devoted all sorts of time to the lifestyle studying under the great dragon master of all that there is... Only to find the porn industry is handing out titles. However, take heart... She DOES add the required "studied under the greatest classical masters and mistresses" in her profile, so she's on track I think...(Of course in the capitol of the BDSM world, Germany.) And then came to America to learn the high tech/cyber techniques.. *giggle*
Oh come on.. that shit is funnyyyyyyy!
A little time out here to send a special message to any fans and supporters of the English Premier League team Liverpool...
19!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kC_KU7eUAvM&feature=related
*sweet smile*
Of course unless you follow English Football (soccer) that won't make a lot of sense to you, but the Liverpool fans are calling me all sorts of names right about now.
Sometimes people use their journals to basically act as a diary of sorts. Yeah I know, i've also seen people complaining about those who do this, fuck those people.. Ah anyway, sometimes people use their journal to pass along any new information they feel you the reader of their profile should know....
Such as this 41 female dominant from Michigan. (And yes, there IS a Rochester in Michigan.)
"I'm not interested in anyone ...yesterday or today. Feeling Quite pissy, and not in the least bit wanting to take it out on any of your asses. Relax, deep breaths, I am not here to please everyone. I do not HAVE to respond to your messages the moment I read them. I am entitled to shitty moods too."
Actually this entire profile and the rest of the journal entries scream, "shitty mood" but that matters not.. This one just strikes me as exceptionally funny that this person felt the need to logon and post the above journal. Color me nutty but wouldn't staying the fuck offline have kept you from having to go off on someone? Nah, that would have been too simple when the aim here is clearly to have the excuse to go postal on someone... You know, to exhibit her DOMME side.
So... Here's one that will get your funny bone active... If it's not already.
A 40 lesbian female dominant in New York..
"I am here representing The Order Of Amazonian Templars, a secret society dedicated to returning the world to its natural, Female dominated, order. We are dedicated to the ideals of Female Supremacy and to the goals of returning males to their rightful place as toilet-slaves and livestock."
Hmmm, a real secret society called the order of amazonaian templars... A secret society...
Errr, now is it just me or does the whole idea of secret rather heavily involve NOT TELLING everyone?
Oh this profile goes on and on about their goals and all that shit.. excuse me a moment folks.
(Nips off to fill the bong with some good shit... takes a few hits then floats back to the computer.)
Oh wowwwwww!.. that's better now where was I?
Oh yeah.. this profile also lists another person to contact if you wanna like doante to their cause..
So let's follow this thread and see where it leads.. It leads to a 37 female dominant in Texas and here's the first paragraph in her profile..
"If you are a male unless the very first word in your email is the word "DONATION" your email will be deleted unread. And NO I don't want you to be my slave, I already have one. And I don't give a shit how pretty you think I am or if you like my profile!!!"
Oh dear, poor males who want this bitch's attention eh? Gotta donate to get it... Hey wait, haven't we heard that one before?
Anyyyyyyyyyyhow.. this profile also goes on..
" Hey, This is my new profile, I deleted my old one. I am Goddess Xxxxxxx. I serve as a Priestess in the Order Of Amazonian Templars and I currently hold The title of Treasurer Of The Order. All donations to the Order go through Me. I am deeply honored to hold this position of trust and importance. All donations made to the Order go directly back into the Order itself and our activities. This includes the development of new Covens, the creation of Temples, administrative and orginazational costs, the creation of literature and propaganda, The Living Space Project, and other projects of importance to the Order."
Oooooooo a fucking priestess no less, not a normal run of the mill financial cunt at all is she? I dunno folks, I have a funny feeling this particular organization isn't going to be getting very far... They ain't ever got a damned website.. In fact the first profile says they are using CM to recruit.... sheeeeesh!
Okay right then... here's another journal from that 54 dominant in New Jersey, the one who thinks deleting messages unread is like buying a lottery ticket and tossing it out before the numbers are drawn...
"Everyone is flooded with way too many messages (real or fake), so to better control this and not waste anyones time, if you "open" my message but you do not reply within 2 days then you get blocked and I move on to find someone else who seriously wants this! Plus, because of how badly this site is infested with fakes and scammers, you must still somehow convince me that you are for REAL! That just proves how messed up this site has become!"
Now, this can only be to sooth his own bruised ego... Because really, if you send someone a message and they didn't reply within your two day time time, blocking them accomplishes nothing seeing as they weren't going to be sending you any messages anyway. Eh, I suppose what ever makes you feel better about being ignored by someone not interested in you, huh?
I meant to favorite another profile when I saw it, but for some reason I didn't do so.. But this person had a journal entry that basically said if she blocked you, it means she's not interested in you.
Well yeah, I think that would rather be a clue, wouldn't you?
One more before I nip off to finish this bong and then go eat a bunch of junk food.. This is a 41 Dominant in New Jersey..
"We are the New Spartans! We are looking for good people who are interested in forming a group of good, strong, freedom loving friends.
I AM XXXXXX MASTER AND COMMANDER OF THE NEW SPARTANS Anyone interested in forming a strong and new Spartan society message me. We are all going to be EQUALS Join us and become Stronger and Truely FREE."
Uh yeah.. You see what happens when you smoke one too many blunts? That shit gets in your head and you start coming up with some weird shit.... Was probably watching a certain movie while snarfing those cheetos and thought, "Oh cool shit.. I gotta do something with this."
Now if you will excuse me, a half gallon of Triple Fudge ice creme is calling me.. very loudly.
LOL, oh wait.. This just in... a 48 male submissive in the UK and the first two pictures show flowers in this guy's ass.. One of them a rose.. Errrr.. Ummm.. Naw, I can't.. I just can't say it..
Now we all know male dominants don't have a monopoly on outrageous shit in their profiles, and so I shall start off with a profile that rivals some of the more out of this world profiles of her male counterparts..
This is a 41 female dominant in Florida and this one's profile is chock full of funny..
"A Swedish/ Cherokee mix born in Vienna /Austria lived almost every where in Europe .The last place I ve lived was Germany where I really enjoyed the teachings of some of the greatest classical Masters and Mistresses in my young teenage years.In my early tween yrs. I relocated to the US where I was fortunate to learn the American way the new way cy ber/high tech bizarre way of this lifestyle . Both continents and teachings combined and you ll get me."
Hmmmmmmmm... I don't want to cast doubts or anything like that.. But a Swedish/Cherokee mix born in Austria? I'd be real interested in knowing how someone got that particular mixture of lineage but we're going to skip over that bit because a quick search of the profile picture reveals to us this person is (well the pictures at least) in fact one Irina Voronina, a Russian.
*boggle*
A little bit MORE research reveals that Irina Voronina was a playboy playmate in 2001 and is also in the HDNet series called Svetlana. Hmmmm, ya think maybe this is another fake? Ah yeah, but let's read the rest of this profile.
"I am not self titled I received my RANK from the ADULT PORN & ENTERTAINMENT INDUSTRY.
I was crowned to be a GODDESS the highest achievement a FEMME DOMME can reach.
I am also a member of the Society of Body languages and their Expressions
I am a member and chair woman of Human Rights in the Alternative Lifestyle"
Awwwwwwwww shit, here we go then... Here we have a supposed domina given her "rank" from the fucking porn industry? Heh, and crowned GODDESS which is rather the highest level of acheivement a female dominant can attain.. Errrr as says the Adult Porn & Entertainment Industry... Umm for those of you who say BDSM ain't about sex.. errr oops?
I'm sure there a lot of folks sitting there who went the old guard route saying, "hey, what the fuck?" Yeah, that would be a real downer to have devoted all sorts of time to the lifestyle studying under the great dragon master of all that there is... Only to find the porn industry is handing out titles. However, take heart... She DOES add the required "studied under the greatest classical masters and mistresses" in her profile, so she's on track I think...(Of course in the capitol of the BDSM world, Germany.) And then came to America to learn the high tech/cyber techniques.. *giggle*
Oh come on.. that shit is funnyyyyyyy!
A little time out here to send a special message to any fans and supporters of the English Premier League team Liverpool...
19!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kC_KU7eUAvM&feature=related
*sweet smile*
Of course unless you follow English Football (soccer) that won't make a lot of sense to you, but the Liverpool fans are calling me all sorts of names right about now.
Sometimes people use their journals to basically act as a diary of sorts. Yeah I know, i've also seen people complaining about those who do this, fuck those people.. Ah anyway, sometimes people use their journal to pass along any new information they feel you the reader of their profile should know....
Such as this 41 female dominant from Michigan. (And yes, there IS a Rochester in Michigan.)
"I'm not interested in anyone ...yesterday or today. Feeling Quite pissy, and not in the least bit wanting to take it out on any of your asses. Relax, deep breaths, I am not here to please everyone. I do not HAVE to respond to your messages the moment I read them. I am entitled to shitty moods too."
Actually this entire profile and the rest of the journal entries scream, "shitty mood" but that matters not.. This one just strikes me as exceptionally funny that this person felt the need to logon and post the above journal. Color me nutty but wouldn't staying the fuck offline have kept you from having to go off on someone? Nah, that would have been too simple when the aim here is clearly to have the excuse to go postal on someone... You know, to exhibit her DOMME side.
So... Here's one that will get your funny bone active... If it's not already.
A 40 lesbian female dominant in New York..
"I am here representing The Order Of Amazonian Templars, a secret society dedicated to returning the world to its natural, Female dominated, order. We are dedicated to the ideals of Female Supremacy and to the goals of returning males to their rightful place as toilet-slaves and livestock."
Hmmm, a real secret society called the order of amazonaian templars... A secret society...
Errr, now is it just me or does the whole idea of secret rather heavily involve NOT TELLING everyone?
Oh this profile goes on and on about their goals and all that shit.. excuse me a moment folks.
(Nips off to fill the bong with some good shit... takes a few hits then floats back to the computer.)
Oh wowwwwww!.. that's better now where was I?
Oh yeah.. this profile also lists another person to contact if you wanna like doante to their cause..
So let's follow this thread and see where it leads.. It leads to a 37 female dominant in Texas and here's the first paragraph in her profile..
"If you are a male unless the very first word in your email is the word "DONATION" your email will be deleted unread. And NO I don't want you to be my slave, I already have one. And I don't give a shit how pretty you think I am or if you like my profile!!!"
Oh dear, poor males who want this bitch's attention eh? Gotta donate to get it... Hey wait, haven't we heard that one before?
Anyyyyyyyyyyhow.. this profile also goes on..
" Hey, This is my new profile, I deleted my old one. I am Goddess Xxxxxxx. I serve as a Priestess in the Order Of Amazonian Templars and I currently hold The title of Treasurer Of The Order. All donations to the Order go through Me. I am deeply honored to hold this position of trust and importance. All donations made to the Order go directly back into the Order itself and our activities. This includes the development of new Covens, the creation of Temples, administrative and orginazational costs, the creation of literature and propaganda, The Living Space Project, and other projects of importance to the Order."
Oooooooo a fucking priestess no less, not a normal run of the mill financial cunt at all is she? I dunno folks, I have a funny feeling this particular organization isn't going to be getting very far... They ain't ever got a damned website.. In fact the first profile says they are using CM to recruit.... sheeeeesh!
Okay right then... here's another journal from that 54 dominant in New Jersey, the one who thinks deleting messages unread is like buying a lottery ticket and tossing it out before the numbers are drawn...
"Everyone is flooded with way too many messages (real or fake), so to better control this and not waste anyones time, if you "open" my message but you do not reply within 2 days then you get blocked and I move on to find someone else who seriously wants this! Plus, because of how badly this site is infested with fakes and scammers, you must still somehow convince me that you are for REAL! That just proves how messed up this site has become!"
Now, this can only be to sooth his own bruised ego... Because really, if you send someone a message and they didn't reply within your two day time time, blocking them accomplishes nothing seeing as they weren't going to be sending you any messages anyway. Eh, I suppose what ever makes you feel better about being ignored by someone not interested in you, huh?
I meant to favorite another profile when I saw it, but for some reason I didn't do so.. But this person had a journal entry that basically said if she blocked you, it means she's not interested in you.
Well yeah, I think that would rather be a clue, wouldn't you?
One more before I nip off to finish this bong and then go eat a bunch of junk food.. This is a 41 Dominant in New Jersey..
"We are the New Spartans! We are looking for good people who are interested in forming a group of good, strong, freedom loving friends.
I AM XXXXXX MASTER AND COMMANDER OF THE NEW SPARTANS Anyone interested in forming a strong and new Spartan society message me. We are all going to be EQUALS Join us and become Stronger and Truely FREE."
Uh yeah.. You see what happens when you smoke one too many blunts? That shit gets in your head and you start coming up with some weird shit.... Was probably watching a certain movie while snarfing those cheetos and thought, "Oh cool shit.. I gotta do something with this."
Now if you will excuse me, a half gallon of Triple Fudge ice creme is calling me.. very loudly.
LOL, oh wait.. This just in... a 48 male submissive in the UK and the first two pictures show flowers in this guy's ass.. One of them a rose.. Errrr.. Ummm.. Naw, I can't.. I just can't say it..
Monday, May 16, 2011
As I sit here and write this, I have found that the assclown alphacharie has either deleted or hidden 4 of his profiles. Only three remain, alphacharlie, alphacharlieAC, and alphacharlie07. Unfortunately the three that remain are the three that contain the photo of the killed in action soldier.
I would extend the invitation to anyone who disagrees with anything I post to either send me a message on CM or post a comment here and state your issue. Being disagreed with does not cause me to lose sleep or anything like that... I'll be more than happy to post your words unedited in this blog.
Of course if you come at me with loads of insults or whatever, heh.. then i'll still post your words.... along with a reply that I assure you will be a fitting response. But if you disagree with me without trying to have a go at me, i'll be just as civil.
Anyway, to respond to the person who posted a comment on 5-7-2011, it's not so much the few crackpot doms I post about, I do that for the comic value when their profiles contain the sort of nonsense they try to pass off as the truth. That particular entry was mostly about that alphacharlie asshole. The comic potential to his profiles went straight down the crapper once I realized he was using the photo of at least one killed in action soldier to present as being he.
As for the last part of your comment, you're SO preaching to the choir when you say safety demands one to be investigative and careful in the selection of a partner. I preach that shit until i'm blue in the face.
A couple of months ago I spoke of new ideas in the BDSM world that have come about as a result of the internet. Here's an example of such an idea.
Here's a 26 female dominant from London, UK and....
"I am a professional Teamviewer domme and love to blackmail my slaves and get information through teamviewer and for them to worship me through it."
A professional teamviewer domme.. Let's wrap our heads around that concept.. Paying someone to have access to your computer so that they can extract all that information about you for the purpose of blackmail.
Yeah, uhh... PAYING someone to blackmail you? I dunno about this one.. I just dunno.
Right then.. I have a somewhat serious question for the chastity slaves who actually send the key to their chastity device to a dom/domme from the internet they do not know in person.. Ummm, you DO have a spare key to it, errrr right? I mean, you wouldn't REALLY send the one and only escape from such a device to someone you don't even know in real life.. err would you?
No, I really want to know the answer to this question.. It'd be real interesting to hear some stories of those having to call a locksmith to get them out of it. You know, maybe the locksmith gets there and senses an opportunity.
"Well sure, I can get you out that device... But um, how did you get into it?"
"Oh uh, umm, well I sent the key to a dominant I met online and she like, errr deleted her profile and I can't contact her." .. Eh, I see the potential here!
Let's see about tweaking some more noses. This time, I think i'm going to be tweaking a lot of noses but we'll see how it works out. These are the people who in their profiles make it a point to tell you how dominant or submissive they are. Sometimes they will caution you the reader of their profile to not mistake their kindness for weakness, or something such as that.
No, when we read a comment such as that what shines though clearly is their insecurity right off the bat... But i'm off point.
Yeah, you know it's really pointless to go on about how strong of a dom you are or other things of that sort.. Because.. Well, because you're not the one who gets to decide those things. Oh, you can certainly post those things but they mean nothing at all really. The one who gets to decide how dominant (or even if you ARE dominant) are the people you interact with.
Wait, what? Yeah, that's what I said. It's up to the potential submissive to decide how strong you are or whether or not you're even a dominant. Their opinion? Sure it's only their opinion, but it's the one that counts in the end. Tell her how "alpha" you are all you want, but if she can't feel it, you ain't it.. At least not to her.
It's the same on the other side of the coin. Go on about how submissive you are as much as you'd like but in the end it's going to hinge upon the opinion of that potential dominant.
Besides now, when you see a profile of someone telling you how strong they are and on and on and on, what are you thinking about that person, really?
Eh, maybe that wasn't so much of a tweaking after all..
This profile just makes me laugh.. It's a 39 female submissive in Illinois.
"Currently in a sexless marriage and I am looking to change that. I am looking to meet up for some really good quickies. Car, woods, behind a building where ever! Name the place I will be there waiting, bent over and spread...just walk up stick your cock in me, grab my hips and pound away, cum then go! My time is limited since I have to sneak around...I can but only so many times I can go to the store."
I can think of a much easier way to change being in a sexless marriage.. Ummm, give up the pussy to your damned husband!!
Heh, but you know what will happen if someone takes this person's offer and meets them in the woods don't you? Let's see.. you enter the woods all horny because you saw those hot photos on this person's profile and you can't wait to slide it in to her..
Oh yeah.. then all of a sudden everything goes black..
When you wake up with a splitting headache from that blow to the head that knocked you out and discover you've lost your wallet... heh...
Come home to logon to CM and give that person a piece of your mind and oops.. the person no longer exists.. or has blocked you... You get it.
Eh, either that or when you message this person she quotes you a price.. hehe.
Her profile goes on to include a bit of a FAQ.. here's one item on it...
"Can I take pictures/video of my cock/cum in you? - Sure, why not - just no face shots."
Errr, I don't want to be the one to call out the obvious, but if you view this one's profile you will find that of the eight photos included, four are clear face shots.... And these ain't exactly G rated photos.
I have seen quite a few profiles where the people are posting journal entries wondering why all sorts of female dominants are viewing their profiles. I have been getting them as well but didn't think anything of it since i'm used to a variety of people viewing my profile.
However I may have a clue as to why these people are viewing a lot of profiles. There's a new "fake catching" site called collarmefakes.com and they are advising those who wish to help them on their oh so noble quest of weeding out the fakes to create a couple of fake profiles to do so.
Their manifesto is that by compiling a list of fakes and scammers they will get collarme to sit up and take notice.
One of the moderators posts this huge list of names, all submissive females aside from one female dominant. His criteria was that none of these people answered the messages that were sent to them.
That's a pretty lame reason for adding someone to a black list, but they're doing it nonetheless.
I laughed at the guy who did collarmebusts and the people who do catchafake2, but at least when they posted a name they had evidence... Usually that the pictures were taken from other websites.. THIS method is cheap and couple it with the fact they are creating yet more fake profiles make this a truly laughable project.
Now, I don't know for sure if these are the people behind the sudden influx of female dominants viewing profiles, but this site came into being on 5-1-2011... when did this influx start? Just sayin'.
On the subject of blogs, here's one I found both interesting and humorous.
http://thesubmissivelife.blogspot.com
But be cautioned, this person's political leaning is most decidedly to the left, so if your political lean is to the right you're likely not going to like a lot of what this person has to say. Still it's an interesting read... It's worth a look in any case.
Her profile on CM features some of the letters she's gotten from detractors, and her answers to those letters. Not sure if I want to name her name so i'll do my usual and say this is a 28 female submissive from Maryland... She shouldn't be difficult to find.
For the first time ever... err ever on this blog that is.. I'm going to be using a profile of someone I used in a previous post for another purpose. Did ya get that? mmm..
Right then, this is the same 60 dominant in Tennessee I used in the last entry.. This was the guy whining about people not reading his messages. While reviewing profiles (read as looking for the lulz) I found something else quite interesting about this clown's profile.. Here, check out the first paragraph.
"Finally... they accepted my photo.......
I had to redo my profile as somehow I cannot get my password for the original profile XxXxxxxx, but I hope this will not be a setback."
Right.. now just to satisfy my curiosity I looked up that username just to see what was on the old profile.. I found it and here's the interesting part..
That name was of a 45 dominant in Tennessee and hasn't logged on since 11-22-2008.. not quite three years ago... He's sure aged a lot since then eh?
Now after the shit he put in his new profile, just to know this was a lying fucker just makes me giggle all sorts of ways.
That's it for now... catch ya next time.
I would extend the invitation to anyone who disagrees with anything I post to either send me a message on CM or post a comment here and state your issue. Being disagreed with does not cause me to lose sleep or anything like that... I'll be more than happy to post your words unedited in this blog.
Of course if you come at me with loads of insults or whatever, heh.. then i'll still post your words.... along with a reply that I assure you will be a fitting response. But if you disagree with me without trying to have a go at me, i'll be just as civil.
Anyway, to respond to the person who posted a comment on 5-7-2011, it's not so much the few crackpot doms I post about, I do that for the comic value when their profiles contain the sort of nonsense they try to pass off as the truth. That particular entry was mostly about that alphacharlie asshole. The comic potential to his profiles went straight down the crapper once I realized he was using the photo of at least one killed in action soldier to present as being he.
As for the last part of your comment, you're SO preaching to the choir when you say safety demands one to be investigative and careful in the selection of a partner. I preach that shit until i'm blue in the face.
A couple of months ago I spoke of new ideas in the BDSM world that have come about as a result of the internet. Here's an example of such an idea.
Here's a 26 female dominant from London, UK and....
"I am a professional Teamviewer domme and love to blackmail my slaves and get information through teamviewer and for them to worship me through it."
A professional teamviewer domme.. Let's wrap our heads around that concept.. Paying someone to have access to your computer so that they can extract all that information about you for the purpose of blackmail.
Yeah, uhh... PAYING someone to blackmail you? I dunno about this one.. I just dunno.
Right then.. I have a somewhat serious question for the chastity slaves who actually send the key to their chastity device to a dom/domme from the internet they do not know in person.. Ummm, you DO have a spare key to it, errrr right? I mean, you wouldn't REALLY send the one and only escape from such a device to someone you don't even know in real life.. err would you?
No, I really want to know the answer to this question.. It'd be real interesting to hear some stories of those having to call a locksmith to get them out of it. You know, maybe the locksmith gets there and senses an opportunity.
"Well sure, I can get you out that device... But um, how did you get into it?"
"Oh uh, umm, well I sent the key to a dominant I met online and she like, errr deleted her profile and I can't contact her." .. Eh, I see the potential here!
Let's see about tweaking some more noses. This time, I think i'm going to be tweaking a lot of noses but we'll see how it works out. These are the people who in their profiles make it a point to tell you how dominant or submissive they are. Sometimes they will caution you the reader of their profile to not mistake their kindness for weakness, or something such as that.
No, when we read a comment such as that what shines though clearly is their insecurity right off the bat... But i'm off point.
Yeah, you know it's really pointless to go on about how strong of a dom you are or other things of that sort.. Because.. Well, because you're not the one who gets to decide those things. Oh, you can certainly post those things but they mean nothing at all really. The one who gets to decide how dominant (or even if you ARE dominant) are the people you interact with.
Wait, what? Yeah, that's what I said. It's up to the potential submissive to decide how strong you are or whether or not you're even a dominant. Their opinion? Sure it's only their opinion, but it's the one that counts in the end. Tell her how "alpha" you are all you want, but if she can't feel it, you ain't it.. At least not to her.
It's the same on the other side of the coin. Go on about how submissive you are as much as you'd like but in the end it's going to hinge upon the opinion of that potential dominant.
Besides now, when you see a profile of someone telling you how strong they are and on and on and on, what are you thinking about that person, really?
Eh, maybe that wasn't so much of a tweaking after all..
This profile just makes me laugh.. It's a 39 female submissive in Illinois.
"Currently in a sexless marriage and I am looking to change that. I am looking to meet up for some really good quickies. Car, woods, behind a building where ever! Name the place I will be there waiting, bent over and spread...just walk up stick your cock in me, grab my hips and pound away, cum then go! My time is limited since I have to sneak around...I can but only so many times I can go to the store."
I can think of a much easier way to change being in a sexless marriage.. Ummm, give up the pussy to your damned husband!!
Heh, but you know what will happen if someone takes this person's offer and meets them in the woods don't you? Let's see.. you enter the woods all horny because you saw those hot photos on this person's profile and you can't wait to slide it in to her..
Oh yeah.. then all of a sudden everything goes black..
When you wake up with a splitting headache from that blow to the head that knocked you out and discover you've lost your wallet... heh...
Come home to logon to CM and give that person a piece of your mind and oops.. the person no longer exists.. or has blocked you... You get it.
Eh, either that or when you message this person she quotes you a price.. hehe.
Her profile goes on to include a bit of a FAQ.. here's one item on it...
"Can I take pictures/video of my cock/cum in you? - Sure, why not - just no face shots."
Errr, I don't want to be the one to call out the obvious, but if you view this one's profile you will find that of the eight photos included, four are clear face shots.... And these ain't exactly G rated photos.
I have seen quite a few profiles where the people are posting journal entries wondering why all sorts of female dominants are viewing their profiles. I have been getting them as well but didn't think anything of it since i'm used to a variety of people viewing my profile.
However I may have a clue as to why these people are viewing a lot of profiles. There's a new "fake catching" site called collarmefakes.com and they are advising those who wish to help them on their oh so noble quest of weeding out the fakes to create a couple of fake profiles to do so.
Their manifesto is that by compiling a list of fakes and scammers they will get collarme to sit up and take notice.
One of the moderators posts this huge list of names, all submissive females aside from one female dominant. His criteria was that none of these people answered the messages that were sent to them.
That's a pretty lame reason for adding someone to a black list, but they're doing it nonetheless.
I laughed at the guy who did collarmebusts and the people who do catchafake2, but at least when they posted a name they had evidence... Usually that the pictures were taken from other websites.. THIS method is cheap and couple it with the fact they are creating yet more fake profiles make this a truly laughable project.
Now, I don't know for sure if these are the people behind the sudden influx of female dominants viewing profiles, but this site came into being on 5-1-2011... when did this influx start? Just sayin'.
On the subject of blogs, here's one I found both interesting and humorous.
http://thesubmissivelife.blogspot.com
But be cautioned, this person's political leaning is most decidedly to the left, so if your political lean is to the right you're likely not going to like a lot of what this person has to say. Still it's an interesting read... It's worth a look in any case.
Her profile on CM features some of the letters she's gotten from detractors, and her answers to those letters. Not sure if I want to name her name so i'll do my usual and say this is a 28 female submissive from Maryland... She shouldn't be difficult to find.
For the first time ever... err ever on this blog that is.. I'm going to be using a profile of someone I used in a previous post for another purpose. Did ya get that? mmm..
Right then, this is the same 60 dominant in Tennessee I used in the last entry.. This was the guy whining about people not reading his messages. While reviewing profiles (read as looking for the lulz) I found something else quite interesting about this clown's profile.. Here, check out the first paragraph.
"Finally... they accepted my photo.......
I had to redo my profile as somehow I cannot get my password for the original profile XxXxxxxx, but I hope this will not be a setback."
Right.. now just to satisfy my curiosity I looked up that username just to see what was on the old profile.. I found it and here's the interesting part..
That name was of a 45 dominant in Tennessee and hasn't logged on since 11-22-2008.. not quite three years ago... He's sure aged a lot since then eh?
Now after the shit he put in his new profile, just to know this was a lying fucker just makes me giggle all sorts of ways.
That's it for now... catch ya next time.
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