Poor Chuck, I know you all are dying to hear about him since i've not spoke of the poor guy for a long time.

Well as you know, he's a cocktail waitress at the Silver Slipper Casino. He was trying to be promoted from the 25 cent slots to the higher dollar tables but his supervisor said he didn't have the right look.

I'm a little biased, once he's tarted up with the right amount of makeup, I think he's pretty cute but apparently they don't want their waitresses looking too slutty. he came home last night in tears with his mascara running down his face.

He told me he was going to quit working there and move back to his parent's house. He was going on about something involving WOW but I couldn't quite make it out through his sobs. It was really a sad sight to see, oh well.


So, I have a serious question for you all if you care to answer. You men and women who make these mean and serious looking faces in your profile pics, umm what are you trying to accomplish there? I swear I pull up some of these profiles and I expect to hear growling coming out of the speakers.

"Grrr.. I'm a mean and nasty sadist.. I will hurt joo!"

And when I see profiles where people are going on about respect and all that stuff yet in their pics is a picture of this guy or gal flipping the bird at the camera. What the fuck is that all about?

I mean really now, what message are you trying to convey to the potential submissive when you post these mean looking pictures? I don't mind being the one to tell you they do not make you look more like a dominant, they make you look silly as hell... Just sayin'!


So what's wrong with this picture? The profile of a 41 female submissive from West Virginia states she is just looking for the owner of her soul. Okay, but the profile picture is a picture of her ass....

Mmmkay then. I'm not sure I want to even think about that one too long.


On to this post's spotlighted fake lesbian.... (I think I need a theme song for this segment, hmm.. I got one.. "Men in Tights" from that silly Mel Brooks Movie.

"We're mennn.. we're men in tiii--iiights.."

Yeah, uh right then, on with the segment.

"We're Butch!" *giggle* Okay okay, on with it then.

Today we shine the bright glare of the spotlights upon MsJailbird1 (Apparently the original MsJailbird got deleted, hmm.) Well, Here's the profile..

"I am a very dominant woman. I did time in prison and dominated women inside and owned women inside. I am looking to own women. NO MEN. I will control you every second of the day. I currently own slaves now and am looking to add more. WOMEN ONLY NO MEN. this will be total control and long term. Message ME if interested"

Now, I know I've seen the picture of this snarling bitch on the news... I just can't place it. Maybe one of you can look at this loser's profile and tell me who this woman is in that picture.

Oh yes, for all you contract totin' dommes.. psst, could be your roommate, never know.

Right then, now that she's out she wants some slaves on the outside to control every second of the day. Oh dear, and this will be total control for long term..

Wait, time out here..

Long term eh? Now you just KNOW "long term" will have to be put on indefinite hold when this waste of space fucks up again and gets sent back to the big house. And what'cha wanna bet part of the "control" will be to send the slaves out to do shit like rob liquor stores and stuff like that?

Now, as an aside...Notice that in this 4 lines of profile, the fake lesbian felt the need to say on two different occasions "No men".. And in ALL CAPS to make it stand out even more. Apparently the level of one's lesbianism is determined by how many times in their profile they say, "no men"

Soooooo.. to MsJailbird1.. Saaaaaaaaaa Luttteeeeeeeee!


Hmm, apparently submissive women don't have a monopoly on posting how they will be leaving the site on a certain day, and of course they get all sorts of new attention which is what they are seeking in the first place.
 
Well, i've seen the profile of a domme who has pulled the very same thing. First she posts in her profile and journals that she is leaving on Sunday.. Then on Friday or so she started to hedge, saying that while she was still leaning toward leaving, she was getting plenty of messages that are making her possibly have second thoughts.

Lo and behold on Sunday her profile and journal states she has indeed changed her mind and has decided to stay on CM for a bit. However, she then pulls the "I'm a DOMME" card and makes it clear she isn't interested in what anyone thinks about it, she is staying purely for her own amusement.

Uh huh, MsMere you probably should go ahead and leave... A domme who can't make a decision and stick to it is pretty weak willed and likely will mistreat some sub down the line by allowing them to walk all over you. Do yourself and the entire CM community a great favor and /delete.

And just when I think i'm starting to run out of material someone drops one of those gold nuggets right into my lap. This is a message I got out of the blue from a 26 dominant in Texas.

"Greetings, You have a very puzzling profile. I wonder how dominant you truly are, as you have yourself listed as a switch. I must also think that you still do submit, but it would take a very dominant individual to inspire you to do such. I started in the lifestyle at the age of 13 myself researching, and then ventured to RL at 16. I would be interested in talking with you and having some mutual brain picking."

Welllllllll.. you know how they say curiosity killed the cat? This kitty just HAD to read the profile that belonged to those words and there is a gem and half in there.. Here's a paragraph.

"Over the last few months, I have been warring with myself over this. It seems the gorean in me just wont quit, so unless you think you can submit to a gorean man, it is best you dont message me."

I know, I know, I said I wasn't going to have a go at the goreans but c'mon now, you really don't expect me to just let this one go untouched now do you? Really, if someone wants to base his or her life on those gor novels, who am I to say anything?

But people, come on now. In College that John Norman fella tried to score with a few coeds and they shot him down. So what does he do? Writes up a book where he creates a world where those very same coeds cannot turn him down, and Viola!!! Gor is born.

You can twist and turn it any way you like, you can go on about how you follow the principles of gor and are not really following the books...(Some even say gor is based on Victorian England)  No matter how you twist it you're living your life based on the poorly written Conan meets Star Trek called the gor novels.. How many were there, 25 or so?

Anyway, i'm not one to talk since I live my life to the teachings of Douglas Adams. Learning to fly is as simple as throwing yourself to the ground and somehow managing to miss. This is one gorean who has have never failed to miss, I think.

ANYWAY!!!!... I sent this guy back a reply.. Oh come now, you know I had to do it.

"You might just want to take a LITTLE closer of a look at my profile. It's pure satire. Heheh, the gorean in you huh? LOL, too funny."

JUST after sending this message that "who's viewing you" turned red and sure enough our gorean hero looked at my profile. Here's what he sent back. *giggle*

"ahhhh, well have fun making fun of people!"

I tried to send him back a comforting letter explaining that while I know it must hurt pretty bad to get hit with the stupid stick that hard, he should take comfort and learn from this experience... READ THE FUCKING PROFILE BEFORE YOU WHIP OUT YOUR E-PEEN AND TRY TO PLAY DOM ON THE INTERNET! You just never know what little bits of information you can gleen from doing so.. Ya jackass.

Alas, he had me blocked so my heartfelt attempt to help this poor soul did not get through. I'm sure if he reads this his ego will demand he respond in some way, and then i'll have moar lulz to post here. :-)

For now I must fly.. Weeeee.. OW!!! shit.. failed to miss again.