It's the day after Easter and the Easter bunny was delicious.

I have a brand new all time favorite profile and I simply must share it with you.
  
Ah okay then, here's a profile I read and went... "Brilliant!"

This is a 35 female dominant from Pennsylvania.
 
"In your email, tell me what I WON"T like; repeat tell me what I WILL NOT like about you.  i.e. I am married, I'm 5'0", I don't have a job, etc.  I'll find out eventually, right?  There's no sense hiding it from me.  Who knows, I may even be touched by your honesty."

Here's an innovative twist on the typical "don't you fuckin' lie to me" a lot of people put in their profiles. It's more like, "Tell ya what, instead of mucking about with all that getting to know each other nonsense, and me finding out you're a lying piece of shit later on, just gimme the dirt right up front and we'll see what happens."

I like it, I really do. In her journals, she goes on to say something about all the messages she gets along those lines, if so I say good for her!

Eh, of course you KNOW she's going to get her share of "Well, I have this bad habit that I need to be disciplined for" messages as well.

Think about it, how many of you have been lied to and the lie itself wasn't of real consequence other than the fact you WERE lied to? You know, something that if you'd have been told up front, wouldn't have made a difference?


Here's one i've had on my favorites list for a while, and to this point haven't pulled the proverbial trigger but I tell you all this profile never gets any less funny each time I read it.

This is a 98 dominant from "several states" and Nevada.

Err yeah that's right.. he's put 98 on his profile... AND gives a reason why he's done so...

"I am not 98 or 99 years old, as the profile indicates; but I put that in to drive away those who want a purported “master” in his 20s. I am NOT about “play” or “roles” (and you dare not ask me about those who think they can “switch” or who “started as a submissive and became a dom.” This is about LIFE not about games. Please understand that if you contact me."

Ummm, correct me if i'm wrong here.. but wouldn't doing something such as putting your real age in your profile accomplish the same thing? If someone is looking for a 20's dom and you're like 50 or so putting that age on your profile does the trick i'd think.. Eh.

Anyway, this cat has done it all! He's a world traveler and a professional gambler and has co-owned several dungeons but rarely (if ever) scenes in public. (Cause he's like into the LIFESTYLE, not a game, yanno?) He owns, manages, operates, buys, sells, and develops casinos all over the world. Of course this high profile lifestyle is the reason his head is chopped off in the grainy photo in the profile.

Now I feel almost duty bound to point out that someone who actually "owns" a casino would be a multi-millionaire since that's rather what they cost. I can assure you the lifestyle of someone such as a casino owner doers not include time for collarme, and the propects for someone to be his slave are WAY more plentiful than posting an anonymous ad on the internet.. But i'll refrain from doing so. *Sweet smile*

Now wait, i'm not saying you HAVE to have a lot of money to find a submissive, but come on.

"I am Euro-classical style master, trainer, mentor...which is VASTLY different from online silliness, ANY kind of roles or "playing" anything or even traditional BDSM"

This guy even goes on to compare himself to a 1940's type gangster. But umm, don't those folks who put all this stock in err "traditional BDSM" or "The old ways" point right TO the uh, "European style" as it were?

Yeah I get it, DeSade was French and Masoch was German...  But from reading some of these profiles of these so called traditionalists, it's not much of a stretch for me to believe they are more inspired by Mengele.


Have you ever been at a bar or any place and someone threatened to shove some random object up someone's ass? *clicks tongue*

Yeah, it seems a football (soccer) team from Wales was in the middle of an end-of-season party and a player got a pool cue shoved right up the bum...Check it out...

http://soccernet.espn.go.com/news/story/_/id/909800/end-of-season-party-is-pain-in-the-backside?cc=5901

This is truly one of those times where nothing more need be said.. Err, RACK folks, RACK.. LOL.


Here's one i'm not sure if it's a put on or not, but it's from someone who joined the site on 3-21-11 and appears to be a profile maintained and/or monitored by the dom who is named in her profile. This is a 20 female submissive in Nevada and well, here's a couple of paragraphs of her latest journal entry.

 I mentioned the date she joined because she has a lot of journal entries dated to the day after she joined.

"The last time I saw my owner he beat the fuck out of me, I was literally scared,crying and broken after wards, I didn't want him to touch me or be around me but he forced me to talk and explain how I felt. I didnt even try to move away at the end, I just kind of let my body go limp and started crying because I realized there was nothing I could do.

I was crying because I now realize how easy it is for him to hurt me, I knew that it was my actions that caused the punishments but it was more then I expected...I also cried because I had just undergone a surgery that I believe was my fault and I regret every single day."

Now this journal entry goes on to talk about how happy she is and that sort of thing, after which it turns sexual. I'm really only wondering if this is just some guy with a control fantasy and this person does not exist, or if this is on the level. Reading the profile of the dom she mentions makes me believe it's the former. (Or perhaps I should say hope, rather than believe...)


Woooot! I done made someone's blacklist of fakes again... Yay me! Sublisa007 has a blacklist on umm, her profile and your's truly was named along with several others. A little research has revealed this Sublisa007 person was also subbeth0019 that I mentioned here a couple of months ago..(Jan 17th, 2011 entry)

What sort of research you ask? Ah, nothing sinister I assure you.. It's just that that person when adding the names for his blacklist did so in link style. If you float your cursor over some of these links it's rather like doing the same with messages without opening them..

In one such link, this person's yahoo addy is included and that addy includes the word beth and the number 19.... Hmmmmmmmmm... *giggle*.. Err, and both are 19 and in texas.. YOU make the call!

This even gets better, this same person is also using the name rebeccaannL..(and messaged me) also 19 from texas...and the profile is yet another blacklist profile with the names in link style. Tsk tsk... Here, check out this little exchange.

 "rebeccaannL on 4/24/11 at 5:38 PM:

 hi my name is becki you are beautiful i am uncollared seekin g to be owned



 UltimateDomme on 4/24/11 at 5:41 PM:

 I thought it was lisa... or was it beth? is your yahoo addy still Xxxxxxxxxx?




 rebeccaannL on 4/24/11 at 5:43 PM:

 yes my full name is elizabeth my frinds call me either lisa, beth, becki"

Oh come on now!

Let's pile some more evidence on this heap before we send it to the jury.. Here's the first message I got from sublisa007

"sublisa007 on 4/17/11 at 5:52 AM:

 hi my name is lisa i a seeking to be be owned"

In the words of the immortal Kelly Bundy... "The prostitution rests"


Ahhh yes, something has come to my attention via the browsing of profiles.. It seems that the bitch is in actuality doing anything she can to get your money.. Yep yep yep..

I was looking for the lulz and this profile of a 51 male slave from Florida appeared on my screen. It has a cute picture of a squirrel holding the bars on a cage as the profile picture.. The profile itself is largely a rant about those financial cunts.. He posted a journal entry on 1-18-11 with a compiled list of some of these financial cunts, and their scam..

Errrr.. And included in this list is....

"UltimateDomme: She will try anything to get your money."

Now i've been accused of a lot of shit but never this.. LOL.

But hey, this was posted 3 months ago.. How come none of you told me about this? *giggle*



I got a message from someone who spoke of what I said in my last entry re: suspending disbelief. He said that while he agreed if someone's profile seems too out there it's a good bet there's a reason for it, there are times when you probably have to suspend disbelief within the BDSM scene. He mentions in specific when you're with a professional dominatrix.

Yeah, I agree with that if you really want the illusion of actually serving someone. If not, the reality is the Pro Domme is working for you and you actually have called the shots in much the same way as if you've negotiated a scene at a BDSM club. So yeah, that's a good place to suspend disbelief.

I'm sure there are other places as well, such as in roleplays or when there's a contract involved... But definitely not when you're reading someone's profile.


Here's one that is kind of cute... A 21 female submissive in Minnesota.

"ok, so like incase anyone is wondering
my very first exposure to this world was watching jerry springer
on this show was a woman in these awesome boots like laced up to her knees and this girl who was on her knees licking those boots"

Ahhhhhhhh, and you thought Jerry Springer was like just for lowbrow entertainment?


And finally, here's a 33 dominant in the UK and along with the usual "I'm the real deal", and all that sort of stuff, we find this paragraph in the middle of his profile.

"After my slaves have proved themselves as true genuine masochists. After a long period at least one year or so. Then i may reward them with using them for a special honour of being a sacrifice at one of my private discret parties."

A sacrifice at one of his private discreet parties. The optimist in me wants to say that when he says sacrifice he means the guest bunny at a gangbanging or something like that... But there's this earlier on in his profile..

"Torture toys will be used by me or my friends at my very discreet premises.  This is real and so i expect real slaves. You should expect once you give to me you will not have limits."

Hmm, so you're already gonna be getting passed around to his friends, can this cat really be talking about an actual sacrifice? Hmm.

Well, on the bright side I think we can be pretty sure this dude has never been with a real person in this capacity but i'm gonna keep this profile favorited.. just to see, eh?

Enough for now..